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Then, maybe one day hollonav get to the point where Ilya is resigned (aka understands it is Shane's choice to make) to The Mangoes, so it's the end of the season and it's Shane's Illegal Mango Time and Ilya (huffing and sighing and whining) presents Shane with a batch of precut, pre-tasted mangoes that Ilya visited like 3 separate stores to get. There are 3 in the tupperware versus the like 15 that Ilya bought to try, ranked for sweetness and juiciness etc etc. They are hands-down the best mangoes Shane has had in his entire life. This ranks amongst top 5 most romantic things Ilya has ever done for him. Ilya remains bewildered that he is getting kissed and thanked and blown because he is aiding and abetting Shane willingly poisoning himself every once in a while.

HI HELLO PLS HAVE FICLET BECAUSE I WAS INSPIRED BY WHAT IS INDEED THE MOST ROMANTIC GESTURE OF ALL TIME

Having his entire life implode around him has meant a variety of changes and plans and contingencies and conversations and contracts and discussions. 

It has also meant reducing this year’s Mango Time to only one week to fit within all of his other obligations. 

Naturally, because apparently it’s the theme of the entire fucking year, it also has to go badly. He had allotted himself three mangoes for the first day, but he’d ended up going through six in his increasing desperation to just find one fucking good one. 

He hadn’t succeeded. 

for anon who requested these as standalones <3

ilya domming & breeding kink version under the cut

I do think (and am charmed by) the idea that end of season/contracts/photoshoots is Mango Time

literally waits ALL year to have his delicious, delicious forbidden treat

Shane, actively setting his GPS to the nearest supermarket as he's leaving the locker room: "Sorry, I can't make it tomorrow."

Hayden: "... Mango day?"

it's like their second year of being friends, and hayden comes over because they're going to go for a run, and he opens the fridge to get some water and sees a COMICALLY large bowl of mangoes in there and is uuuh?? buddy?? you doing a new diet of just mangoes? and he is TOTALLY playful about it. it's just such a funny number of mangoes to see together.

and shane like. understands this is probably a non-normal way of celebrating the end of the season. he knows he's probably going to get chirped about this, and after a lifetime of being the odd man out at lunch tables and birthday cupcake sharing, he knows what's coming. so he explains that he's a little allergic (not dangerously but like. needs to take some allegra and also just be a little itchy for a couple of days) and yeah it's weird and he knows but-

fist bumps at the boards when one of them scores

Ilya getting to yell at the ref on Shane's behalf when he takes a cheap hit

Shane giving the hardest check of his career to the d-man that gave Ilya a minor concussion in the last game against them. The guy practically backflips but he's fine and the gif of Shane's snarling face goes viral

When Ilya loses a blade on the power play one time Shane's the closet one who can tow him to the bench (this goes VERY viral)

SICK PRETTY SHOTS on said power play, showing the world how fucking stupid everyone was to allow them to get on the same team

Locker Room / Bench

Guys tape everything—wrists, fingers, knees, ankles—and Ilya having strong opinions about how Shane tapes his wrists wrong and physically taking his hand and redoing it. It takes forever. You have to hold the wrist, keep tension on the tape. Shane spending the entire time staring at his face like he's having a religious experience.

The thing where your teammate finishes taping your stick because you're still messing with your skates. Deeply domestic. Completely normal hockey behavior. Ilya doing it for Shane without asking because he knows exactly how Shane likes his blade wrapped from years of studying him as an opponent. Shane does not Trust anyone else to even touch his stick

Ilya starts stealing Shane's sticks during morning skate and refusing to give them back until Shane physically wrestles them out of his hands.

Sharing a water bottle on the bench. Deeply unsanitary. Completely normal. Something you only really do with guys you're comfortable around. Ilya grabbing Shane's by mistake the first week and Shane not even mentioning it.

The thing where after a bad loss nobody talks. The room is silent except for tape ripping and gear getting packed away. Ilya sitting down next to Shane, shoulders touching, and saying absolutely nothing. Somehow that's the most anyone has said all night.

Sharing an iPad on the bench, shoulder-to-shoulder, drawing routes on the screen with gloved fingers. One of them grabbing the other's arm to point something out and not letting go because they're both still watching the clip.

The full-body lean that happens after a brutal shift. Just putting your entire weight onto the guy next to you because you're too tired to hold yourself up. Ilya doing it once without thinking and Shane automatically widening his stance to take the weight.

Ilya grabbing Shane's elbow during a TV timeout and physically moving him six inches to the left so he can see the whiteboard. Shane just lets himself be repositioned.

Guys smacking each other on the ass after a good play is so normalized in hockey it's practically invisible. The first time Ilya does it to Shane they both feel like they're getting away with something.

The way players grab the backs of each other's necks to get their attention. The way they grab cages to be heard over crowd noise. Ilya catching Shane by the visor and pulling him closer until they're practically nose-to-nose to say something, and Shane immediately going still.

Getting your jersey number called for a penalty and having to go to the box and your linemate skating you over, just a hand between the shoulder blades guiding you to the box door, and Shane doing this for Ilya once and Ilya looking back at him through the glass from the penalty box and Shane just tapping his own chest twice like I've got it, go sit down (I realize they're both centers but maybe occasionally Ilya plays wing, like mentioned about All-Stars in that bed convo w Sveta)

The two of them coming back to the bench after a shift and immediately starting to explain what they saw at the exact same time. "The weak-side D keeps cheating—" "I know, if we swing lower—" Neither of them stops talking. Somehow they're still having the same conversation.

Every winger they've ever played with eventually develops the same thousand-yard stare while Shane and Ilya spend an entire TV timeout discussing a faceoff they already won three minutes ago.

On The Ice

The thing about Shane being able to look completely bored while doing something physically absurd. Ilya being one of the only people who's ever been able to tell the difference between Shane coasting and Shane being fully locked in because he's spent years reading him from the other bench.

Now he reads him from the same bench. At some point Ilya realizes he can tell whether Shane is nervous by whether his right leg is bouncing. Shane is Hockey Jesus and therefore never nervous about himself, obviously. But teammates doing stupid shit? Suddenly the leg is going.

Shane automatically skates over to grab the extra guy after every scrum because nobody gets to cross-check Ilya except him.

The first month they accidentally keep ending up in the same support lane in the neutral zone. Both of them trying to do the responsible center thing on the breakout, swinging to provide an outlet, reading the same play developing and arriving in the same spot. One goes low to support the defenseman. The other is already there. It takes a month of bumping into each other before they stop thinking the exact same thought at the exact same time.

pThe breakout where Ilya is supposed to be the outlet but gets tied up on the wall. He manages to free one arm and taps his stick twice on the ice. Don't go middle. Go wide. Shane reads it instantly.

At some point they've developed an entire private language of stick taps that nobody else understands.

When the power play isn't working, they have entire conversations between whistles that are maybe thirty percent words and seventy percent stick taps, glove grabs, shoulder shoves, and pointing at patches of ice.

The Ovi-Backstrom thing, neither of them is permanently Ovi and neither of them is permanently Backstrom. Some shifts Shane is the shooter. Some shifts Ilya is. Some shifts they're both trying to set the other guy up. Figuring out who's who isn't really a system so much as a running conversation.

Shane pinching at the blue line, which coaches have spent his entire life trying to discourage. Ilya rotating back to cover before Shane has fully committed to the pinch. Making the decision for him before he's made it himself.

The first time they line up together for a defensive-zone draw and Ilya casually puts a hand on Shane's back and shifts him six inches to the right. It's not even a weird thing. Players reposition each other all the time. Shane still short-circuits because nobody has ever moved him before. He's always been the one directing traffic.

Shane taking a defensive-zone draw because it's on his strong side. Ilya automatically drifting to the wing. No discussion, no ego, just both of them recognizing what gives them the best chance to win possession.

Which is maybe the strangest thing about them. They've both spent their entire lives being THE centerman. The guy the play runs through. The guy who takes the draw. The guy who decides. And now they keep finding themselves yielding little pieces of territory to each other without even thinking about it.

They both tap their sticks on the ice in the exact same rhythm before a faceoff. Someone points it out. They deny it with suspicious speed. (They are the Exact Same People It's Creepy).

Both of them mutter constantly during games. To themselves. To the puck. To nobody. For years they did it from opposite benches. Now they're muttering at each other halfway through shifts, sometimes English, sometimes Russian, and their wingers genuinely cannot tell whether they're communicating or just happening simultaneously.

The line change where Shane is jumping over the boards and Ilya is coming off and for one second they have to occupy the exact same piece of ice. A hand on an elbow. A shove at the hip, crawling over each other. Alternatively, one of them trying to get on the bench where the other is already sitting, and like missing a little, so now Shane's dragging Ilya over the railing by the back of his jersey like a feral alley cat

Shane bodychecking Ilya into the boards during practice and then immediately grabbing his jersey to make sure he's still upright.

Ilya scores goals that look psychic because he knows where Shane is going before Shane does. The back-door tap-in where Shane hasn't even looked at him yet and Ilya is already there, stick on the ice, because he read Shane's shoulder angle and knew the pass was coming. Shane doesn't even have to find him. Ilya is just always in the right place because he's been studying Shane longer than Shane has been studying himself.

Goals / Celebrations

The goal celebration where Shane grabs Ilya's face in both hands and shakes it around viciously.

The chest bump that turns into Ilya holding him there for half a second longer than necessary because they're both laughing too hard.

When one of them gets named first star, the other immediately interrupts the interview by spraying him with a water bottle

Shane grabbing the back of Ilya's helmet and shaking it the way you'd ruffle someone's hair if the helmet wasn't there.

After wins Ilya getting Shane in a headlock and dragging him halfway across the ice.

Video / Meetings

The video session where the coaches are breaking down Ilya's one-timer and Shane keeps quietly finishing the explanation because he's spent years trying to defend against it. Ilya turning around to stare at him. Everyone else in the room already grinning, Shane having absolutely no idea what is funny.

Shane flicking the back of Ilya's helmet every time he says something stupid during film review.

Both of them are notorious video guys, which means they keep accidentally finding themselves alone in the video room after practice. At some point they stop pretending it's an accident.

a few ways this could happen, but chiefly of which i imagined: injury scenario, quite possibly the concussion from cliff. shane drugged up and loopy when ilya visits him in the hospital waxing poetic abt how ilya is so nice and shane loves how he always has mangos for him because no one ELSE lets him have mangos (big pouty shane face here). and ilya is like. why does no one let you have mangos shane. and loopy filterless shane is just like oh yeah because im allergic! not BAD allergic but my mouth gets tingly and kind of burny for a while and sometimes i get hives. but its worth itttttt. and ilya TRAUMATIZED is like no it is NOT WORTH IT. i have been poisoning you??? for Months????? he is SO betrayed. this could also happen later, not during the concussion, but during some other injury incident during the post-cottage pre-tlg gap, where ilya is caring for a loopy shane for whatever reason and the secret gets out-- which draws out the length of time ilya has been spoiling shane with mangoes AND thus increases the level of betrayal/guilt on ilya's part.

option three is that it comes out during Dinner With Mama And Papa Hollander during their time at the cottage... not that first meal maybe but the dinner the next day. like, as a fun anecdote yuna and david bring up shane's allergy to mangos and how it was DETRIMENTAL as a kid because he loved them so much it took them so long to realize he was allergic, and even after he'd always find ways to run off to get his mango fix, haha ... wait ilya whats wrong why arent you laughing. meanwhile shane (whose attempts to shut his parents up with increasingly wide eyed Looks all failed) is thousand-yard-staring like a dog who got into the pantry and ilya is just LOOKING AT HIM. like. shane. shane is there something you would like to tell me. were you ever GOING to tell me. or were you just going to let me KEEP POISONING YOU for the REST OF OUR LIVES . look at me shane LOOK INTO MY EYES. and he's just having a whole crisis realizing he was made an unwilling agent in shane's mango-eating agenda... (though there is A bonus point in the form of: ilya's EXTREME distress over accidentally poisoning his situationship-boyfriend-soulmate endear him very much to yuna and david. shane's going "its a really mild allergy ilya its fine!" and ilya, going through the five stages of grief preemptively, is half-yelling back at him "WELL IT MAY NOT STAY MILD IF YOU KEEP FUCKING EATING THEM. YOU KNOW HOW ALLERGIES WORK SHANE YOU HAVE MANY OTHERS WHY DO YOU DO THIS" and yuna and david are like oh .... he Loves Him... our baby's in good hands ❤️)

anyways i hope u enjoy this humble contribution to the shallergies posting 🙇

oh my GOD

it's an attempted playful callback to the vodka being his reward in vegas, and shane is a little more honest by this point and is just *makes a face before he can stop it* make it something i actually want.

and ilya still trying to be playful is just "oh? and what do you want, hollander?" and HE'S kind of playing at going for a round 2, but shane is blissed out and is honest anyway so just *wistful sigh*

"mango"

and ilya obviously is fucking delighted because this is so Classic Hollander. he's going for sex and hollander?? is thinking of mangoes?? okay, you bizarre person. ilya must have you carnally once more.

and the next time they meet up, ilya has remembered this and is being playful when he offers up a mango (100% just playing it like a bit), but shane is genuinely visibly delighted before he can stop himself. he doesn't buy them for himself because obvi he knows they're bad for him

...but...if he didn't buy it...it would be rude...to NOT eat it... :) oh no :) guess he has to eat this mango :)

BUT it continues being a joke that shane only gets his mango after sex, WHICH MEANS! ILYA HAS NEVER BEEN AROUND FOR THE AFTER OF SHANE EXPERIENCING A REACTION TO THIS GAME. HE DOESN'T KNOW.

and shane like. logically knows he should probably say something, but atp it would feel awkward being like, "soooo by the way, i'm allergic to this so you should probably like. stop." and he also doesn't want to risk being rude/making ilya stop wanting to be playful with him or seeing him because he made it weird. and he's SO disciplined all the time. ALL THE TIME. he is SO disciplined.

buuuuut if he's already indulging in this with rozanov...really...what's being a little itchy for a day or so with a rare mango treat. it's not like they meet up THAT often. and this is for SURE the last time so it doesn't matter. it's for SURE the last time. NO more. for SURE no more. last fuck last mango.

...for SURE.

.........after the NEXT one-

and by the time they get to the cottage, like. shane knows he's going to have to tell him. but there's priorities above and beyond The Sex Mangoes between them, and ilya had to cross an international border so it's not like he brought any with him, and shane obviously doesn't have any in the cottage. so like. that can be a Later conversation.

...except for the fact where they're talking to yuna and david about them as a couple and ilya says something offhand to a question about their relationship to the effect of, "just mango by mango" meaning it to be like. playful and sweet and nudge nudge at them having a cutesy couple thing.

but shane who can FEEL both of his parents look to him sharply is just

and shane’s just fucking hiding the biggest boner of his life

- How the word 'Ibiza' is pronounced

- Whether or not silicone-based lubricant counts as a liquid vis a vis CATSA regulations

- Whether or not it is acceptable for Ilya to free up suitcase space by not packing underwear

- A recurring argument that is now simply known as the Skin Cancer Fight, which resulted in the purchase of four different bottles of sunscreen.

- Ilya wants to wear coordinating outfits so that they can do the Pink and White fit check TikTok meme. Shane tells him with his mouth that this is stupid and secretly wants to do it so badly that he emails his stylist from 2017.

- No Ilya Anya cannot come to Spain (x8)

- Ilya hides Shane's neck pillow because he wants Shane to use him as a pillow. Shane buys a new one at the airport and Ilya doesn't speak to him for an hour (Gives up eventually because he's bored.)

- "Hollander, I don't think CATSA will care enough to search your bag unless the butt plug is shaped like bomb--" "Ilya you can't say that word in a fucking airport--"

- Flavor of gum to chew to make their ears pop on the plane.

- Ilya spends the entire month pre-honeymoon on a relentless campaign to convince Shane to join the mile high club. Shane ducks and weaves like his fucking life depends on it until they get into a whisper-shout argument about it on Shane's parents' back porch the night before they leave. Argument ends when Shane snaps, "Of course I think it would be hot!" and Ilya laughs for so long he has to sit down.

- Does a very quick and silent handjob underneath a blanket in the back row of first class count as joining the mile high club? A debate that gives them a good hour of entertainment.

- Shane does not want to go to a nude beach. Ilya thinks that this is because he's a prude (he's fucking not) and they argue about that (He undresses in front of twenty other guys for a living Ilya.) until Shane admits that he's worried about how jealous it will make him when Ilya's insane ass is inevitably the star of the show on the gay nude beach.

- "I did not think you noticed these things, lyubimyy." "Fuck you, I may be a bottom but I'm still a man and I'm not fucking blind--" (New Argument+)

- "How was I supposed to know that hair mousse counts as liquid?? Is not liquid when it comes out! Is mousse."

- Argument that is triggered when Shane realizes that Ilya has been keeping him occupied with stupid silly spats so that he doesn't make himself insane with anxiety over the continued fallout from events pre-wedding until they are in a private villa on the Mediterranean Sea about a million miles from anyone who cares about hockey.

-

It's nice, not having to get up and run out of the room immediately after they're done fucking.

The hotel room sheets are rumpled, Rozanov - Ilya - lying on top of them with his arm outstretched while Shane rests his head on his shoulder.

"I missed this," Shane admits, saying it so quietly that it barely comes out.

"Did you now?" Ilya asks, and Shane can hear the smirk in his voice.

"Fuck off," Shane laughs, reaching across his body to poke Ilya in the ribs. Ilya catches his wrist, wrestling him back down. It's light, playful. They're too tired from their first round of sex, anyway.

Eventually, they end up facing each other, Shane on his back, Ilya half-hovering above him, still lightly holding his wrist. Ilya softens his grip, and their hands slide together, palm to palm. Ilya's palm is warm and a little sweaty, but not unpleasantly so.

Shane can't help but stare at their joined hands.

Sometimes, girls wanted to do this, compare hand sizes. Inevitably, it always ended with the girl delighted about how much bigger Shane's hand was than hers.

It made Shane sad, for a second, that his hand was still bigger now, his palm slightly larger than Ilya's, his fingers a bit longer. Rozanov had big hands, strong, manly. Still, Shane's were larger.

"My hand's bigger than yours." It came out embarrassingly... pouty. Shane wanted... Shane had no idea what he wanted.

Ilya could pick him up, could lift him onto a kitchen counter, could carry him into his bedroom and toss him onto the sheets like he weighed nothing. Ilya could hold him down, could manhandle him here and there until Shane was a moaning, squirming mess, spreading his legs and arching his back just the way Ilya wanted him to.

That was what Shane wanted.

"Huh?" Ilya replied, voice dreamy.

"Our hands. Yours is smaller than mine." Shane repeated. When he looked up, Ilya's pupils were blown wide.

"Oh." Sounding dreamy still. "Yeah."

A second of silence passed between them.

Then, Ilya shifted on top of Shane, and Shane gasped. "Are you seriously hard again?!"

Ilya laughed, letting his head fall forward. It was so intimate, to see him like this, to have him smiling and laughing in bed, and Shane couldn't help but laugh, too.

"Did the hand size thing get you hard?"

"Yes, Hollander, fuck," Ilya admitted, "Is kind of hot, no?"

"My big hands?" Shane rolled his eyes.

"Yes, big hands for my big cock," Ilya said with a shit-eating grin.

"You're the worst."