FRICK

(fic here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26444350/chapters/64490578! ) 

image id’s under the cut, huge thanks to @marywhal​ for them! 

PSA on Britney Spears and the #FreeBritney movement for anyone that needs or wants more information on what is going on with her. It’s a fucking rabbit hole, so buckle up.

A little backstory first. Britney was a child star starting at the age of 4 years old on Broadway, and then worked her way to the Mickey Mouse Club, and eventually the solo career we know today. Her career has been on autopilot her entire life. If you look back at her music, she’s been telling everyone for years she’s too controlled and treated as a product if you listen to the lyrics of most of her hits. Examples include: Lucky, Overprotected, My Perogative, Circus, Piece of Me and Gimme More. Her music videos, social media posts, tour props and photoshoots regularly show her in a cage or in chains. If anyone has ever seen videos of her when she was younger, you’d know her REAL singing voice is very similar to Christina Aguilera’s. Her record label didn’t like it, as they were both on the Mickey Mouse Club and about to release their debut albums at the same time. So they had her voice retrained to sing in the baby voice we all know today because they believed it to be more iconic and would create a brand and career for her instead of her real voice. It’s unhealthy, and it’s been destroying her voice over the years, thus why she is known for lip syncing. She wanted to make an acoustic type pop album in 2006 titled Original Doll and reinvent herself using her real voice. The album was shelved and cancelled once her label realized she would be singing in her real voice. She isn’t allowed to sing live because she will either fail terribly, or she’ll have to sing in her deep voice that she isn’t known for. Her entire career she has been treated like a product meant to sell.

Now, for the real tea.

Everyone remembers the 2007 meltdown. Everyone. Leading up the meltdown Britney was going thru a public divorce, had two children under the age of 2 at the time and was VERY much the focus of the public. We all saw her on every magazine cover. We all also saw the photo of her with one of her kids on her lap while driving. Go on YouTube once and look up ‘Britney Spears paparazzi’. You’ll watch her be chased and followed by hundreds of them, even trying to get into a public restroom to photograph her, videotaping her in tears asking them to leave her alone, and even filming her thru the windows of an ambulance while she was naked being taken away for her final mental health hold.

After the public meltdown, shaving her head, locking herself in her home with her children, speaking in a british accent on regular basis, wearing the imfamous pink wig everywhere, and shopping naked, she was hospitalized twice. After the hospitalization, her father petitioned the courts to be a TEMPORARY conservator to her until she was mentally stable and for only one years time. 2 months after her hospitalization she did a guest appearance on How I Met Your Mother. 6 months after her hospitalization, she drops the Womanizer video and starts to promote her new album Circus with its worldwide tour that grossed $131.8 million. If she’s so unwell, why did she start working right away?

Her father after one year petitioned the courts for the conservatorship to become permanent due to her ALLEGEDLY having EARLY ONSET DEMENTIA in her TWENTIES. It passed and has been that way ever since. For 12 years to be exact.

Now for everyone that doesn’t understand what that means let me break it down for you.

Britney Spears is a now 38 year old woman who is not allowed to do the following without her fathers permission or he can legally lock her up in a mental health facility:

• drive a car

• vote

• get married

• have children

• spend HER OWN MONEY

• see how her money is being spent

• see her children (she has 30% custody of both of her boys due to her dad assaulting one of her sons)

• leave her home

• hire her own lawyer

• have any control over her career

• speak about the conservatorship publicly

• do interviews that aren’t scripted and all final cuts are approved by her father as well

• use a cell phone without being monitored

• use social media unmonitored

• contact ANYONE without being monitored or having them extremely vetted. (Iggy Azalea allegedly had her house searched for drugs top to bottom when they collaborated on a song together)

• go shopping

• go for a walk

• get Starbucks

A conservatorship is meant for people with mental health issues or decaying health. Most likely grandparents or people with actual dementia etc. They are meant for people who literally cannot take care of themselves. If she is so unwell that she isn’t mentally capable of doing anything for herself, why is she still working? Since the conservatorship began 12 years ago she has:

• released 4 albums

• done 3 worldwide tours

• did a FOUR-year Vegas residency

• was a full time judge on X-Factor

• released multiple perfumes and a lingerie line

• made $138 MILLION DOLLARS or so A YEAR

In January of last year, Britney was placed in a mental health facility for 3 months after being seen driving her car to In-N-Out with her boyfriend without permission and for refusing to take the sedating medications her father has doctors prescribing her to keep her under control. She testified to a judge in documents that she was held there against her will by her father. After it was leaked to the press that she was there against her will, the Free Britney movement picked up speed causing a judge to open an investigation into the impact and legality her conservatorship has on her life. Britney’s mother Lynn was also liking and commenting on Free Britney posts saying she agrees that Britney is trapped by her father. Britney’s team had Twitter disable the Free Britney hashtag, and regularly threatens any celebrity that speaks out using the hashtag with a lawsuit if they don’t remove their support for the movement. She was seen shortly after leaving a hotel thru the front door (99% of celebrities park underground to avoid paparazzi unless they WANT to be photographed) stumbling while carrying her shoes, and out of it. Her team used that moment to justify to the public that she needs this conservatorship. She is not allowed to have any say in the hiring or firing of anyone on her team. Every year she pays $1.1 million dollars in fees for the conservatorship to continue, including paying her father a solid $100k+ salary and paying a lawyer she isn’t allowed to choose. She is allowed an allowance of around $1,500 a week for bills, shopping and essentials. Her net worth is $250 million.

Persephone: fuck you

Hades: I wish you would

Chant II - a summary:

Orpheus: I think you and Persephone need to bone

Mary Stuart Masterson and Mary-Louise Parker on the set of Fried Green Tomatoes (1991).

David: Do I hear margaritas?

Probably the thing I love most about both the Good Omens and Schitts Creek ships is that most ships are fans going "you didn't give us what we needed so we're going to write / draw / create what we want, pieced together from a million different scraps and we'll use those scraps and patch them into something glorious" but for both GO and SC it's "you gave us what we needed and this is going to be a foundation on which we build". And it's a very different vibe and experience because it's not coming from a basic disappointment in the canon. It's not "I love these characters, I hate what was done to them"; it's "I love these characters, I love this story, I want to build on it".

I thought it was hilarious and on track with the humor of the show. 

Listen, I know there are some people who are up in arms about this storyline, but I am not one of those people because I fully believe in their relationship and the fact that this was one, big, hilarious miscommunication. 

Sex is important, but trust and honestly make up the foundation of a healthy relationship and Dan has made sure to make that very clear throughout the course of the show. 

David wouldn’t have accepted the “happy ending” if he fully didn’t believe that was what Patrick wanted for him. He didn’t treat it like this big secret when Patrick comes back. He straight up tells him because who wouldn’t want to tell their husband about the handjob that was bought for them by them on their wedding day? 

And those who are like, “well he should have said no,” sure, okay, if that’s what you would have done in that situation, that is your choice and your relationship and you are entitled to that decision 100%. 

But he didn’t. And he didn’t because it’s pretty clear that he and Patrick have a lot of open and honest conversations about sex and this was just another thing to try. They are still monogamous. They are still committed. One accidental handjob isn’t going to be the end all be all because this relationship is founded on a lot more than that. 

BUT you know what I find REALLY interesting? The fact that all these people who are angry at David aren’t casting blame on Patrick as well. Just like David, we as an audience didn’t know this was all a miscommunication, so what if Patrick actually did purposefully pay for David to get the happy ending? Then would it be okay? Or would those people be angry at Patrick for the same reasons why they’re mad at David for saying yes? Because up until the reveal, it was believed that Patrick did in fact arrange for David to receive a happy ending. JUST SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT.