i could definitely beat the shit out of master chief seeing as i'm a lesbian and he's not a lesbian

the mexican football team has a 17 yrs old player and one of the funniest outcomes of this is that he cannot appear in any ad for gambling or drinking so he only appears in candy and milk advertisements. his first world cup and he's not even legally allowed to drive. his nickname is "morita" (little berry). he's three apples tall.

men will say “princess treatment ❤️” and then it’s just how i normally treat the cashier at the store

im so sorry that you're doomed by the narrative but i really need you to answer my message on Microsoft Teams

I don’t have rizz I’m just nice and weird

they should invent activities for sleepy people with no energy