One Doodle That Can't Be Undid...

He’s sitting on the edge of the bed, his hands rest heavy on his knees, fingers perfectly still. His eyes are wide, unblinking, fixed entirely on the curtains. He’s sinking, trapped in a gray fog where past regrets and future dread blur together into absolute nothingness.

Outside the open bedroom door, small sneakers squeak against the hallway tile.

Your five year old daughter stops in her tracks. She carries a stuffed dog by its ear, her eyes peeking into the bedroom. She watches her dad for a long moment.

He doesn't move.

He doesn't even seem to breathe.

She’s seen this look before.

She turns on her heel and runs back to the kitchen, where you’re leaning against the counter. She tugs sharply on the hem of your shirt, her brow furrowed.

"Mama," she whispers urgently, pointing a finger back down the hall. "Dada is doing it again."

Your heart aches slightly, but you don't let it show. You know exactly what she means.

You set down your mug, offering her a reassuring smile. "Is he? Well, let's go, sweet girl."

You scoop her up into your arms, settling her against your hip. She wraps her arms around your neck, burying her face for a second before looking toward the bedroom.

When you enter the bedroom, Andrew hasn't moved an inch. He looks entirely detached from his own body, a ghost sitting in a room he built.

You position her on Andrew's right, and you sit down quietly on the other side. The bed shifts, but he doesn't react.

"Hey," you say softly. "Look who found you."

Andrew doesn't turn, but a microscopic twitch in his jaw tells you he’s trying to fight his way back through the fog.

"Okay, careful, on three, babygirl," you whisper, leaning close to Andrew's side. She mimics you perfectly, leaning her small frame against his right side, her face inches from his cheek.

"One... two... three."

Simultaneously, you press a kiss to his left cheek while your daughter plants a loud and sloppy kiss on his right.

The physical contact snaps through him.

Andrew blinks rapidly, the dull film clearing from his eyes as a sharp breath hitches in his chest. His gaze lands on his babygirl's hopeful smile, and then at you.

The tension in his shoulders visibly melts away.

"There you are," you murmur, reaching up to gently cup the back of his neck, your thumb smoothing over his hairline.

Andrew swallows hard, his hand coming up to cover yours, pressing your palm firmly against his skin as if to convince himself you're actually there. He reaches out with his other arm, wrapping it securely around his daughter's waist and pulling her tightly into his chest. He buries his face in her curls, breathing her in, baby shampoo and sunshine, before looking back at you, his eyes clear and entirely present.

"I'm here," he rasps, feeling grounded.

Andrew shifts the toddler so she’s sitting right on his lap, her back pressed against his chest. His arms wrap around her.

She looks up at him. "You were gone, Dada."

"I was," Andrew murmurs, his voice softening. He gently tucks a stray curl behind her ear, his thumb brushing over her cheek. "But you brought me back."

She beams, entirely proud of her mission. She reaches up, her small hands grabbing both sides of his face, squishing his cheeks together. "Mama said we have to kiss the monsters away."

A smile breaks across Andrew’s face, crinkling the corners of his eyes. "Did she?" he asks, glancing up at you with softness.

"Mmhmm!" She nods solemnly, releasing his face to pat his nose. "Are they gone?"

Andrew catches her tiny hand in his, pressing a gentle kiss right into her palm. "Every single one. Thank you, bug."

She giggles, the sound bright and musical, and immediately squirms until she can bury her face in his neck, hugging him tightly.

“Jack. Jack…”

The man grumbles quietly in his sleep, never a morning person to begin with.

But that damn voice was one of a siren, luring him into the world of the living.

One eye slowly opens just as lips meet his jawline. It makes him hum, a bit more tempted to wake up now..

“Baby. I need you.” Y/N whispers, making him breathe in her scent more.

“Mm… Go ahead, baby. I’ll just lay here. You have my permission..” Jack mutters shamelessly. Y/N squeals at that, swatting his chest lightly. That jolts him awake.

“Ew! Not like that..” She fusses, making him smirk as he takes her in now. He pauses as he sees her outfit.

“What does this say about me? Does it say.. ‘successful doctor who’s got her life together’?” Y/N asks now as she steps back to give her boyfriend of almost four years a complete 360 of her outfit.

“Anything you wear says ‘successful doctor’, baby..” Jack assures gently as he leans on his elbow.

“Yeah, but… This outfit in particular..” Y/N says nervously as she motions towards it.

“Really nice.” He nods, still fighting off the sleep but trying to assure her. Y/N could spiral so quickly if not careful. His wife was a ball of nerves and panic. Running off of worst case scenarios and coffee.

And he loved her all the more for it…

“Yeah?” She whispers as she fidgets a bit with the hem of her blouse. Jack nods.

“Why are you dressed so nice?” He asks finally, deciding sleep could wait. He sits up more in the bed, watching as Y/N moves to their vanity to check her makeup.

“Well…” She begins nervously before turning to face Jack, a bright smile on her face. “My dad reached out..” She says. Jack’s soft grin instantly falls.

“What?” Y/N asks gently at the look on his face. “Oh, come on, Jack..” She sighs as she realizes what soured his mood..

“Y/N, that man..” Jack begins.

“Is my father.” Y/N finishes for him. “And he reached out last night to congratulate me finishing my residency..” She says bashfully. “He wants to take me out to breakfast, and I agreed..” She continues with a tone that showed she wanted to be mature about this. She wanted to be the bigger person.

It hurt Jack’s heart because Y/N was always being the bigger person. Always allowing people in and out of her life with a smile on her face. She had a bleeding heart, and Jack was always the one to clean up said blood when she was let down. He didn’t forget the last time he’d seen what mess her dad had left.

It was her first week at the Pitt when he’d walked into the break room and found Y/N sitting upset at the table, poking at a cold meatloaf from the cafeteria. Her dad had promised to take her out for dinner to celebrate her first week of work but the night of, claimed he had no money to do so and so he wouldn’t be going to see her. Even after Y/N claimed she could pay for it all, he still hesitated.

That night was terrible, yet.. It would count as more ‘bittersweet’. Because that was the night Jack took Y/N to his favorite pizza shop around the corner so he could celebrate with her.

And that’s the night the little crush between them began.

That night was four years ago.

Four years of building a life together and even getting hitched. It was a beautiful lakehouse wedding that was small enough to be intimate yet big enough to show they were loved by a bunch of friends and family alike. All but Y/N’s dad were in attendance.

They had not spoken to each other in all of that time, and suddenly he was back in her life to celebrate her becoming an attending at the ER? Jack called bullshit.

“Y/N..” Jack says softly with a sigh.

She turns to face him and he pauses to look at her. Really look at her. So much wants to leave his mouth. Warnings, logic, theories as to why her dad is popping up now. But his shoulders slump a bit when he sees her eyes.

Bright and big and happy.

He loved how she saw the world. Loved how she managed to keep herself open even with all she’s been through.

It’s what made her a damn good doctor and it’s what made him fall for her in the first place.

“Have fun.” He decides on finally.

He’ll be there.

The second she needs him, he’ll make sure he’s present. She smiles and moves closer to the bed to softly kiss his cheek.

“Go back to bed…” She smiles warmly. “I’ll see you at work later!” She adds as she grabs her jacket and rushes out of the bedroom. Jack sighs deeply, but stays awake.

Just in case she calls, needing him…

*

*

*

Jack had spent these four years trying to unteach the lessons Y/N had taught herself her entire life.

Like… If he said he was gonna do something, he’d do it. And if he forgot, she didn’t have to be scared to remind him. His word meant something. That took a good year and a half for her to fully learn.

Another thing was compliments. She didn’t owe him anything back for a compliment. He loved being able to make her blush with just a little phrase or two.

Flirting was an art to Jack.

And he did it well.

It was tricky with Y/N though because she never knew how to fully take it. She’d thank him, or try to deny it. Sometimes she’d try to turn it sexual just to feel like she’s repaying him. That took an entire two and a half years for her to stop doing.

A third thing was him assuring her that he’d always be proud of her. Jack knew what that sounded like. The age gap in their relationship, her family issues, the fact that she’d melt at any praise from him. It was the cliché ‘Daddy Issues’ trope, but they were so much more than that.

Jack likes to believe that even with a different upbringing, he and Y/N would always be a thing. One of life’s many common pairings, up there with peanut butter and jelly or bees and honey.

With a heavy sigh, Jack walks over to the nurse’s station. He was running on three hours of sleep. He’d stayed up on the off chance Y/N would need him during breakfast with her dad, but it was now 5pm, and he made up his mind that he’d just head into work now. Find an empty room and steal some hours of shut eye..

Maybe he could find Y/N too and ask how breakfast had went. Robby looks up from his iPad, raising an eyebrow from beyond his tilted down reading glasses. “You look questionable at best..” He notes.

“Be nice.” Jack snorts.

“That was me being nice.” Robby jokes back as he sets down his iPad before moving closer to pat Jack’s back. “What’s up?” He asks.

“Eh.. Long morning. Y/N’s dad reached out today. Just.. I’m on guard.” He shakes his head a bit.

“He’s that bad?” Robby asks curiously as Jack only shakes his head, not wanting to get into it..

“How’s the planning?” He asks to change the subject.

“Going good. Food’s gonna start being delivered at around 9pm. Gives us time to set everything up in the break room..” Robby nods as Jack sighs happily. At least the surprise party he was throwing for Y/N was still on track.

The two men begin walking down the hallway together as Jack goes through the list one more time. Drinks, food, a cake. “The banner!” Jack says as if just remembering.

“Dana’s picking it up with the cake. You’re worrying too much, man. It’s gonna go great..” Robby assures as they walk past a room. Jack hears Y/N’s giggle.

He stops instantly, looking into the room to see Y/N doing work on the computer while her dad sits happily in the bed.

“Y/N..” Jack says as she looks over. She smiles brightly at him.

“Jack. You’re here early.” She notes with a soft tease in her eyes. He moves closer to give her a side hug. PDA was kept to a minimum at work. At the request of Gloria. But the two would sneak little touches where they could.

“Dr. Y/N.” Robby greets, smiling as he uses her official title. “Congratulations..” He says softly. She blushes shyly at the title change.

“Thank you, Dr. Robby.” She says gently with a polite nod.

“What happened here?” Jack asks, eyeing Y/N’s father.

Terrance. ‘Terry’ for short.

The man gives Jack a curt smile. Jack doesn’t even attempt to return it..

“My dad told me at breakfast that he’s been feeling off lately. I made him come in here so I can take care of him..” Y/N smiles at her dad. Jack clenches his jaw a bit.

There it was.

The reason for his call.

A quick, cut in line, check up by his newly appointed doctor daughter.

“She insisted. I think I’m in good hands, right?” Terry tries joking.

“The very best..” Robby nods certainly.

“Y/N? Can I talk to you?” Jack asks softly, nodding for her to follow him out of the room.

Y/N pauses in confusion before smiling softly at her dad, mouthing a soft ‘one second’ while lifting her index finger up before following Jack outside.

“What exactly is he here for?” Jack asks finally once they’re far away from the room.

“Just a full check up. He hasn’t had one in a while because of his job. It’s.. All over the place.” Y/N waves a hand as if not wanting to get into that.

“So is he going to work out a payment plan? Has he met with Hastings?” Jack asks, arms crossing as he eyes a now sheepish looking Y/N.

“He’s gonna pay for this, right?” He asks slowly.

“Jack, he’s my dad. And he’s going through a lot right now. I told him I’ll cover it.” Y/N says finally. “It’s the least I can do. You know, he said it hurt him that I didn’t call. I.. That was such a bad thing to do as a daughter. His only daughter, mind you.” She says softly.

Jack shuts his eyes to keep his anger in. He wasn’t mad at Y/N. Of course not. He was mad that she had once again turned setting a boundary into a bad thing. “What about him?” Jack asks simply. Y/N pauses in confusion.

“What about him?” She asks back.

“He didn’t call either.” Jack points out.

“Jack..” Y/N tries.

“We invited him to the wedding, heard nothing back.” Jack continues unapologetically.

“He said he didn’t know if I really wanted to see him.” She mutters, but he knows that tone. She doesn’t wanna think about that part of it. “And.. The phone works both ways..” She adds quickly.

Those words aren’t hers. He can tell.

“Plus..” She continues after a moment. “He explained it all during breakfast. He said that he was waiting for me to cool off and reach out to him..” She shrugs.

“Why is that your job?” Jack asks.

“I’m an adult now, Jack. Just like him.” She defends.

“You’re still his child. You’re never supposed to be more adult than him.” Jack says firmly, letting some of his anger slip now.

Y/N frowns deeply at that, slowly crossing her arms as she fidgets with her footing now. Jack sighs as he realizes his statement. But he stands by it. So the automatic urge to apologize is pushed down.

“After all his tests are done, he’s taking me out for dinner. And I’d love for you to join us..” Is all she whispers before walking away again, leaving Jack pissed and regretful..

*

*

*

Jack makes it clear to everyone in the ED that if Terry makes any move, he should be first to know about it.

He stays alert, running only on coffee and the intense duty to protect Y/N at all cost. Hours pass of no reports back and from his quick glances at Y/N as she maneuvers through the halls, he assume Terry is on his best behavior.

Then it happens.

It’s been a busy day, so tests and labs were running behind, but it’s reaching the 9pm mark when Y/N officially discharges Terry with nothing of concern to report. She promises to be fast grabbing her things and then they could go out to eat.

It’s Dana who notices how Terry goes to grab his jacket the minute Y/N leaves.

It’s Robby who stands in the doorway so he can’t go.

And it’s Jack who steps inside the room when he finishes with a prior patient.

“Doing better?” Jack asks, voice tense. Terry pauses at the sudden break in his silence. He hadn’t noticed Robby and Dana camping outside the door because he’d been busy on his phone, texting someone.

He looks up fast and realizes it’s Jack standing there. He chuckles a bit and pockets his phone. “Oh! Jake!” He greets softly with a polite nod.

“Jack.” Jack corrects, arms crossing.

“Right.” Terry mutters. “All the results are perfect, so.. Imma head out now.” He says simply.

“What about dinner?” Jack asks, raising an eyebrow.

“What?” Terry asks as if trying to play dumb. Jack stares him down. “Oh. Oh, right. Dinner.” He says, realizing Jack won’t be backtracking.

“Yeah, I uh.. Work. Came up. I can’t do it tonight.” Terry says. “Y/N understands.” He nods.

“So you told her?” Jack asks.

“Eh.. No, but she gets it. I’m a busy man. I’m sure you know a thing or two about that. Y/N says you roll with SWAT.” Terry chuckles, trying to come off friendly.

“Why don’t you stay and tell her.” Is all Jack says. It’s phrased like a suggest.

It’s not.

“Oh. No. No, Y/N’s a good girl, but she can get… Real sensitive. I’m sure you know. Always putting on a big show..” He tries to laugh it off, but it’s clear on Jack’s face that he’s not entertaining in the slightest.

Terry clears his throat a bit. “Yeah..” He sighs. “She’s uh.. She’s always been like that. It’s best to just.. Go quietly.” He shrugs like it’s no big deal.

Jack nods slowly. “Okay.” He says. Terry smiles warmly at him and grabs his jacket. Jack steps in his way before he can make it to the door though.

“But you aren’t coming back.” Jack says, voice quiet and tense. Terry pauses at the statement.

“Excuse me?” He asks.

“You leave her life tonight.. You stay out of it. Forever.” Jack repeats.

Terry stares at him as if stunned. “That is my daughter. I’ll come in and out as I damn well please. I clothed her, fed her, put a roof over her head. I was a damn good father.” He defends.

“You’re a shit excuse for a father.” Jack says with no hesitation. “And a worse one for a man.” He snarls a bit.

Terry blinks in shock at that, opening his mouth to argue back, but Jack continues. “Clothes, food, and shelter? You did the basic shit, and what? You think she owes you an open door for life? You ruin her every time you choose to come around again. And that ends today. You leave, you fucking stay out. This isn’t about your daughter anymore. This is about my fucking wife, and if I see you around her again, I’ll break your jaw and happily fix it just to break it again. Do you understand?” He asks darkly, staring the man down.

Terry shakes his head that. “She sure knows how to pick em..” He mutters as he goes to walk past Jack.

“Fucking lying bitch..” Jack hears the man mutter under his breath and that breaks him.

“Terry?” Jack calls, turning. Terry turns to face him only to be met with a right hook.

The force knocks the man to the floor and Dana and Robby quickly rush in to the room at the thud. “Call the cops! Call security!” Terry shouts to Dana and Robby as he holds his jaw while laying on the ground.

Jack flexes his hand. His knuckles were definitely gonna show that hit soon..

“Why?” Dana asks.

“Why?! He hit me!” Terry says as he gets himself up.

“He did?” Dans asks.

“Or did you attack him?” Robby continues, making it very clear how this could go down.

“I don’t think you wanna be sedated, Mr. Y/L/N…” Dana says softly. Terry stares in shock at all three of them before shaking his head in disbelief and storming out of the room.

With him gone, Dana goes back to setting up the break room and Robby asks if he’ll he needed. When Jack assures him that he’s got it from here, he leaves too.

Jack rolls his shoulders, preparing himself…

“Okay, so I have a huge craving for…” Y/N pauses as she walks into the hospital room, smile slowly fading as she sees the empty hospital bed and Jack standing there..

“Where… Where’d my dad go?” She asks softly as Jack shifts a bit on his feet, hands slowly and nonchalantly sliding into his front pockets to hide his hand which he knew was starting to bruise now..

“He uh..” Jack rocks back and forth on his feet. “Business call.” He finally lands on softly. “He had to go. I’m sorry, honey..”

Y/N watches his face closely, slowly moving to wrap her arms around herself as she lets his words sink in. She nods slowly, as if understanding what’s not spoken. “Why do you all make that face?” She finally whispers after a good moment or so of just.. Standing in the tense silence.

“What face-“ Y/N cuts Jack off.

“My mom used to make that face.” She says softly as she ignores the feeling of her stomach dropping. “Like.. When I was 6 and waiting for him to pick me up for the father/daughter dance. Or.. After my high school graduation. Hell, even during my sweet 16..” She tries to chuckle but her eyes are already welling up.

Jack frowns deeply.

“You all make that.. Grimace. Like.. I’m a kid finding out Santa’s not real by accident.” She teases quietly as the tears finally spill over.

Jack approaches instantly.

“I’m a big girl..” She mutters through the tears. Jack only nods along as he finally wraps his arms around her. “I can handle it..” She mutters, still trying to maintain a casual attitude even as she lets the tears fully overtake her, allowing Jack to yank her close so she can cry into his shoulder..

He silently kisses the top of her head, holding her while she lets it out..

*

*

*

“Jack.. Where are you taking me?”

He moves her through the streets of Pittsburgh, smirking as he holds her by the waist, wanting to move fast while she still has on the blindfold.

“You’ll see..” He assures gently.

“Baby, if this is the party, I.. I’m not in a party mood.” She tries.

“It’s not..” He chuckles before pausing. “How did you even know about that?” He asks.

“You’re really not good at keeping things a secret..” She chuckles a bit despite her sensitive state.

Jack playfully rolls his eyes at that and ushers Y/N into the establishment. She pauses at the scent that hits her nose. She opens her mouth but he’s already taking off her blindfold. She pauses as she sees their standing in the pizza shop. Their usual booth is set up as a candle light dinner with rose petals along the table top.

“Wha-“ Jack cuts her off.

“Still not good at keeping secrets?” He jokes gently as she turns to face him.

“I thought it was a party in the break room?” She whispers.

“It was. Still is. But… You deserve something a bit more quiet tonight.” He states gently as she sheepishly eyes him. He was right. She’d cried herself into this state of exhaustion. One that he practically held her up throughout, whispering that he had her. That he loved her. When she was back to normal breathing, he’d encouraged her to put on a blindfold and let him lead the way.

But he hadn’t taken her to the break room. Their coworkers could enjoy the cake and food. No, he wanted to take Y/N to the place where they had their first date. Their first kiss, the place he’d proposed to her at.

“Texted Franky. He agreed to get it done in five minutes, tops..” Jack begins as the owner smiles from behind the counter.

“Congrats, Y/N!” He calls over. Y/N chuckles bashfully, mumbling a shy thank you back. The two sit down in the booth together.

“Thank you…” Y/N whispers tenderly.

“Y/N..-“ She shakes her head.

“You’re always in my corner. You make it… Look so easy..” She mutters. Being loved by Jack felt so good. But it also hurt. Because he made it look effortless. Like it wasn’t hard to adore her. Why did her father find it so tricky?

“Because it is. Loving you.. Y/N, it’s the best part of my life..” He states simply.

“Why can’t my dad…” Her voice breaks a bit as she pouts slightly, looking down at the table.

“That’s not you.” Jack says simply. “Baby. Look at me.” He states. She slowly does, eyes watery again as he watches her with warm and tender eyes.

“That’s not.. You.” He states slower. “Something is obviously wrong with him.” He declares.

“Jack..” Y/N tries, thinking he’s just saying that.

“No. Because.. Anyone who can go.. Even a day without talking to you? And feel fine? That.. That’s not a sane person.” Jack states simply.

Y/N sheepishly wipes her tears away as she chuckles despite herself.

“I go an hour and I.. I think I’m going crazy..” He adds simply as she grabs his face with both hands.

“I love you.” She whispers as he smiles softly.

“I love you. Doctor Y/N..” He proudly announces..