heart full of sadness and stomach full of pizza.

*sigh* fine, fine, i'll be the new doctor who showrunner. bring me two twinks, britain's tallest woman, and 1000 pounds worth of alumininamian foil

i have been informed by literally every french speaker on earth that “une pipe” is slang for blowjob

Ryan Gosling’s career has just been one long quest to climb the Warner Bros water tower

literally cannot get enough of the cursed amulet it feels like a warm blanket on my brain

you've really gotta try thi- well, try a similar amulet. really lovely if you can get one.

the thing about phone in bed is that it's so awesome. almost makes you feel like betraying & destroying yourself for nothing isn't all so bad

Yu-Gi-Oh fans really saw the scalpers coming and said "You've activated my trap card".

my mother is playing pikmin and yelling at them in the exact tone of voice she uses for me and my siblings so we go into fight or flight every time. we thought initially that this meant she regarded the pikmin as akin to her children, but I now fear she’s always viewed us as pikmin