I'm out of weed so I have to smoke thw one that makea me scared

if i got jigsawed and woke up in some moldy room with a makeshift bear trap on my head or whatever i wouldn't even let it phase me. i'm not willing to be taught lessons i'm not paying attention to a puppet. i would close my eyes and visualize abstract forms in jewel tones until a machine tears me asunder. now we've both wasted our time and you won't be able to return anything in this room to ace hardware. what did YOU learn, old man

you want your city to be walkable and bikeable? what's next? suckable? fuckable?

me 15 seconds into a male on male zoom call: actually you know what? *territorial chimp noises*

I don’t wanna scare you while you’re high but I actually invited millions of people over and they’re all waiting outside right now. Hope that’s okay

like this if you think people in airplanes are gay

What happens do it mean if I reblogged it

Every woman just died

#you have kids coughing covid into teachers' faces bc parents protested mask mandates and refuse to vaccinate their kids#then you accuse teachers of indoctrinating children because they might mention that a gay person exists#and you expect teachers to be human shields against an assault rifle#all for abysmally low pay#and surprise! people decide to say fuck that shit!!!

we need personally tailored hormone cocktails. if u want estrogen curves a non functional dick and a flat chest u should be able to get that. if u want huge tits hard cock huge loads we should promote that. when i’m president we’ll kill all real estate agents in the street like dogs.