Shipping In The Middle Ages

Here, have almost 2000 words of platonic Captain Charming soulmates for Captain Charming Friday, because this is apparently what I do when I should be working.  For the CCF crew: @spartanguard, @kat2609, @nfbagelperson, @gusenitsaa, and everyone else that agrees this is the best day of the week.

Please excuse any grammar/spelling mistakes, as this was written quickly and posted without proper editing.

—-

David was born with an anchor on his shoulder.

              He also had a compass on his wrist, one that matched Snow’s perfectly, though hers was on her ankle.  The day Emma was born, that compass became entwined with a swan, because children and parents were always destined to be soulmates, though sometimes those marks were more a weight than a gift.

              (David should know – the star that was his father’s mark, the one entwined with the heart of his mother’s mark, is on the back of his neck, and it feels like a constant burn, a constant weight, and if he could remove it, he would.)

              But it was the anchor that remained a mystery for him.

              It wasn’t entirely unheard of, of course, to have marks other than those of your significant other and family.  After all, soulmates came in a myriad of forms.  But David had lived almost thirty years (plus twenty-eight in a curse induced coma), and the matching owner of that anchor still remained a mystery, something that was almost unheard of.

You traded your ship for me?

Ted Lasso Finale + parallels

By mjhudsonberry on tiktok!

summary: David and Killian decide to see who can grow a better beard in the face of a crisp Maine winter. Their wives are absolutely not complaining.

a/n: MERRY CHRISTMAS, FRIENDS!! (and warm tidings of the season to all, whatever holidays you celebrate!) This is just a bit of Captain Charming silliness—because Christmas does fall on a Friday, after all ;) —with a side of Snowing & CS steaminess. The idea started over the summer when @annytecture​ and I were losing our minds over Josh Dallas’s lockdown beard, but it didn’t go anywhere until recently when both he and Colin O’Donoghue were revealed to be rocking some thicker-than-normal facial hair. Thanks to @optomisticgirl​ for looking it over!! Hope you enjoy, and hope you all are having a lovely and safe holiday season!

rated M | 2k words

December 3

December rolled into Storybrooke on the back of the first arctic blast of the season. The town was covered in a blanket of white, and temperatures dropped well below freezing in a matter of days. It was typical for Maine, of course, though it somehow always caught them by surprise.

David and Killian had been tasked with clearing the main sidewalks through town—an easily arduous task, but with the chill, still required them to bundle up in thick coats and scarves. They worked as far as Granny’s before popping in for a respite from the biting air. 

Inside, they made a beeline for the counter and collapsed on adjacent stools while they took off all their excess outerwear. Despite his thick wool hat, the pointed tips of Killian’s ears were still pink, as were David’s cheeks; Granny’s arrival with two steaming mugs of cocoa couldn’t have been more perfectly timed. (Killian managed to shake enough feeling into his fingers to dig out his flask and add a bit of rum to both cups; Granny yelled that she “saw that, you scoundrel!” But she laughed it off.)

They clinked their mugs together in a toast—to what, neither knew—and took long draws each, immediately feeling a bit less frosty. 

“I take it it’s cold out there?” Granny asked sarcastically. “This is the first time I haven’t seen your chest hair in months, Jones,” she teased. 

“Have to protect the treasures from the elements, don’t we?” he winked back. 

David rolled his eyes, but chuckled. “That’s the true sign of winter here: Captain Hook buttons his shirt.”

They all shared a laugh, but Killian did have to admit: “I’m not sure I’ve experienced colder air ever—and I got stuck in Arendelle one winter.”

“Yeah; we’d get storms like this in the Enchanted Forest, but never this biting.” David ran a hand over his wind-chapped cheeks, trying to rub some feeling back into them. 

A snort sounded from the other end of the counter. “Babies.”

They both turned to look at Leroy, who had apparently overheard their conversation—and had some thoughts on it. 

“Pray tell, dwarf—are you not affected by subzero temperatures somehow?” Killian tossed over. 

“Not as much as you, no. But I’m also not running around here with a face as bare as a baby’s ass. Grow a beard and stop bitching.”

With that, he downed the rest of his coffee in one gulp and, living up to his name, grumpily shuffled off and out into the tundra. 

“I don’t know why I’m ever surprised when he acts like that,” David observed. 

“Nor do I. But he does have a point—facial hair helps quite a bit. Me and my crew, we’d always let it fill in on colder trips. Especially that season in Arendelle.”

David tilted his head to give Killian a side-eyed glance. “I’m trying to imagine you with a full Viking beard, but it’s not happening.”

“If it’s any consolation, I can’t picture you with any more than patchy stubble.”

David was offended. “Hey, I can grow a beard!” 

“Prove it, then,” Killian challenged, arching his eyebrow over a sip from his mug.

Mama Rose in heaven: If you don't get off my piano right this instance I swear to God.

me: explain this then 

me:

Home Alone 6: Finding David 

(for those who don’t know, Moira Rose was the mom in Home Alone!)