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he flipped through the pages , reliving every memory he had. “this is when me and your mom were in college—” “this was our first date—” “this was during our school festival—” jeongin went on and on about his younger days , eventually flipping on a page that was full of polaroids and camera printed images of him and his old friends.

“this was in college too.” said , "isn't that uncle minho?" chae-young said , pointing to a picture of her father and minho , “yes.. this was when i was in my early twenties! me , uncle minho , and uncle jisung used to hang out by the han river in hangang park nearly everyday after school.” jeongin said , a big smile on his face.

“dad ,” chae-yeon said , “who's this?” she said , pointing at a picture of jeongin and a man with (h/c) hair and (e/c) eyes. “that's.. an old friend.” he said in a lower voice , his smile got smaller each second he looked at the picture. “why don't we see him?” chae-young asked , an unknowing smile on her face as she looked at multiple pictures of the man and her father , "yeah , you guys have a lot of pictures together!" chae-yeon added. “he moved away.” jeongin said with a nervous smile. “aww.. he's so handsome too!” chae-yeon said , her sister swatting her in the back of her head. “ah! what!?” she whined , rubbing the back of her head , “he's dad's age now! that's disgusting!” chae-young said, chae-yeon pouted and stayed quiet.

“anyways dad , how'd you meet him?” chae-young asked. “we went to the same highschool , but i met him at uncle changbin's father's ramyeon shop.” jeongin answered , putting the photo album on the table and sitting back on the couch. “what year was it? 2007? yeah , in 2007 i met him at the ramyeon shop , we were both 17.” “what's his name?” chae-yeon asked , “(m/n).” jeongin said “uncle (m/n)~” chae-young sang , flipping through more of their pictures , “more like oppa (m/n)~” chae-yeon said , chae-young held her fist up and sucked her teeth. “ah , why!” chae-yeon said , pouting again and holding her legs up to her chest. the girls settled down and jeongin laughed before continuing his story.

“when we were in mr. seo's ramyeon shop , we ordered the same thing at the same time , how cliche is that?” jeongin said , “like a k-drama!” chae-yeon exclaimed , “yes, like a drama.. after that we sat down together and talked for a while , not about much , just introduced ourselves and exchanged numbers.” jeongin added , reminiscing.

—

jeongin was outside of mr. seo's ramyeon shop , awkwardly standing there in his SOPA uniform , one hand was on the strap of his backpack and the other holding onto his iphone 1. he was constantly checking the time , his friend minho was supposed to show up 6 minutes ago but he never came. jeongin was a shy person , an introvert , so minho was always with him , he was his voice when he couldn't speak for himself.

after 2 more minutes of waiting for minho , jeongin decided to just go in the shop , order his own food , and wait for minho to get there. when he walked up to the front counter a boy walked on the side of him , jeongin didn't think much of it , so he just told the cashier his order ,

“can i get one bowl of ramyeon?—”

“can i get one bowl of ramyeon?”

the two boys stood there looking at each other awkwardly , and the cashier got confused and put the orders in the same order , thinking they were together (not like that). “ please take a seat at table #4, we'll bring your food to you.” the cashier said , pointing at the table. “ah— wait..” jeongin said in a low voice , the cashier had walked away for a moment to handle some business and the two boys were left there dumbfounded.

the boy was the first to move to table #4 , and jeongin followed soon after. they sat at the table in silence until jeongin spoke up , “im yang jeongin..” he said , playing with his hands under the table nervously. “i'm (l/n) (m/n) , how old are you?” jeongin was taken aback by the question but answered nevertheless , “17—” “i'm older than you!” (m/n) exclaimed with a huge smile on his face , “ah.. sorry for speaking informally..” jeongin said , bowing. (m/n) stretched over the table and put his hand on jeongin's shoulder , “it's fine! let's speak casually.” he said.

the boys went on to talk for a whole hour until jeongin's phone buzzed , he took it out his pocket and looked at it while slurping his noodles.

( "minho" "I'm sorry, Jeongin. I can't go to the ramen shop today.. OTL" )

jeongin sighed , putting his phone back in his pocket and standing up from his seat and leaving money on the table for the bill , “hm? where are you going?” (m/n) asked , also standing up. “oh , i have to go.. i was supposed to be here with a friend but he bailed , i might as well go home now.” jeongin said , giving a sad smile. he picked up his backpack from the seat next to him , putting it on his back , “bye (m/n)—” “wait!” (m/n) interrupted , “my number.. put it in your phone later , and call me when you get lonely.” he insisted, holding out a piece of paper with his phone number on it , smiling . “sure.. seeya (m/n).” jeongin said , taking the slip of paper and walking out the restaurant, waving towards (m/n).

(m/n) sat back in his chair , breathing in and out while clutching his shirt. “shit.. he was cute.” he said , getting back up and leaving the shop , but not before bowing towards the staff.

from then on , jeongin and (m/n) met up from time to time , and from time to time turned into every day after school. they hung out at night usually , grabbing snacks from a convenience store and sitting on a park bench to eat it to making out in (m/n)'s car in the middle of the woods.

(m/n) really brought jeongin out of his shell , he became more sociable and could speak up for himself more than before. no matter how many friends jeongin had , (m/n) was always his special someone. but of course— jeongin couldn't tell his kids this , they promised to tell nobody , it was their little secret.

—

“so— he was your best friend?” chae-young asked , “yeah , essentially.” jeongin said. his eyes glanced at the clock above the tv and he got off the couch , “girls , it's past bedtime , put the photobook up and head to bed , alright?” he said , walking into him and his wife's room. “yes!” the girls shouted , running off.

jeongin's wife was already fast asleep , so he just crawled into bed , pulling the covers up and laying on his side , staring into the white wall in front of him. it was quiet and jeongin didn't like it , so he closed his eyes and stayed as still as possible , letting his consciousness send him to sleep.

—

(m/n) and jeongin were sitting in his bed at his housde , holding each other's hands as they made out , tongues gliding against each other. jeongin started to take off his shirt and (m/n) took notice , helping him take it off. this continued for a while , the intimacy was overwhelming.

“boys! would you like som— MY GOD!” (m/n)'s mother opened the door , she was holding a tray of juice and a plate of cookies but it crashed to the ground. the boys turned their head to the door , and everyone was frozen in place. jeongin with his shirt off , (m/n) helping him , and (m/n)'s mother at the door frame , holding her hands to her mouth in shock.

she slammed the door shut and (m/n) threw himself off the bed and out the door , chasing after his mother. jeongin sat still on the bed , quietly collected his shirt and backpack , put them on and made his way out of the room. (m/n) and his mother were arguing , she was screaming at him and he was stuttering trying to explain himself. jeongin walked up to them and bowed at (m/n)'s mother before exiting the house , making his way to his home , embarrassed at the situation. he had no intentions of going back to (m/n)'s house after that embarrassment. (m/n) called his name from his house but jeongin was already halfway down the street at that point , he didn't turn to call back or walk back.

(m/n) and jeongin stopped seeing each other for a couple days until jeongin texted him , asking him to meet up at hangang park. when (m/n) made it there , jeongin was sitting on a bench , drinking a can of coffee that he got from a vending machine. (m/n) sat beside him and sat there quietly , looking at the atmosphere , the dogs , children playing and families in picnic's. “sorry.” he said , jeongin turning to him. “it's alright , i just left 'cause i was embarrassed.” (m/n) nodded. it was awkward. “i dont think i'll be going to your house again.. but your welcome to come to mine.” jeongin said , taking a swig from his coffee. “thanks.” (m/n) replied.

the couple shared happiness and more through their adolescent years , kisses , hugs , and bowls of ramyeon from mr. seo's shop. they even shared an apartment together. during their first years of college they bought an apartment together with their shared assets. their college days were busy , so busy infact that they stopped seeing each other for days on end to get work done. it caused a split in their relationship and there was no thread left to sow it back together.

it was no surprise that jeongin brought up the idea of breaking up with (m/n) , to which he objected.

(m/n) and jeongin were sitting on a beach , it was dark out and the sea smell filled their lungs. they were sitting side by side , (m/n)'s hand on jeongin's thigh, traveling upwards. "what are you doing.." jeongin asked , scooting. "feeling you up. what's wrong with that? i usually do it—" "not today (m/n)." jeongin interrupted , (m/n) looked at him like he was weird but said nothing. "i think we should take some time off." jeongin blurted. "time off of what?—' "this relationship" he said , (m/n) scrambled to his feet , the sand getting in-between his toes. "for what? were doing just fine!" he exclaimed. "were really not , (m/n)". jeongin said , getting onto his feet and crossing his arms. "we barely see each other , and it's getting uncomfortable living with you. i feel like were strangers." he admitted.

"then we can start seeing each other more!—" "NO!" jeongin hollered. "it's not that simple! that's hard for me (m/n)!" "how is it hard for you!?" they continued to argue , walking all across the beach and even near the sidewalk , (m/n) walked a little too far onto the road , and jeongin started hollering for him to move out of the way. but (m/n) walked with his ears covered and eyes closed like some idiot. "(M/N)! MOVE!" jeongin shouted. (m/n) couldn't hear him and stepped onto the road—

BAM !

—

"(M/N!)" jeongin shouted as he shot up from the bed , panting heavily. his wife awoke and began to ask him what's wrong , comforting him. jeongin pushed her arm away and went to the kitchen for some water. he grabbed a glass and turned on the faucet , letting the water flow into the cup , taking a sip.

jeongin put down his water and leaned against the counter , cupping his face. "fuck.." he said , ruffling his hair and emptying the cup into the drain , putting it into the sink.

he returned back to his bedroom to see his wife already asleep with a worried look on her face , he paid her no mind and just closed the door and got into bed. he laid there staring at the ceiling , listening to the clock from the living room tick.

tick. tick. tick. tick.

jeongin closed his eyes. trying not to let his memories relapse , he just wanted to sleep. to forget about (m/n).. but how could he? it was his fault he was dead. the truck hit (m/n) and it was his fault.

—

it was the day of (m/n)'s funeral , (m/n)'s mother was standing by his portrait , he had many guests coming to visit him. and of course , jeongin was there in his black tuxedo. he paid his respect and left the room quietly , going outside to sit on the steps. after a while of sitting there quietly , (m/n)'s mother came to sit right beside him , jeongin bowed towards her and they began to talk.

"he was a good man.. wasn't he? he was a little pushy but he was a good man.. that damned truck driver.." she said , tears flowing from her (e/c) eyes. jeongin patted her on the back ,

"yeah.. he was a good man."