So uh, Ive read a post somewhere about whether we r ready to die or something about when you die how your family members would do with your stuffs. It says we need to have a diary. I want to keep one but then remember I have this. I want to have a paperbook diary but that will be messy. So I do have a planner where I keep my emails and passwords and debts that I have (but some accounts, will be sent to a friend that I already have her number deleted from my list). เซฎ(หถโฅ๏ธฟโฅ)แ
Got upset last night after knowing colleagues went to beraya when she told me she wont be around for lunch (I asked her on Friday to have lunch in KP on Sat but shes at hometown & suggested Sun instead, I refused) n I saw status that other colleague and her went to somewhere near here. It's not their fault, it's not. Im upset and mad that I feel upset about this. I confronted them, one was clueless & thought it was funny, the tuan rmh mentioned how she said she was from her hometown, and her, she said sorry it was a short notice plan.
Humm it's kinda weird that people dont reailizee that I dont go home (my hometown) much now these time around. I prefer my own place. The safest for me. It doesnt drain me, so I want to be here. I dont have one to talk to, but Im here, I feel safe.
and then she wished happy belated birthday. that is out nowhere. ( โน -โน)? traits of guilt. Ive let traces, Ive uploaded pics and videos of me with cake and unboxing gifts (by SL, wearing kebaya by M) for public to see. Nobody said anything. so be it. why now then,. I already decided that it's ok people forget to wish (none of my highschool friends) but when a few at work wished, I realized (again) Ive been forgotten far too many times. I uh birthday wishes is big deal for me. Some may think, most people at this point think it's nothing. But this is the only time I guess I can see if anyone remembers me at all. some argue itt's not the way they show love (The love language) well cant u guys even see? it's the way I see and receive it. so apelah sangat kan nk ingt n actually wish me. It's always me that need to change for others and not them towards me. Learn how people skip way too fast when they see my post/vids.
All my life Ive been good but now Im thinking WTH - Avril Lavigne
AKMU - Paradise of Rumors is out!
and this line "There are things you can only know if you leave"
"There are things you only learn by leaving"
๋ ๋์ผ์ง๋ง ์ ์ ์๋ ๊ฒ ์์ฃ
tteo-na-ya-ji-man al su it-neun ge it-jyo
ps: we sold mak's mesin jahit sulam yesterday, thanks Mr. Hari & abh & kpna for helping.
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