jammerus

“men dont like that. its such a turn off” good . turn off . where is ur off button . shut up . please stop making noise

Reblog if you think it’s okay to platonically say “I Love You” to your friends

Slams the reblog button so damn fast

I’m so wifeable

I can boil water really good

sitting on and touching warm rocks…………. now thats the good stuff…….

Are you….. A reptile ?

what are you a cop? mind your business 

my future husband is going to have the coolest wife lol u go dude

someone said ‘the version of me you created in your mind is not my responsibility’ and wow

#freshly peeled sheeps

reblogging solely for that deeply unnerving caption

@theosartisticthematics

FRESHLY PEELED SHEEPS

Fuck this. Does everyone just not see the blood scrapes on some of their backs and faces???!!! Anyone, seriously, correct me if I’m wrong because this is making me upset af

in conclusion, it is good to peel the sheeps

Please peel your sheeps

They. Look. Like. Peeled. Potatoes

Peel your sheep peeps!

he’s smiling in that last one

HE HAS BEEN SAVED

shorn

points about this -it was shot off by a cannon -he continued being a knight for over 40 years after getting the iron hand -it was delicate enough he could still write with a quill using it, which is important as he was described as a ‘warrior poet’ -after a merchant-punching life suitable for an elder scrolls protagonist he was outlawed by the holy roman empire, friends of his used a high diplomacy roll and a bribe to get him out, and he then almost immediately kidnapped a bishop -after outlaw of the holy roman empire 2 electric boogaloo was placed under house arrest in a castle he had purchased with all his quest rewards to spend the next 20 years drunk off his ass

I can’t believe you’d make this post and not mention that his poetry contains the first known usage of the phrase “lick my ass”

am i losing my mind or is that a left hand

why are we here? just to suffer? every 5 minutes i have to clean my glasses