hiddeninthedata.carrd.co

Hello and welcome to my guide on how to LARP as a creepypasta fan! I don't know why anyone would ever want to LARP as a creepypasta fan when there are like, thirty other much better fan communities to LARP, but, hey! It's your life.

LARPing as a creepypasta fan is actually very easy compared to other fan communities! When you really boil it down to its most essential components, all you really have to do is to IGNORE. You're see what I mean the farther along you go in your LARPing journey.

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STEP ONE: Ignore any and all of the characters’ original creators’ wrongdoings and constantly talk about how people need to respect them (Sesseur, MadamBlackWolf, La-Mishi-Mish, et cetera et cetera)

Completely disregard any and all allegations (proven or otherwise) directed at the original creators and constantly talk about how their work should be respected. Do not mind if any of them have committed heinous actions. This goes ESPECIALLY for Sesseur. ALWAYS remind people that Sesseur is the “original creator” of Jeff the Killer and ignore ALL of his wrongdoings.

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STEP TWO: Constantly regurgitate opinions that haven’t been relevant since 2014.

Everytime you see anyone asking for “controversial opinions” or “things the fandom needs to accept,” make sure to ALWAYS regurgitate the EXACT SAME OPINIONS from 2010-2014 that haven’t been relevant for over a decade. Some examples include:

"Nina is not in love with Jeff, she wants to be Jeff. She is overhated." Completely ignore the inherent misogyny in hating young fangirls. Subtly imply that if Nina WAS a fangirl in love with Jeff, any hatred toward her would be justified. Also ignore the fact that Nina is currently one of the most popular and beloved characters

"Toby hates waffles." Ignore the fact that Kastoway himself made the comic about Toby liking waffles, and the original Toby character sheet where he was described as “stupid”, and that this was the character sheet being used when Toby first got popular. Also ignore the fact that very few people, if anyone, portrays Toby as a waffle loving idiot nowadays. Bonus points if you make up some bullshit headcanon about why Toby supposedly hates waffles, such as “his father really liked them and forced him to eat them”

"Jane should not be shipped with Jeff and has a wife named Mary." Ignore the fact that there are multiple different versions of Jane and only one, Jane Richardson, has a wife named Mary. As previously stated, you must also ignore the fact that Jane Richardson’s creator, MadamBlackWolf, is an AI “artist” who claims to be a professional and wrote Mary to have been a minor at the time Jane, an adult, was romantically interested in her.

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STEP THREE: Have a borderline fetishistic obsession with canon and realism. At the same time, make low effort realismslop grindark headcanons about how all the characters are vile and evil for no reason. Justify these headcanons by claiming that they are “confirmed canon” and “more realistic” at every turn.

Constantly claim that the “canon” of the original stories is better than “fanon” and always complain about people making their own interpretations and versions of the characters. However, DO NOT EVER READ ANY OF THE ORIGINAL STORIES. Instead, make shit up and pretend that you know more than you do.

I briefly mentioned this during the previous step, but do not just stop at Toby. Make bullshit, uncreative, uninspired, unnecessary, grimdark headcanons about how all of the characters are evil and vile for no reason and have no redeeming qualities. Make sure to COMPLETELY DISREGARD any of the initial appeal of the characters. You’d think this would contradict with our fetishistic obsession for canon, but it’s actually very easy to get away with this! Just claim that these lazy, uninspired headcanons are “canon” and made by the original creators, OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN.

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STEP FOUR: Make sure to make Slender the worst, most irredeemable, vile “character” of all of them.

Remember: Slenderman is NOT a character and he never should be. Slender is, at most, a plot device and should NEVER EVER be given any motivations outside of just being evil for no reason. In the event that you find someone who enjoys making him a wholesome father figure to the other pastas, constantly tell them that they’re stupid and not realistic.

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STEP FIVE: ALWAYS point out that Masky and Hoodie aren’t Proxies and/or Creepypastas EVERY CHANCE YOU GET.

Completely ignore the complete creative freedom members of this community have. If someone likes the idea of Masky and Hoodie being proxies, shut them down and berate them about them not being proxies within the Marble Hornets canon. If that person happened to write up an explanation for why Masky and Hoodie are present as proxies that aligns well with the Marble Hornets canon, continue to tell them that they are wrong and are never allowed to do anything canon divergent with Marble Hornets ever. 

ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS say that Marble Hornets has absolutely positively nothing to do with creepypasta and completely ignore how massive MH is to the legacy of Slenderman, a creepypasta character, and how the two were bound to mix eventually even without "rabid preteen fangirls."

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STEP SIX: Completely disregard the lack of canon in the community and constantly push your version of these characters on anyone who dares to interpret differently from you.

This is the final step, and fairly self explanatory. To be the best creepypasta LARPer, you MUST enjoy the smell of your own farts and have your head so far up your own asshole it is physically impossible for you to notice how much of a colossal dickhead you are to everyone else in the community who enjoys the less “realistic” and more lighthearted side of these characters. NEVER, EVER admit that you are in the wrong and always call everyone that disagrees with you and/or likes the more wholesome part of the community stupid, wrong, jobless, a preteen, or all of the above. 

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(OPTIONAL) STEP SEVEN (FOR MISOGYNISTIC REWRITERS): Constantly claim that your rewrite of the stories (especially Jeff the Killer) is the best version and anyone who dislikes it is stupid and doesn't understand good writing.

I especially recommend this if you're above the age of 25 and find gore (especially gore of women) hot. Make your own rewrite of the stories, particularly Jeff the Killer, and to a lesser extent, Ticci Toby. Constantly glaze it as the best thing to ever happen while overloading the story with gratuitous shock value gore, particularly of women, so you can jerk off to it.

If anyone EVER calls you out on your overinflated ego and/or raging misogyny, call them a soft and spineless idiot with bad taste and continue jerking off to the overly graphic female deaths in your story.

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Here are some of my favorites

They are celebrating a guy who basically stole Jeff, claimed it was his even if all he did was name it after himself. All these comments about “the original story” being BETTER and REALISTIC are fucking hilarious LMFAOOO you guys wanna call three sentences about a guy slipping on a bar of soap better than the story we already had from GFTV? Give me a fucking break 🥹

Ok but the original story of Jeff the killer is really cool and I think you should check it out on the villains wiki (cause the original creator has some triggering content on his deviantart like gore so be aware)

Jeffs original creator is a user by the name of sesseur! Compared to the story we all know this one is wayyy much different and personally I love it so much better. There’s not too much on the story since sesseur kinda let it be for some time but sesseur does answer questions about Jeff! And I love how the original Jeff if portrayed because of his realistic he sounds compared to the edgy one LMAO. I mostly based this look on other deviantart users artwork of Jeff because the way I saw him portrayed on there I love it! (And also in the OG story Jeff’s hair is dark but I love the blonde hair 😌🙌)

Pardon the long ass post but I am quite annoyed today and have little bandwidth for nonsense.

If you are coming on to my posts or blog or other social medias just to send hateful things about starlings, please go fuck yourself, seriously. Most people have been so kind, but as I gain more followers I have gotten some nasty stuff. Getting comments like "Probably looking for some native birds to kill 🙄" or "the only good starling is a dead one," or messaging me to tell me my birds should never have been saved is actually fucking unbelievable behavior.

Trust me, I am well aware that starlings are an invasive species in North America and other areas. I am a wildlife rehabilitator and educator - I have dealt with this for years. But starlings are not "evil" - and there is no such thing as an inherently evil animal. In many areas of their native range, starlings are struggling to survive, just like native species everywhere. And they do not deserve to be victims of torture and abuse just because humans intentionally brought them to places they shouldn't be.

There is a time and a place for conversation on invasive species management, but it is not here, on my blog about my beloved animals that are clearly in captivity. I will go further and say that invasive species control is absolutely necessary - but too many people seem to ignore that invasive species are still living beings that deserve to be treated with respect. Things like ethical euthanasia or reproductive control are great ways to manage invasive species without being inhumane.

My birds have seen the cruelty of humans. Iris was intentionally tortured, her sibling died tied to her with rope and her leg had to be amputated. Icarus was hit so hard with a net that her wing broke. I have had people bring me boxes of babies left to starve. I have had a fucking Northern Flicker brought to me riddled with bullet holes because they "thought it was probably a starling." I have had people intentionally try to adopt starlings from me solely for the point of murdering them.

An animal being invasive does not give you a free pass to be a fucking monster. Not to "put in a bag and shake it until it can't move and then use it to train my dog". Not to "break their wings and let the cats play with them." Hell, last year I had someone call me after trapping upwards of 30 starlings, demanding I come get them. When I told them that was not possible, they replied "Well, guess they will starve in the trap then. Let me know if you change your mind and want to save them." They continued to call with fucking UPDATES ON THE STARVING BIRDS. I had to block them.

Pardon my detailed descriptions but I need people to be aware how much fucking disgusting cruelty these poor things are subjected to. I am not breeding them, in fact I am literally removing them from the wild. They are still worthy of happy lives and medical care and food and shelter. Every example used in this post is something I have experienced fucking first hand.