Uhhh Lil Homie Gay Ass

was talking to a coworker and realised i could not for the life of me remember his name but i was too embarrassed to ask because we've spoken multiple times so mid-conversation i started concocting a plan to nudge the conversation towards the ID photos on our building passes so that i could be like oh my ID photo is awful haha the camera they use to take these has a real talent for making me look as unphotogenic as possible and then he would say oh yes me too haha everyone says that (because they do) and then i would be able to say well let me see yours it can't be as bad as mine! and he would show me his ID because we are coworkers and why wouldn't he and this would allow me to see his building pass which of course would have his name on it and then i would be able to say well yours is perfectly nice it must be me that's the problem! and then we would have a polite chuckle about it and i would have his name without needing to ask for it and he would be none the wiser and all would be well but then before i could execute this fine plan a little voice in my head went "so this is some light yagami bull shit you are about to pull" which was such a violent reality check it shocked me completely out of my embarrassment and i went "hey im so sorry your name has slipped my mind could you remind me" and he did and it was fine.

"This is some Light Yagami bull shit you are about to pull" <- Littany against avoiding small embarrassing/awkward moments that don't matter with over the top ass mind games.

problematic sudoku solving skills gap

It’s the eternal pattern of American politics. Republicans mess up the country, people get tired of it. Democrats are voted in. They spend all their time in office fixing what the republicans broke and are bad at effectively communicating what they got done. People are still suffering from what the republicans did. People somehow decide the republicans will fix this. They vote in the republicans. Rinse and repeat.

The democrats obviously have a lot wrong with them but they’re more effective at getting shit done than people give them credit for. The problem is that a lot of their getting shit done energy is forced to be spent rebuilding everything that the last guys just blew up.

you have to be careful reading too many things that are good/smart/well-written bc then you encounter something that isnt and you get confused like ? why didnt they just make this good ? were they stupid

And this isn't a broken-up couple on the rebound. They've absolutely always been like this with each other save for the 11 months they were married, during which time every single day was a murder-suicide risk.

Two people who are each other's absolute everything unless you try to make them share a kitchen and a budgeting system

Sibling rivalry only works on the page if both siblings secretly think the other one got the easier version of their childhood. Nobody thinks they won. Write both of them convinced they lost, and suddenly the fighting makes sense.

yknow even the rick and morty redditors 10 years ago hated family guy for being tired and unfunny. what's up with all the 20-25yo tme gays suddenly into family guy and south park now. why am i seeing more and more south park cosplayers at the fucking anime con

you have worse taste than the fucking gamergate guys??

Who wants to hear a DIY tiling pro tip that the experts won't tell you

Yes!

Do not drop your phone into the bucket of tile adhesive. This step is actually completely unnecessary and massively complicates the tiling process.

You say this but my uncle is a tiler and he swears by the “drop phone in putty bucket” technique. I think you’re just posting this for clout

Your uncle is caught up in a tradition that he was taught as an apprentice that he never questioned. Modern putty doesn't require phone, the formula has changed.

MY uncle says some customers still demand the phone putty technique because it "doesn't look right otherwise"

Drop an empty phone case in and those customers can't tell the fucking difference because there is no fucking difference.

My mum renovated houses for thirty years, she says “you’re half right, but in some cases - particularly in houses built before 1930 - the phone does add some benefit. Could be a tablet too if you’ve an old one in the garage. And anyone who says it’s got to be a particular model is just being precious about it, whatever the forums say.”

IPhones and tablets where invented in 1898, what did they do before then?

Nothing, tiles were invented in 1899.

tumblr users will see a post and go "does anyone want to start a bit" and not wait for an answer