Togashi is Life, Togashi is Love

That was it, you told him. Now you just had to wait for his reaction. Hisoka was always the one taking charge in bed so you weren’t sure if he’d go along with what you wanted. Nevertheless he also seemed like the type to have tried everything. It could go both way.

Minutes stretched and no answer, but he did read your message. You were starting to get nervous, it’d have been fine if he had just refused, it was the wait that was killing you. You poured yourself another glass of wine, if you had to spend your night feeling awkward at least you should be properly drunk.

Half an hour after your last text your phone screen finally lit up, ‘What’s in for me?’ You reread his message again and again not really seeing where he was getting at.

‘If you’re not interested just say so.’ Vexed by Hisoka playing with you, you shoot another message; ‘Forget it’ and put your phone away.

The sound of the front door opening woke you up completely. Sitting straighter you turned you neck to see if you imagined the sound, it wasn’t like you to not lock your door when you were alone, but Hisoka appearing beside you distracted you for that last thought.

It’s not like you didn’t like when Hisoka was in charge, quite the contrary, but you just wanted to try something new for the both of you to have fun and there’s no point in it if he saw that as a transaction.

Sulking, you grabbed the remote, in a mood for some trashy TV, and decided to follow the advice you gave Hisoka and just forget about ever making the request. It was pretty late already and alcohol helping, you dozed off on the couch.

“Looks like you were enjoying your night~” He picked up your almost empty glass and poured wine for himself, drinking slowly before making himself comfortable on the couch with you.

“Hisoka?” You rubbed your eyes and looked at the time, it has been less than an hour since you sent your last message. So he was free after all. “Why are you here?” you slurred, alcohol affecting you more than you thought.

“I had the feeling you were sulking,” he gently grabbed you hand and guided your fingers to his mouth, nibbling and kissing them. “And I wanted to hear more about your suggestion.” His lips moved to the inside of your wrist, trailing up your forearm, igniting your already hot skin with every touch.

“You weren’t interested,” you said, instinctively giving him better access when he reached your neck.

“I’ve never said that,” Hisoka corrected, pausing his kisses, his hands hooking up your shirt to rest on your waist.

In the background the TV was still playing the reality show you were watching, Hisoka turned his attention to it when the contestants started arguing, chuckling when one of them threw a nasty insult.

“You didn’t answer,” he added, his thumbs drawing circles on your hips but his eyes glued on the quarrel. The insulted contestant snapped and screamed, a fight about to break but someone intervened to separate them. Hisoka returned his attention to you, his hands gliding toward your chest. “What’s in for me?”

You really weren’t in a state to make a pitch sale, feeling dizzy with the wine and Hisoka caresses and still annoyed that he would treat your proposition as a favor. “I told you to just forget it. You wouldn’t be bargaining if you were really tempted.”

Hisoka picked the handcuffs, turning them around in his hands for a moment before turning his attention to the ball gag. The silence was awkward, well awkward for you, he seemed engrossed in his scrutiny of your new toys.

One rejection was enough for one night, you wanted to drop the subject and just forget about your attempt at being bold.

With a final kiss on your neck Hisoka moved away from you and walked to your room. Not sure what he had in mind you got up and followed him. Heat rose to your cheeks when you saw him inspecting the toys still laid on your bed. The mood was definitely not right for the display.

“Like I said, it’s fine if you’re not interested,” you said when you couldn’t stand the silence anymore. You moved to take the gag out of his hands but he held it out of reach above his head.

“And like I said, I’ve never said I wasn’t,” he retorted. He threw the gag back with the rest and sit on the bed legs crossed. Looking at you in the eyes with a slight smile he explained, “I could lay down and pretend to be restrained by your cute handcuffs,” as he spoke he reached for you, taking your wrist in his hand and pulling you toward him, “but would it be fun for me? For you?”

Hisoka uncrossed his legs and you let him guide you to sit on his lap. “When I’m asking what’s in for me,” he continued in a soft voice, slowly removing your top. “I’m asking how are you going to make it interesting.”

You chewed the inside of your cheek. It’s not like you thought it would be mind blowing, but you didn’t imagine he’d find it boring. No, if you were honest with yourself you thought he was finding you boring already. You’d be the first to admit that you were pretty vanilla before meeting him, it hasn’t been long since you two started to see each others but it was painfully obvious that he has experienced way more than you did. Of course sex became significantly wilder since he appeared in your life and you were more than happy to follow his lead.

Yet that all you did. Following his fancy. Following his instructions. Never taking charge. So maybe that’s why you bought some toys on an impulse, maybe you wanted to show him that you were trying to match his pace. To please him. When you were with him, Hisoka has this way to make you feel like you were on top of the world and at the same time utterly inadequate to be deserving of his attention.

“I… I don’t know. I wanted to do something different.” you answered truthfully.

“The idea in itself isn’t bad, just need a bit of polishing,” he chuckled, kissing at your shoulder.

Laying you down on the bed he finished to undress you, his lips caressing you skin as he uncovered more of your body. With his tongue dancing on your stomach and making its way toward your chest your barely noticed when he lifted your arms above your head. It was not until you felt pressure around your wrists that you realized your hand were bound to the bed.

“Wha-” The gag placed in your mouth cut off your words. Hisoka put it in, careful not to pull on your hair when locking it around your head.