sweet mother of salad

i must not kill myself . killing myself is the myself killer

i can't keep living like this!!! [does not change a single aspect of my life]

this used to be the oldest bar in texas until they built an older one

You just hate me because the patterns on my clothes move around like they do on chowder and yours don’t

waters so amazing because you can drink it really sloppy style and like spill it all over yourself and it doesnt even leave a stain. you dont even have to wash it out/ . because its already washed

It's important to humble male celebrities with the fact that they are laying eggs on ao3

death penoty

This video lives rent free in my head

Did a nuclear fucking bomb go off in that second one

me coming home to my gamer wife and children: greatest of keks everyone, score any sick headshots today??? oh thank you honey I’d love a bowl of soda soup, please don’t get triggered if I don’t like it this time

Zelda sweetie, you’ve hardly touched your Doritos. What’s got you so butthurt?

I HATE THIS LAMAOSDOASD