KarlMoose

That’s what every black person needs to do. 

A lot of Pokemon in Gen 1 were based on animals only in very superficial ways, whereas a lot of recent Pokemon are very explicitly, unmistakably inspired by real live animals

For example, here’s the Gen 1 versions of a frog, a bear, and a mole

And here’s the Gen 5 versions of a frog, a bear, and a mole

lumpy boy. displeasing color. disgusting gradient shading as usual. the trademark soulless stare of an apple brand emoji. not feeling this bear. 1/5

beautiful round friend. perfect boy. scientifically, nothing wrong with this bear. google giving us the crowd pleaser as usual. 5/5 perfect score

i wasn’t sure whether i should even include this one. like is this a fucking lion or what? weak. get bill gates’s artsy garbage out of my sight. 0/5

perfectly acceptable boy. cuteness makes up for lazy gradient shading and unfortunate color palette. a bear i can get behind. 4/5

he’s shiny and he’s doing his best but i just cannot get over that mouth. who looked at this and though ‘yes these are a bear’s correct and actual proportions’ 2/5 why the long face

scheming. plotting. good colors, clean lines. i love this bear but i do not trust him. 3/5 he :3c

i just… dont know, my man. they made it just realistic enough to teeter on the edge of uncanny valley. that mouth. those eyes. this bear feels pain. free him. 1/5

the friendliest boy. the sweetest boy. the fluffiest boy. this bear is always welcome in my circle of friends. 5/5 another perfect boy

this one looks like some kind of weird dog but it’s not as bad as microsoft’s. i’ll give it a pass but it’s treading on thin ice. 3/5

highly superior execution of apple’s lumpy boy. clean lines. good face. i support this young man 4/5

this is such a rude portrayal of these sweet sweet boys. let him smile. let him know love. 1/5

To continue answer security question: “Where and how will you die?”

types in “alone in a ditch wearing a clown costume”

Everybody: 

musical lineup: Beyoncé, Mary J. Blige, Jon Bon Jovi, Garth Brooks, Sheryl Crow, Renée Fleming, Caleb Green, Josh Groban, Herbie Hancock, Heather Headley, Bettye Lavette, John Legend, John Mellencamp, Jennifer Nettles, Pete Seeger, Shakira, Bruce Springsteen, James Taylor, U2, Usher, will.i.am and Stevie Wonder.

recitations: Jack Black, Steve Carell, Rosario Dawson, Jamie Foxx, Tom Hanks, Samuel L. Jackson, Ashley Judd, Martin Luther King III, Queen Latifah, Laura Linney, George Lopez, Kal Penn, Marisa Tomei, Denzel Washington, Forest Whitaker and Tiger Woods.

kid’s event: Bow Wow, Miley Cyrus, Demi Lovato, Jamie Foxx, the Jonas Brothers, Queen Latifah and Usher

Bill Clinton’s 1st inauguration (1993)

musical lineup: Gerald Albright, Kathleen Battle, Tony Bennett, Ruben Blades, Michael Bolton, Michael Brecker, Mary-Chapin Carpenter, Ray Charles, Melissa Etheridge, Aretha Franklin, James Ingram, Ben E. King, Dave Koz, LL Cool J, Yo-Yo Ma, Bobby McFerrin, Gerry Mulligan, Kenny Rogers, Smokey Robinson, Diana Ross, David Sanborn, Sax Jam Group, Tom Scott, Jon Secada, Sounds of Blackness, Stephen Stills, Luther Vandross, Dionne Warwick, Grover Washington Jr, Kirk Whalum, Bebe & Cece Winans and Trisha Yearwood

recitations: Harry Belafonte, Ted Danson, Whoopi Goldberg, James Earl Jones, Jack Nicholson, Sidney Poitier.