Grief is inevitable. In the many years and lifetimes that Gavin has lived through, he knew that fact through and through.
The love of his life, his Freelancer, had passed with a soft content smile in his arms. Seventy years had passed since he first met them.
He saw their youth and was with them every step as they aged - they always looked beautiful no matter what. He tried to reflect that in his own appearance too, after catching the way that their eyes would flicker in pain whenever they caught their reflection in the mirror next to his. He loved aging together with them, even if his own evidence of the passing of time on his face was artificial. He revelled in the way their smile lines were so deep with every passing year, and his heart was filled with warmth at the realisation that he caused it. Heβd rarely seen them without a smile, after all.
They knew their end was nearing, and asked for him to stay with them, lying in bed in their home. He gently wrapped them in his arms and listened to the slow, weak beating of their heart. Even now, they had a smile on their face. They reached a shaking hand up to his face, and caressed it. A single tear fell from their eye.
βI didnβt know love until I met you.β They whispered. Gavin felt like he couldnβt breathe.
Their eyes sparkled with love until their last breath.
He thought he knew grief after the inversion. But this was different. It consumed him - his mind, his body, his every thought and breath. It felt wrong not to have the warmth of their body pressed to him. It felt wrong to have his core so empty, dull without the taste of love radiating from them. He looked at his aged face in the mirror and couldnβt recognise himself. Who was he without his Freelancer? How did he live before he met them?
Months and years passed. He wandered around aimlessly, feeding the bare minimum amount needed to survive, although he didnβt really know if there was a point anymore. He had altered his appearance back to what it was before he met Freelancer, hoping it would help him move on.
He was stupid to think he ever could. He doesnβt want to.
He wandered into the nearby 7-11 and went through the motions. He only feeds once every month or two now. The lonely man he chose as his βmealβ was now sucking him off - it was quite a poor effort, but Gavin couldnβt care any less.
The doors opened, setting off that annoying jingle that played throughout the store. The person walked in, slowly browsing through each aisle before picking up a cup and filling it with a slurpee.
Gavinβs head snapped up when he heard the sound of a cup dropping. Shit. He thought heβd cloaked them. He mustβve gotten rusty.
The same eyes. The same energy pulsing through their core. They looked a little different - different eye colour, younger, and their features rounder than before, but Gavin was sure.
The moment they locked eyes, theirs wide in shock and cheeks reddening in embarrassment, he tasted it. Gods. That sweet warmth of their desire.
And of course theyβd ask for directions in the midst of this awkward situation.
Gavin couldnβt help but cry.
In that moment he realised,
He found his way back into their heart quite easily, for he knew every part of them intimately, both inside and out. Although their physical body had changed a little, he revelled in being able to explore this new side of them, relearning their sensitive areas. He was beyond pleased to feel their affection for him exceed lust - of course it did. This was his Freelancer, after all. The same kindhearted, loving Freelancer.
He could feel their core, a little fearful but determined and pure with affection, reaching out to him. They confessed that they loved him, and were awaiting his answer with shaking hands and the nervous pounding of their heart. Their eyes teared up, overwhelmed by the excitement of the prospect that he might love them back, but also the fear that he might reject them.
He immediately took them in his embrace and kissed them, deep. He felt whole again. He felt alive. He tasted their love, now unrestrained, and melted at how sweet and familiar it was. He was home again. They smiled through their happy tears and whispered;
βI didnβt know love until I met you.β
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