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@ominous-signs

Official ominous sign(s)

Let’s all actually do this

posted in 2015 and then every single world event for the next 11 years has just felt like this exactly

this summer we WALK IN A RANDOM DIRECTION and NEVER STOP

it’s weird that professional letters are supposed to start with “dear.” i don’t even call my mom that

my darling hiring manager. my springtime rose. if hired i will bring a strong work ethic to this position

cleaned out the garage and found my old thinking cap from when i would think

he stole 1 penny from her hot dog cart and she chased him across the world and her hot dog cart sat there and nobody touched it out of respect

the hot dog stand was there for 100 years and nobody touched it out of respect and the rain didnt rain on it and the wind didnt blow it and time didnt decay it and 100 years later when she got her penny back the hot dog stand started coughing and the neighborhoods kids said whats wrong and it started coughing and said i dont have much time left and they said no and the hot dogs started smelling bad and the kids cried and the kids started smelling bad and the candles started smelling gioood

[lawyer voice] mothers and fuckers of the jury-

DO YOU KNOW HOW OFTEN I THINK ABOUT THIS POST??? IM IN LAW SCHOOL THIS POST IS GOING TO RUIN MY LIFE

reblog to ruin a law student’s life

Hi. I’m a trial attorney now and every last one of you is a motherfucker.

fish love me women also love me!! everyone love me!!! yayy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!