friendly hermit crab

yeah it sucked getting bullied in middle school but nothing hurts worse then creating a tik tok account and the algorithm figuring out my demographic is depressed bitch in ten seconds flat

if you think that you’re going insane in quarantine just know that last night at 2am i was milly rocking so aggressively to hozier that i spilled bubblegum mouthwash all over my pants and my first thought was to make a post about it on tumblr 

bro get the fuck out of here with your “broth.” what the fuck even is that? bro seriously stop calling my ramen juice “broth.”

i always quit out of spotify on my phone before jaywalking because i’m terrified that a car will run me over and my mom will check my phone to see that baby one more time by britney spears is the last song i was listening to and engrave it on my gravestone 

i was scrolling through the nyan cat wikipedia, as one does, and i found out that as of March 2019 nyan cat has been bought by an anti-capitalist streaming service. literally what the fuck am i supposed to do with the knowledge that nyan cat is communist now???

me googling "lee felix freckles": self care

when i say “not all men” i mean Rick Riordan specifically. sir if ur reading this pls become my grandfather.

i swear to god if i see one more post talking about how “quarantine isn’t any different from my daily routine haha” i’m going to flip like yes i know you’re introverted i found your blog on the drarry tag

some of y’all haven’t seen 161206 kino and it shows

confession time: once i fully stopped reading a fanfiction because the soundtrack had September by Earth, Wind & Fire on it

if i got to throw down with one historical figure no questions asked it would definitely be john calvin. the little bitchboy of organized religion. 

double texting is a social construct send me a five paragraph analytical essay with a full intro, conclusion, and embedded quotations cited in MLA format