Maekar: You actually were telling the truth
Mando, the chronic liar: I do that quite a lot, and yet people are always surprised

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@judicialcitrusscale
Maekar: You actually were telling the truth
Mando, the chronic liar: I do that quite a lot, and yet people are always surprised

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Mando: well y'know what they say
Mando: a sharp tongue can bring a smart man down to his knees quicker than a blade
Baelor: :O
Mando: I meant as in the power of words, diplomacy! My gods, ser!
Thinking about Pup!Duncan
Beer makes Mando silly
Wine makes them sad
Lyonel very quickly learns not to get Mando wine drunk bc otherwise it ruins his own drinking
The word soft being used in reference to Duncan irks me
That man is kind, sweet, caring, considerate
Soft alludes to something easily broken, and while Duncan does allow himself to bend to the whims of others at times, he does not allow himself to break
Ser Duncan the Tall, Dunk of Flea Bottom, is not a breakable man

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Modern!Stormhedge as the "when he copies your snaps so you pull dis move" trend
Decently muscled Lyonel and then BOOM big hunk of meat that is Dunc's bicep
The Woodlands Trio, all things you can find in a forest
Duncan - tree, there's no woods without trees
Aegon - egg, an unknown but beloved new thing
Lyonel - stag, a noble leader that guides the herd
Mando - hunter, a noticeable outsider
Mando: God, please give me patience, bc if you give me strength I'm going to need bail money
Modern Au AKOTSK is Lyonel hitting his 30s and deciding on not taking over the family business, leaving all that boring shit to one of his sisters, and opening a bar instead
At first everyone thinks he's just messing around, another one of his spur of the moment shenanigans that he'll get bored with within the month, but no he's still got the place running a decade later and it's doing really well
It'd be named some shit like Liquor Hole or The Big Stag or or some other cheeky innuendo
Drunkingly teaching Virgin!Duncan proper hole prep (using your hands as visual demonstration) bc he accidentally confessed to having no experience
And while you silently mourn (so sure you have no chance of getting with the hedge knight), you still give as indepth a lesson as you can, because he's your friend above all else and you want him to have a good time the first time
And then later on he confesses his harbored feelings and enthusiastically uses what you taught him on you

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There actually needs to be more Sandor Clegane/Tormund Giantsbane fics
The ginger man wants to climb trees, let him climb trees
Thinking about Lyonel and Duncan taking turns with you Lyonel's wife and Lyonel trying to goad Duncan into competitive marathon sex to see whose seed would take first
It ends up being a heteropaternal superfecundation pregnancy
Duncan & literally any of his friends are that one John Mulaney bit about his girlfriend being his personal lawyer
Duncan: sometimes, Egg, you simply must be the bigger man
Egg: easy for you to say!
I like headcanoning headcanonning headcanon'ing?
I like imagining Lyonel as the second youngest child and only boy
One child after the other were popping out until finally, once both Lord Baratheon and Lady Baratheon had grown weary and frustrated, out came Lyonel
The most energetic and obnoxious infant in the world
But that's okay, because finally the Baratheons had their heir and now they only now need a backup for emergencies and oh there's Lyonel's final sister
And Lady Baratheon is fucking done. She's popped out nearly 10 children, and only one was a boy (but a boy nonetheless)
Her husband has his heir, and now it's his responsibility to take care of it. And if the oaf fucks it up and the child dies? Oh well, not her problem, she's done with children

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Mando, reinventing the Rising Phoenix during the Trail of Seven: CAW CAW BITCHES!!
Baelor: so that's what he meant
Maekar: oh fuck
Duncan, with a severe concussion: I didn't know dragons made bird sounds
Aerion.exe has stopped working
Mando: I'm here as legal representation of Ser Duncan the Tall on the grounds of an alleged altercation between him and...
Mando, leaning towards Duncan: which one?
Duncan: what?
Mando: which one did you piss off?
Duncan: the blonde one
Mando: oh thanks Dunc, that really fucking narrowed it down