Holeanov

the “i don’t know that side of you at all” line is so underappreciated because it’s really the first time ilya has revealed an insecurity to shane, something so ingrained in him by his father that he wears it like a second skin, and he positions it as a light-hearted joke but shane doesn’t get why he would say that about himself. shane meets him head-on, so earnest and sweet: i don’t know that side of you at all. i only know that you have put in relentless work to hone your craft and dominate your career. i pour everything into this sport and you’re the only one who can keep up—how could you be lazy. i made you pursue me for two years before we had sex and you never stopped. you could have anyone; you put in the work for me. every time we fuck you give and give and give. you’ve learned my body and figured out what i need because i never let myself. i don’t know that side of you at all.

Thinking about how Shane is the best person Ilya knows. Shane, who notices Ilya struggling with English and helps him without slighting him for it. Who asks to listen to his feelings in Russian without the benefit of understanding, just to let Ilya get his grief off his chest. How HE cooks for him, and takes care of him, indulging entirely in Ilya's company. Nobody else knows Shane's kindness like Ilya does. Nobody else knows how good he actually is.

Bear tattoo this, loon tattoo that... I imagine Shane with a very sensible, small lily flower tattooed on his ring finger meanwhile Ilya struts around with a PROPERTY OF SHANE HOLLANDER 24 tramp stamp