@kapitan-hurma - Tumblr Blog

When you get 65 views on an extremely rarepair fic and just want to say: hello?? talk to me about it?? please??

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akwardsilince

Person A: "You're my weakness, you know."

Person B: "Don't say that aloud. Someone might overhear and use that information against you."

Person A: "Oh? But it's just the two of us here."

Person B: "You think I wouldn't use your weakness against you?"

Person A: "I look forward to it, actually."

#emralt

Typing a character’s name into the search bar and seeing your own stupid posts is pure cringe

northernolddragon

King and Navigator.

Yet another Emralt idea (sorry lmao)

Emhyr sets off on a diplomatic mission to the North with a convoy, bringing Geralt along as an escort — because no matter how well-trained his Impera brigade is, they know nothing about the nuances of fighting monsters should any cross their path. The imperial soldiers are none too pleased that a witcher has access to what are practically state secrets. During a long layout caused by a snowstorm, Emhyr orders that Geralt be given a proper tent and that all his demands be met. Paying no heed to anyone, the witcher walks into the imperial pavilion as if he owns the place (in reality, they’re just playing Gwent).

Out of sheer boredom, the soldiers start spreading raunchy rumors about Emhyr’s private life during their evening drinking sessions — whispering that this special treatment toward the mutant is no accident, that the Emperor hasn’t had a woman in a long time, and that it gets pretty cold inside that pavilion. Unfortunately for them, Geralt overhears the conversation and slides into a seat at their table. Seeing their borderline panicked expressions, the witcher decides to have some fun and chimes into the chat with highly suggestive remarks about Emhyr, leaving the soldiers completely bewildered.

Later, during their routine evening game of Gwent, Geralt, barely holding back his laughter, lets slip that the soldiers in the camp are so bored they’re already climbing into their sovereign’s bed. Outraged, Emhyr resolves to root out the instigators of this nonsense. Little did he know that one day, they actually would end up in the same bed, when the storm grew far too fierce, and the brazier was no longer enough to keep them warm. As for the camp rumors, which felt unrealistic even to the ones who made them up, nobody actually believed them, making it the perfect cover.

#emhyr var emreis #emhyr x geralt #geralt of rivia #emralt #the witcher #emralt headcanons

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feyspeaker

Geralt & Roach ♥ this is the main print for the Geralt themed print club this month! join here before 3/31: link

sde1210

亲亲

这个色差对吗😱

#such a great idea

ir7770

omaano

I feel like I need to point out that no witchers were permanently harmed in the process of making this painting...

Happy (belated) Birthday @do-androids-dream-ao3acc (this is the... almost maximum angst-related thing I'm willing to do, just for you) and also happy birthday to me. I missed painting blood *sigh* I absolutely loved spending an hour painting Emhyr's hand only to smear it fully in red and undo all my hard work in 10 minutes QnQ

beardof

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drenched-in-sunlight

my annoying Emperor / Witcher cannot be that cute….

tigerlyla-of-metinna

They finally see each other, eye to eye

To all my friends who love this ship!

Photo shot by @eycsnow666, and my Ps alterations.

tigerlyla-of-metinna

Gwent Battle: Ciri vs. Morvran

Morvran: How much do we wager, Princess? Twenty florens? Thirty?

Ciri: Please! I am to be crowned empress. I do not need more money than what the imperial treasury provides. Let's make this more exciting!

Ciri: We will play for keeping our clothes on. Loser strips off an article of clothing!

Morvran: .... are you sure you are up to the task? It would be embarrassing for the emperors' daughter to run around stark naked.

Ciri: What's the matter, General? Scared that I will have you take all your clothes off or afraid to see me naked?

Morvran: ........ I do not back away from a challenge, not even from my future empress. Strip Gwent then.

Ciri: Prepare to lose your knickers, General Voorhis!

THREE HOURS LATER

Ciri: My my! You look ten times better without those ridiculous ruffles. You are as naked as a wild stallion!

Morvran: You are a tougher opponent than I thought, Princess. But I've not admitted defeat yet!

Morvran: One more game. I have nothing on me to wager, but if I win, you will strip all your clothes.

Ciri: and if you lose?

Morvran: Then, my future empress, you may do with me as you please.

Ciri: Tempting! I have just the thing I want to do to you.

Morvran: Let's play. Winner takes all!

MEANWHILE......

Geralt: I hope you did not go too hard on her training, Emhyr. Running an empire is harder than slaying a monster. Ciri is up to picking a sword more to settle disputes than diplomacy.

Emhyr: Ciri is just as capable of cutting down any unruly noble as she is with monsters. She will learn much from me as she did with her grandmother, and you. I've no doubt she'll be a capable ruler in my place.

Ciri: Faster! Faster! Giddiyap!

Morvran: Err, Princess, can we do this in a more pri-

Ciri: Morvran, I won the Gwent wager. You do whatever I want! Be glad I did not demand that you wear a saddle!"

Morvran: B-but-

Ciri: No buts! And stallions do not speak! They neigh and run like the wind!"

Ciri: Hi ho Voorhis! AWAAAAAAAYYYYYY!

Emhyr & Geralt: .......................................

Geralt: I see what you mean, Emhyr.

Emhyr: Glad you agree.

Geralt: I taught her the game.

Emhyr: I gave her my best Nilfgaardian deck.

(photos shot by the talented @i-be-busy-witchering at my request, you genius! Edits in PS and captions by me).

#this made my day somehow 😂

kapitan-hurma

Mentally I’m still here

wintercearig12

You can't forget the follow-up booty call

kapitan-hurma

Geralt is not being subtle at all

omaano

At long last I finally have the first fill for my @witcher-rarepair-summer-bingo and I'm super proud of myself for this

Prompt: Rivals

Relationship(s): Geralt/Emhry and Geralt/Dettlaff

Or: Geralt has a very obvious type, and he's mortified at the realization. (I, on the other hand, had to work out my frustration in art form to properly figure out what makes Emhyr and Dettlaff look actually different)

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Mentally I’m still here

#the witcher #emhyr var emreis #emhyr x geralt #geralt of rivia #emralt

1hypeboy

Not my best work but still a bit proud of this

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