i wish people were nicer about the whole transgender thing

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i wish people were nicer about the whole transgender thing

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i think if we’re going to have conversations about consent we should talk about how consenting to something doesn’t necessarily mean it’s going to be a good experience, and having a bad experience doesn’t necessarily mean someone violated your consent. this can apply to a lot of situations but the two i’m thinking of right now are sex and transition.
you’re getting it on with someone. you enthusiastically consent to having sex with them. afterward, you feel a little weird about it. maybe even distressed. maybe they did something you didn’t enjoy and in the moment you just didn’t say anything. maybe you just realized after the fact that you were not in a good headspace for sex and now your mental health is declining. that doesn’t inherently mean the person you had sex with violated your consent. sometimes it just means you need to take a break from sex or work on communicating your needs or boundaries better during sex.
and with transition, i feel like this is something that gets consistently overlooked but like. there will never be zero detransitioners. there will always be people who decide that actually transition wasn’t right for them. they could have had the best most thorough doctors in the world who did everything by the book and got full informed consent at every step. and some people are still going to decide they don’t like the changes and wish they hadn’t transitioned. that doesn’t mean that the doctors violated their consent, and that doesn’t mean that transition shouldn’t be available to anyone. it just means that we need to have more resources available for folks who detransition.
regret does not automatically mean someone did something wrong. regret is simply one possible result of having bodily autonomy, and i think we need to get more comfortable with that.
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U know whats crazy abt bdaddy jissues. Theres all the stuff about BJ never mentioning his parents or writing to them and the Interesting Jokes he makes about them while referring to pegs dad as ‘pa’ and the lashing out at hawkeye for having a good relationship with his dad. Theres also like everything about the way that he is. The burying and repressing and smiling. The flinching. The LYINGGGGG the projecting. Lets go back to childhood. What is it about the house you grew up in that made you the way you are. I know what it is.
AND the obsession w being a good husband and father AND the obsession with following rules and life will reward you AND the way he initially adheres to strict army policy before being opened up like a beautiful gay flower by another beautiful gay person WHILE ALSO being so mixed up in his own head about being a good husband father following rules so life will reward you strict upbringing policy that he sometimes still treats said beautiful gay person like hes a crazy slut from hell not that hell is real or that im scared of going there at all hahaha anyway.
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