jelly_babiesss

by phannie_feels

Troy Barret is such a pain in Harris' ass (hehe get it)

Harris himself only realises this after Troy has been in Ottawa for nearly 2 years and has gotten much more comfortable, not only with the team but with himself as well. Of course Harris is delighted that Troy can feel this way, however he is less fond of the consequences that come with Troy's comfortability.

It turns out that when Troy is comfortable around people he looses his filter. He will say whatever he is thunking and will not even begin to hesitate and worry about what others will think (something that Harris believes Ilya taught Troy). He will say things without thinking of the consequences: will this offend anyone, who might hear this, will this cause more work for Harris.

Literally none of that occurs to Troy.

It isn't much of a problem at first. The unfiltered comments remaining contained withing the safety of the team. Until Ilya and Troy start hanging out in public together.

Harris really does love that they are such good friends to eaxhother but he has to admit - Ilya truly brings out the worst in Troy. Harris knows this is dramatic but its the only way he can describe it.

The two friends have taken to calling eachother fags put in public, talking about peoples horrible fashions sense when they are literally sat opposite them, and many more things that eventually of course end up viral online.

'Two hockey players calling eachother the f slur- a rise in homophobia in the NHL' says on article

'Homosexual people proven to be judgy and rude to straight members of the public'says another.

Harris dreads the day that the two's messages are leaked to the world which he has accepted to be inevitable due to Ilya and Troy's lack of concern for security on any of their devices which Harris struggles to fathom considering the two's track record of secret public closeted relationships.

The thing is, Harris doesn't have it in him to tell Troy off. He doesn't care when he has to send a strongly worder email to Ilya but with Troy its different. He can see that Troy is only acting this way because he feels comfortable and there is nothing that Harris wants more than for Troy to feel that way. He simply wishes he was comfortable around different peope and perhaps a tad bit less comfortable.

Harris of course, rather than reprimand his lovely boyfriend to take his complaints to the source and blames Ilya for 'corrupting' Troy.

Unfortunatley a reporter heard this and there was yet another article produced

'Gay NHL play Ilya Rozanov forcing innocent players to turn gay!'

Hanging with Team Canada,doing some easy soccer drills,seeing some of the braver soccer stars try skating and shooting a puck,letting the Europeans and whoever else wants to try show off some juggling, and shots on goal. A light hearted soccer trivia quiz for a Centaurs intercut with a hockey quiz for the soccer players. A tongue in cheek "fouls in soccer vs hits in ice hockey" sketch etc.

It turns out Haasy is a big soccer fan,and freaking amazing at juggling. His mom sent some adorable pics of baby Haasy kicking a soccer ball,in oversized jersey, fan scarf and hat,beaming gap toothed,sitting on his equally decked out dad's shoulders,with his just as dressed up siblings,cheering at a game,just for the video. Both the Centaurs and the Internet collectively melt over the sheer cuteness of baby Haasy. Much to the poor kid's unending horror,and suffering. He knows Sims can die from mortification but he feels like he's about to find out if humans can too. To be honest he'd welcome it at this point. Please no one look directly at him for the next month or two. And he was so happy that his parents immediately adored Ilya from the moment they met. Oh how naive he was *dramatic sigh* (he's mostly kidding but also 🥺 please be nice to him he's very stressed)

In all the playoffs and Cup winning madness Haasy and the team then completely forget about the whole thing. Until Haasy gets an official invite by Team Switzerland to attend one of their matches,and come hang out with their team.

Team Switzerland's star striker happens to be a big hockey fan,and more precisely a big Haasy fanboy. He also happens to be a great guy,wickedly handsome, and bisexual. Haasy has a really nice time but unlike the entire Internet,and the Centaurs groupchat, he fails to pick up on the guy's blatant flirting immortalized in the widely shared,cute social media content of the entire thing.

He doesn't even catch on when the guy takes him out to dinner,complete with walking Haasy up to his hotel room door like a gentleman.

Haasy doesn't realize until he arrives at the hockey camps to help out. Mostly because the Centaurs,and Bears won't let him live it down the entire time - lovingly, of course.

Then he flies home and has to get ribbed some more about it by his siblings😂

Don't worry about Haasy though,soccer guy and him exchanged numbers and follow each other on socials- contrary to popular belief this shy,anxious bottom isn't actually a virgin,he'll be okay😉

Ilya,Bood,Troy,Dykstra,Chouinard,Dillon and the rest are torn between being proud cheerleaders,and overprotective busy bodies. Shane is more concerned with making sure they aren't getting too involved.

@mothmans-a-milf ‘s comment

@ilyarozanovsmediatrainer ‘s reblog

Everyone expects it to be about hockey, but it's really not. They sometimes mention hockey, but mostly talk about other stuff.

At the beginning they meticulously prepare the talking points for each episode, but they soon realise people are pretty entertained just by them talking about random topics and being weird. They might start by discussing the nutritional value of salmon and half an hour later their audience is listening to a thorough explanation of salmon migration patterns.

Sometimes they'll have guests, more often than not hockey related, but they still don't discuss the sport. With Yuna they discuss the cultural differences between Japan and Canada. Luca talks about ducks and cows. Harris guides them through queer history of Canada and shares funny stories of Troy and Chiron. One time they bring all of Hayden's kids and that's how the wider public finds out about Shane and Ilya's secret wedding.

People are obsessed with it. They are finding out new facts about their favourite athletes in an incredibly unhinged way, because there is no way this sounds normal with Troy and Shane as hosts. It's probably completely serious one moment and full of giggles the next, because somethong happens that is literally only funny to them.

They do make sure to not drive Harris completely mad with their weird statements.

I would LOVE to see him in sort of an outsider perspective for a couple episodes as we get into Shane and Ilya's story. Like with Scott Hunter, we know he's a side character, but we don't know the extent of his inner world until episode 3.

I'd love to see him be homophobic and an asshole with Dallas, then show up on the Centaurs' doorstep looking like a kicked puppy. Everyone is standoffish to him and he doesn't even get much screen time at first.

And then we get to find out his story, either a solo episode like Skip got or more woven into the remaining episodes as his story progresses alongside Ilya and Shane's.

I really want it to seem like he's unlikeable but got something going on for the first few times we see him, just so we can really get the setup of how much he has to change and what it means for him to be who he is.

Like, imagine if we get a scene in an early episode where he's on a phone call with Adrian. We only hear his side, but its obvious Adrian is breaking up with him. Plus, Adrian is a gender neutral name, so audiences may assume Adrian is a girl.

He wears black, because it's the least hassle possible. Black shirt, black pants, no opportunity to miss match the colours.

When Harris asked him what his favourite type of apple is, he said red, because everyone knows apples are green or red and fuck if he knows the difference. To him apples are either sweet or sour and he has no idea if the taste depends on colour.

He'd never had issues differentiating players on ice, because Toronto's colours are blue and white and those don't cause him any problems. Ottawa is black and red though which makes it a bit more tricky, but he can still just focus on the black and it's fine.

He never really gives the whole thing much though and is half convinced everyone just goes through life like this.

It finally comes out when Wyatt's starts explaining something about superheroes and it becomes clear Troy believes two characters are dressed in the same colour, when they clearly aren't. The Centaurs proceede to waste half the practice asking Troy what colour he thinks different objects are.

he’s the type to be polite and shy unless he’s driving, luca’s road rage is something you never want to mess with (he mostly took public transport in switzerland since it’s comparatively better than ottawa’s)

he hates spinach. once, shane brought him a spinach smoothie and he forced himself to chug it down (it’s not everyday one of your childhood idols makes you a smoothie)

he’s a big orange juice person, but he also adores drover cider

he can bake but he can’t cook. since focusing on his career, a lot of his recipes have been on the healthier side, so he brings the cens baked goods on occasion and handles dessert for bbqs

his playlists are eurodance, kpop, arctic monkeys, the neighborhood, and like a singular dykstra country song that grew on him

he listens to cascada when he works out

Haas: something easy, popsicles!

Harris: that's cute!

Haas: and it's summer, so they are melting, and dripping

Harris: *nervous laugh*

Haas: now let's add someone licking it