Well I think you all look PERFECT!

"Okay Snoozles, I’ve put up with your wacky ideas before, but this is just crazy.”

It was another trip to the mall, which meant another day of Toph and Sokka making fun of white girls, checking out men’s fashion, sporting goods, video games, pet supplies, and most importantly, visiting the food court. He lived for this stuff; she tagged along for friendship’s sake. (Plus, making fun of him for asking “Hey Toph, how do I look?” was the greatest.)

So there they were, sitting idly in the food court scraping the last dregs of soda from their cups and picking at the burgers and chinese food and shotcakes that littered the table. It had been a long day, and Toph was ready to take a nap. But as she lazily pet Badgermole and scrolled through music on her phone, Sokka suggested something that made her want to punch a man (preferably Sokka) in the tit.

"I’m serious! Ty Lee won’t stop flirting with me, and at this point it’s starting to get weird. Like don’t get me started on what she does with bananas—"

UGH! Toph tuned out of the “”“sexy”“” details, focusing on her music instead. There was nothing quite the same as the boy you like telling you all about the other girls who liked him.

It was so stupid too! Of all people to have a crush on, it had to be that dumbass. Sokka, who couldn’t listen to that Sarah McLachlan song that was always in those save the puppies ads without bursting into tears. Sokka, who tried to bring home a baby raccoon, got bit by the mother, and had to go to the hospital. Sokka, who refused to move the radio station to anything but another oldies station. Like seriously, what was so wrong with Nicki Minaj?

And now, miracle of miracles, this dummy wanted to go on a date.

A fake date.

To avoid the affections of another girl.

Great!!!!

But hey, maybe this was gonna be a good opportunity. At any rate, she could completely piss off Ty Lee. That was always fun.

"Fuck— here she comes! Yes or no?"

So with a huff out of her nose, Toph stopped her music and grabbed Sokka’s hand from across the table. “You got a deal. Let’s make that bitch mad.”

"All right!" Sokka crowed, punching the air. "Have I ever mentioned how cool a friend you are?"

She gave him a sly smirk in response and ignored the fluttering in her chest. “Yeah, but keep mentioning it, boyfriend.”

And oh boy was Toph’s disability playing in Sokka’s favor at that moment. Because the last thing he wanted her to see was his face becoming redder and his smile growing bigger. Boyfriend.