something fruity is afoot

Any TVL cast member being interviewed: yeah so when I first read the script I wanted to murder Rolin with my bare hands :) haha yeah he butchered my character so badly that I threw my laptop across the room :) aha and then I yelled at him for two hours which only resulted in minor tweaks to the script :) yeah I was so shocked and confused :) and he comes up with scenes that don’t make any sense in-universe. :) and I worry for the future of this tv show :) but it’s alright as long as you think about how [5 min in depth analysis of details that the cast member has come up themselves to justify the season despite these justifications not being evident in the actual show at all] aha :)

Don't let these prices hold you back! This fiendish kitty now coming in for only $6.89!

nolan’s odyssey is such a textbook study on the idiocy and dangers of presentism. yes of course penelope is a modern day feminist who wants to rule ithaca by herself. they make telemachus say that GREECE IS THE GREATEST CIVILIZATION IN THE WORLD as if the entire point of the massing of achaeans at troy for one unified cause isn’t spectacular precisely because THERE IS NO CONCEPT OF A UNIFIED GREECE NATIONS DO NOT EXISTTTTTT YETTTTT. literally 101 on historical writing is making sure that you’re avoiding strict periodization because the people living in a “period” will not identify themselves that way. ever. five million cheeky nods to “the sea peoples” but we’re being cute and coy and calling them “the people from the sea.” the obsession with xenia but refusal to call it xenia yes let’s say “zeus’s law” a hundred times and reduce it to the literal expectation that any stranger could be a god in disguise. how was penelope just hanging out in the main hall of the palace with her husband’s dinner guests while they were playing with weapons with her HAIR COMPLETELY DOWN no veil no nothing just chilling casually. comical. stoppppp making movies that engage in historical viewpoints if you’re going to slather a modernized coat of paint over the top. “the past is a foreign country, they do things differently there.” or fucking whatever.

nolan's odyssey is like fennel's wuthering heights. it's a self indulgent bastardization where the original's only purpose is for easy name-recognition marketing. nolan's odyssey is nolan's incomplete, immature interpretation of the odyssey in the same way that fennel's wuthering heights is, by her own description, a manifestation of how reading the book at 14 years old made her feel. nolan's odyssey is a manifestation of how reading the odyssey made christopher nolan personally feel. it has no larger point to make or greater question to ask or idea to explore. it is just how christopher nolan feels about the odyssey as a middle aged british man. it has absolutely zero interest in the source material and its historical and cultural context the way fennel's wuthering heights has no interest in its source material. whether you find it novel or enjoyable will depend on how much you can resonate with a white millionaire man's shallow, elementary interpretation of a story he can barely grasp the meaning of because he cannot engage with it past it's immediate effect on his own limited identity and worldview, the same way wuthering heights was enjoyable if you were able to resonate with a white, old-money british woman's shallow, elementary interpretation of a story she could barely grasp the meaning of because she could not engage with it past its immediate effect on her being horny and wanting to fuck jacob elordi. both are effectively self insert fanfiction masquerading as adaptations because the aesthetic of historical dramas makes movies marginally more exciting, or they would if the costumes weren't terrible, when really both would have worked far better as truly just modern retellings, because that is what they fundamentally are, and the time periods in which they are set are not the cultural foundation of the story, but meaningless set dressing.

I hope my spider fucking book will hold universal appeal

someone accused me of feigning a sexual attraction to spiders for clout. there's easier ways to get clout, man.....

“hes a woman to me” IS HE? or are you equating women with submissive character traits you've arbitrarily put on a random man

this is already an absolutely tone-deaf and borderline transmisogynistic response but i think it gets even more jawdropping when your blog makes it really obvious youre talking about alexander hamilton

the mexican football team has a 17 yrs old player and one of the funniest outcomes of this is that he cannot appear in any ad for gambling or drinking so he only appears in candy and milk advertisements. his first world cup and he's not even legally allowed to drive. his nickname is "morita" (little berry). he's three apples tall.

i need to get off tumblr i’m at the aquarium admiring the fish and my brain goes “posts that make you want to get in the water” what are you talking about. these are live fish in the room with you. what post.

did a bit of driving through the state of georgia today and wound up driving through a small town that i later discovered was called newborn, which is an odd name but doesn’t technically have anything wrong with it, except for the fact that i nearly gave myself whiplash doing a double-take at a building sign advertising NEWBORN TAXIDERMY