Joel's Scattered Thoughts

They are an Assistant Professor of Media Industries at New York University and literally just finished writing The Apple II Age: How the Computer Became Personal, a book on the history of the computer industry in the 70s.

tell yourself things you do not believe. it feels stupid at first but I've done this for years and now I believe it when I say "I'm good at this" or "I love myself" or "I deserve good shit!"

make a note of every mundane good thing that happens to you. mental or literal notes! could be as little as "the sky is a nice shade of grey, it's calming" or "I ate a piece of fruit today, I'm looking after myself" or "I talked to a friend". again, feels stupid at first, but I genuinely believe this is part of why I have so many "good days". trick your brain into storing things in your long-term memory that you wouldn't otherwise remember.

they're coming from someone who had multiple daily panic attacks for half a decade. someone who genuinely felt like he did not deserve to live. someone who hated himself so much he convinced himself he was irredeemably evil. someone who loves being alive these days, even though it's difficult sometimes.

i was talking to a mutual and decided to make a book recommendation list:

Firebird Chronicles by T.A. White  

book 1 blurb:

Kira Forrest is a survivor. She’s risen above the pain of her beginnings to become a war hero only to leave it all behind in the pursuit of a simple life. Now a salvager, she makes a living sifting through the wreckage of dead alien ships from a war that nearly brought humanity to its knees. After her ship takes damage, she’s forced to re-route to a space station where her past and present collide with dangerous consequences. Kira’s existence holds the key to a faltering peace treaty with the Tuann—a technologically advanced alien race who dislikes and distrusts all humans. Winning her freedom should be easy, but a powerful and relentless Tuann warrior stands in her way. Deceiving him seems impossible, especially when he strays dangerously close to secrets she struggles to hide. Can Kira reconcile the pain of her past with the possibilities of her future? The fate of two races depends on her success.

it’s a sci fi series, her best friend in the whole wide universe is that floating robot AI that is more than just AI, she’s currently a salvager but she was a hero and a force to be reckoned with in the alien wars 9 years ago.  and now she’s being pulled back into intergalactic intrigue and looming wars, all the while trying to figure out her mysterious past.

Confluence series by Jennifer Foehner Wells

(book 1 blurb)

Dr. Jane Holloway is a language savant, living a staid academic life, studying dead languages. But when NASA offers her a spot on a team that will be exploring a derelict alien ship found decades before in the asteroid belt, she shoves aside her discomfort to go on an adventure.

Except the ship is far from derelict.

Or unoccupied.

What she assumed would be more of an archeological dig, turns into a fight for her life and the lives of her teammates as the mission devolves into chaos.

And all along Jane is receiving strange psychic transmissions that she can’t explain, can’t quite believe are real, and can’t reveal to her team, for fear they’ll assume she’s gone insane.

Jane fights the growing doubts of her colleagues as she attempts to decipher what the alien voice wants from her. As the crew gets cut off from their escape route, Jane must decide if she can trust the alien’s help to survive.

Rights you have from birth are slowly stripped away by conservative politicians.

Constructs are created to control. Medical debt? Student debt? Remove these constructs and you have instant freedom.

Elena, dying of a heart attack: I'm not talking to you anymore AND I'm telling your mom!

Illium, scared shitless now and on the verge of tears: DON'T TELL MY MOM, PLEASE! I'M SORRY!