A whole new blog

i hate viruses so fucking much. literally getting attacked by a fucking shape. a concept. consumes no energy. responds to no stimuli. its only existence is to fuck with you. like fuck offf

"🥪" is shorthand for "🍞🧀🍅🥬🍞"

Thank god they decided to make more

But In doing so…she created her biggest enemy…Jolene

the second 'o' in "zoologist" is putting in heavy duty work. girl is working two jobs

i like when i put a little emoticon at the end of my parentheticals (like this ^_^) because it turns it into a messageworm

goo goo dolls if they were in dune: and i don’t want the worm to see me

People don’t even say w00t anymore.

has anyone figured out how to turn off the thing where you love your pet so much it slides inexorably into grief-borrowing

“For me this glass is already broken. I enjoy it; I drink out of it. It holds my water admirably, sometimes even reflecting the sun in beautiful patterns. If I should tap it, it has a lovely ring to it. But when I put this glass on the shelf and the wind knocks it over or my elbow brushes it off the table and it falls to the ground and shatters, I say, ‘Of course.’ When I understand that the glass is already broken, every moment with it is precious.”

A truthberry might make you tell the truth... But a lieberry? A lieberry will loan you books