On A Journey To The Center Of Myself

Touch me Blindly Let your fingers Find me My face My skin Let the beauty Seep in Sweaty palms Night lights Let our souls Ignite Through the fire And the flames Our inferno Can't be tamed Your touch, Your feel, Is it something? Is it real? I need more I crave you I hope your touch Wants my touch too.

We've never been here To this unknown, Uncharted territory Yet, with your hand in mine I feel familiarity As if I have a map, Or an inner compass That guides me home No matter how far I may travel No matter how lost I may become

Smoke billows from underneath my car as I press my foot on the gas. I am going. I don’t know where, But I am going there. I don’t know if my destination Is a place on this earth, a place in my mind, Or a place in your heart, But I’m going. Wherever that may be, I’m going. I hope to see you soon, With your wide eyes, And your free spirit. I don’t know when I’ll be back, Or if you’ll be waiting, But if you leave I hope you find home Somewhere, or in someone. Do not be scared moon child, Let fear guide you, and you will find yourself in the loneliness.

Too close to touch, yet too far out of reach

There aren’t any more P.S I love yous, or those overly drawn out voicemails asking if I wanted Chinese food or sushi. The only reminders I have of you are couch stains from lo mein, And cavities in my bed where our bodies would be. We were always intertwined And now I can’t occupy the space, The crater that was our collaboration. All I have left of you, The only factor that’s growing, infinitely, Is the space in between us- The gap of time between where we once were, And where we are now.

I am trying to heal and keep myself together, but you ripped holes Into my soul and I lost a part of me- forever.

Special moments we don’t appreciate as much as we should: Touching someone’s hair Get your hair touched Belly laughing Pillow talks Ignorant bliss Looking at the stars Sunrises and sunsets Cuddling with someone and morphing into the same being/mega human Helping an elderly person cross the street Moving Traveling Physical, mental and emotional exploration Holding someone’s hand Drinking water when you’re parched Chasing after the ice cream truck Getting caught in the rain …. and then kissing in it Reaching the peak of a mountain Getting “a high” when you love what you’re doing, (or who you’re doing ;) Drinking on the beach That warm, fuzzy feeling Helping someone who is truly thankful Holding a baby Genuine and loving eye contact Crying tears of joy Making love with the person you love Silence and self reflection Growth, integrity, and wisdom And lastly, appreciating the little things when the big things in life disappoint you.

If you ever read any of my poems, you would feel like you already know them.

No, I can’t say that something is wrong. Nothing is wrong, but nothing feels right, either.

You are in every single line of my story, you linger in the gaps between my fingertips, you exist in the fragments of time between heartbeats, Your dust remains on my old shelves and book cases, and oil stains on walls remind me of where our bodies were. You may have left me, but there will always be pieces of you here, in my heart.

She was a mess, a walking catastrophe, a nightmare of a person, yet a dream to me She was a loner, I must confess. People only loved her when they saw her undress She never saw me, but I watched from afar. She had her own orbit, she was a shooting star. She was certainly strange, as odd as they come I think I could learn from her and all she has done One day I asked her name, I said "Hi, I'm Julia" She said her look is a cover, "don't let the outside fool you" She sat next to me with a beer in her hand, then she told me to chug it and we never talked again

You are my sunrise. Just when I think nightfall is an all encompassing and permanent state, there you are with your brilliant rays of ambient light, constantly reminding me that the indigo sheets coating the sky, are merely temporary.

You speak quickly With pointless banter, Your never ending And incessant chatter. Yammering along With another spiel, You’ll never realize What silence can reveal.

Hasn't it occurred to you That I need reassurance too?

The world is vast, Yet here we are Looking at the sky At different times From our own eyes Never knowing if My sky looks anything Like your sky His sky, or her sky Maybe someone is Seeing the same sky And wondering if Anyone else out there Sees what they see Perhaps this is Your soulmate, Looking to challenge you Without changing you

When I look at you I see who you are now I want to know your story What, when, if, why and how I wonder about your home The place you used to live How long you played with toys When you were a little kid If your parents read you books Every night before bed, When they stopped saying goodnight And kissing the top of your head Why are you the way you are With your curves and sharp edges What stopped you from jumping off Sixty foot tall hotel ledges You had one hell of a journey That is a known fact But you cannot forge onward Without ever looking back I want to see your spirit Where you end and you begin Tell me your darkest secrets, Show me love and let me in.