remake of this gifset

If I’m somewhere where there are Educational Personell (Museum Docents, Q&A zookeepers, Park Rangers, Public School Teachers, Professors etc.) I have a question I like to ask them:

“What’s the weirdest question someone’s ever asked you?”

I say weird and not Dumb becuase even buckwild questions can have important answers, but whoever I ask it too usually has to think about it for a bit, then comes out with something different every time.  And I love every single answer becuase it just warms my heart out there to know people are trying to understand the world a bit better, no matter how limited thier starting point. A collection of favorites so far:

Art Museum Host: “A man once asked me “Can you help me find someone and if you can’t can you find someone who can?”  Which I always thought would be a great title for an Artwork.”

Park Ranger: “I’m so glad the Japanese couple asked me “Is bear spray like mosquito spray and it goes on the jacket, or on the bear?” instead of just trying it.”

Zookeeper: “A man once pointed at the live red-tailed hawk I had out for a demo and asked me “Aren’t those extinct?” We eventually figured out he meant “Endangered” but I hear that question every time I see a redtail now.”

Primary School Teacher: “About every other year a student asks me what part of the school I sleep in at night, because clearly I live here.  I tell them I sleep under the bleachers in the gym but it’s actually the Nurse’s office.”

Professor: “A student asked me “So how do I use this in a conversation when my aunt is wine-drunk at thanksgiving and being a jerk again?” Which honestly is a fair question about philosophy and really changed how I teach rhetoric.”

Natural History Docent: “A woman once asked me what the difference between a Million and a Billion was.  Kinda pieced together that she’d just left her church for her safety, and was learning about Earth’s Natural History for the first time. Nobody else was there because it had been snowing, so I walked her through the Hall Of Time and answered as many questions as I could.  She was bewildered, but really trying. It always struck me as a really brave thing, to try to understand all of that while fresh out of a dangerous situation. I hope it helped.”

Forensic Scientist:  “People ask me how to commit murder all the time, but if you really hate someone, stealing thier identity causes much more suffering and is a lot harder to get caught at. A guy did ask me if working at a body farm was creepy and did not like that it was ok until you learned that decayed human fingers are a deer’s favorite midwinter snack.”

Zookeeper: “People call us becuase they think they’ve found an escaped animal all the time, or they think they’re neighbor’s husky is a wolf. One guy asked me if his dog was part hyena because it had spots. But that one guy really did have a Tiger in his toolshed that one time so we try to take them seriously.”

Meteorologist: “A guy once emailed me about how hard you’d have to fan a tornado to make it start spinning in the other direction and included a picture of him holding up a box fan at an approaching tornado.  We printed it out for the work fridge.”

Park Ranger: “I was giving a talk on the Yellowstone Supervolcano and a guy asked if, after it errupted, the earth would be ‘hollowed out’.  I suppose I was just relieved that he understand that the earth isn’t flat.”

Primarcy Shcool teacher: “A student once asked me where she could sell her bones online so she could by a dog.  Which? Same.”

1. The End- Easily the best opening track to an album I’ve ever heard. The slow start followed by the hugely theatric guitar and vocals and the sheer passion put into every lyric, the glory of every lyric!!! “I’d encourage your smiles, I’ll expect you won’t cry!” Going right into those HUGE POWERFUL CHORDS... legendary. You know you’re in for a show.

2. Dead!- THE SEAMLESS TRANSITION FROM THE END INTO AN INCREDIBLY DIFFERENT STYLE OF SONG!!!! This is such a good fuck you song. Fr you can go SO SO hard with this one. The third verse is especially TASTY... but what’s even TASTIER is the BLUESY GUITAR SOLO AFTERWARDS AND THEN!! AND THEN!!! LA LA LA LA LA, LA LA LA LA LA LA, LA LA LA LA LA LA LAAAAA!! WHAT A STUNNING SONG!! WHAT A MASTERPIECE!! THIS SONG ABOUT BEING LIFELESS IS SO SO FULL OF LIFE

3. This is How I Disappear- God the guitar in the beginning here. The emotion it evokes in me is absolutely INSANE!! BATSHIT!! And then the verses.... hoo boy.. I feel like a sexy little corpse writhing out of the dirt when I hear the verse.. and the chorus is EQUALLY AMAZING BUT!! Nothing comes close in this song to the third verse.. the soft vocals and the harmonies but THEN.. THEN!!! “SO I CANT HURT YOU ANYMOREEEEEEE” INTO!!!! “YOU WANNA SEE HOW! FAR! DOWWN! I CAN SINK!! LET ME GO!! FUCK!!” Holy shit. The rest of the song is flawless obvs

4. The Sharpest Lives- One of my top ten favorite mcr songs. Literally this song is so hard to describe because every single facet of it is SO SO SO SO GOOD!! My favorite thing about this one is definitely the lyrics(the music is INCREDIBLE TOO)!! I mean “Juliet loves a beat and the lust it commands, drop the dagger and lather the blood on your hands, Romeo” GOES SO SO FUCKING HARD!! LIKE YES!! I ABSOLUTELY WILL LATHER THE BLOOD ON MY HANDS THANK YOU VERY MUCH!! I DO LOVE THIS BEAT AND THE LUST IT COMMANDS THANK YOU!!! The harmonies throughout are so so so satisfying to hear and the guitar in the third verse paired with the notes from a faint choir in the background. God.

5. Welcome to the Black Parade- There’s a reason this is mcr’s most popular song. Because it’s REALLY FUCKING GOOD!! It’s not in my top ten but it’s still an EXCELLENTLY PUT TOGETHER SONG! It takes you on a whole journey. This is mcr’s bohemian rhapsody. This song makes you want to live through any tough shit you’re going through. Every mcr song has saved lives, this one has saved the most.

6. I Don’t Love You- Straight up this is a song to cry to. This is a tragic song with a chord progression that feels like what saying goodbye REALLY feels like. It perfectly puts that bittersweet feeling into song and you can feel it deep in the pit of your stomach and the bottom of your heart when you hear it. As simple as the chorus is, it’s incredibly impactful. There’s a confidence in the delivery that veils the absolute pain within the line, “when you go, would you even turn to say, ‘I don’t love you like I did yesterday’”. That pain leaks out in the third verse when Gerard sings through gritted teeth and the lyrics change to “would you have the guts to say” you can physically feel the frustration and the pain in that delivery and it’s stunning.

7. House of Wolves- DO I EVEN HAVE TO GET INTO WHY THIS SONG FUCKS?? THIS SONG IS ABOUT HAVING A HUMILIATION KINK AND FRANK WROTE IT. OFC ITS GONNA BE BALLS TO THE WALLS BONKERS AND INCREDIBLE!! HELL YEAH!!! TELL ME IM A BAD, BAD, BAD, BAD MAN!!!!!!!!!

8. Cancer- Some of Gerard Way’s best vocals literally ever!!! A strong tonal shift from house of wolves— this song isn’t written like most songs about death. This song is about acceptance and coming to piece with the unknown of death and the side effects of treatments that only prolong your misery, realizing that the hardest thing is going to be leaving your loved ones behind. This is really an “it be like that sometimes” song and it’s executed flawlessly!!!

9. Mama- In my opinion, this is the best mcr song(Boy Division comes in very close second but we aren’t talking abt her rn). Every single thing about this song is so. Just. Wow. It’s my favorite song and I could never verbally describe how it makes me feel. The transition from polka to waltz. Wow. The waltz bit at the end of the song is legit the coolest shit I’ve ever heard and it makes me feel like I WILL return from the ashes

10. Teenagers- THIS was the first mcr song little 6th grade me heard and I was immediately hooked!!! What’s not to love about this song?? It’s a nice break from all the sad shit going on to be like by the way, teenagers suck and cliques are awful. This is mcr begging all of their young and impressionable listeners to not become preps.

11. Disenchanted- This song is similar to I Don’t Love You because it gives the listener a smiliar nostalgic feeling. It’s like going through the best memories of your life before your inevitable demise that you’ve finally accepted. You’re leaning in to the memories and realizing how insignificant everything really is. It’s tragic but in a way, it’s comforting. Everything ends for everyone at some point or another. Also the guitar riff is really nice!! Simple and sweet!!

12. Famous Last Words- This song has saved so many lives. The absolute power in this song, the power in rising up against all odds and living through loss. This is a song about mourning but it’s also very much about strength. The power in the lyrics and the vocals send chills through my whole body every time I hear this song, no matter how many times I’ve heard it before. “Cause I see you lyin’ next to me, with words I thought I’d never speak, awake and unafraid,” AND THEN AND THEN AND THEN!! “ASLEEP OR DEEEEEEEEAAAAAD!!!!!” LIKE. HOLY SHIT. HOLY SHIT. AND BACK INTO THE CHORUS WITH “OR DEEEAD” STILL IN THE BACKGROUND!!! “I AM NOT AFRAID TO KEEP ON LIVING! I AM NOT AFRAID TO WALK THIS WORLD ALONE! HONEY, IF YOU STAY I’LL BE FORGIVEN, NOTHING YOU CAN SAY CAN STOP ME GOING HOME!!” THIS COULD GET ME THROUGH ANYTHING!!! THE POWER OF IT!! IS ABSOLUTELY INSANE!!!

1) I'm a Big Dude. Two packets of ramen is a meal for me - four if I'm especially, unusually hungry, but that's done in two servings with a gap in time as I consume one and then prepare the other. Seven in one sitting is impressive, and a little scary since one package is honestly more sodium than someone should eat in a day, even if it was your only source.