smeeless meeking

remember when linguini brought a rat he found back to his apartment and got all embarrassed and was like it’s not much. to the rat

you can't make adaptations of video games because either they're made by people who didn't play the game in which case it's a bad adaptation and it sucks or it's made by people who did play the game in which case it's made by gamers and therefore also sucks

float like a butterfly (nervously forgets end of quote) green like a pea

oh my god the slot machine company says i have to keep putting coins in their machine or Im Gonna Get Left Behind. thats so scary. and it has to be true because they know more about slot machines than i do

oh my god the slot machine company says if we dont give them money to build the world's biggest slot machine the chinese are gonna build it first and win all the prizes. and then there wont be any prizes anymore

high as fuck lowballing never worn baby shoe listings

can i make it through the worlds most overstimulating gorcery store before i shit my pants

july being tomorrow for the love of god this cant be happening.

yummytopia is a stupid fucking delicious city

i respect ppl who think frodo & sam were sucking & fucking constantly when the narrator wasn't looking. but personally i think the furthest they went was an awkward attempt at mutual handjobs one night in mordor which started as sam trying to do something anything that'd make frodo feel good & frodo insisted on doing it for sam too & sam closed his eyes & tried to imagine it was rosie cotton while frodo tried to remember the shire or focus on the texture of sam's rough hand or the unyielding heat in his own grip or think about anything other than the great burning wheel & neither of them succeeded. & frodo never got fully hard & eventually pushed sam's hand away but kept going & sam felt like he had failed & part of him wanted to push frodo's hand away too but instead he came harder than he had ever in his life & they never talked about it again

whenever I confess to people that i feel like I am just roleplaying as a normal person they're always like noooo you don't strike me as someone who's roleplaying as a normal person at all!!! :) and every time internally im like well yes that's because I am excellent at it

Unofficial Autism Post