(„• ᴗ •„)

how noisy are they? hetalia edition ♡

tags | smut , nsfw , masturbation , scenario , imagine , headcanons , axis & allies , accent kink , MDNI

author's note* here are my headcanons on what allies/axis sound like!! i'm planning to make another post like this but with the nordics. let me know if you'd like a version of this with the women!! or other select characters!

allies ♡

america has to take several breaths in the middle of jerking himself off. yes, even when it's just him he can tend to get way too excited. edging may not be his strong suit but in the short time he does spend touching himself, he imagines himself in front of someone he finds attractive, waiting for their next command.

has a surprisingly whiny moan, kind of like this.

england can be a little loud at times, other times not so much. mainly when it is not appropriate or acceptable to make such a raucous. as for whoever he's with, he'll also prefer to keep them quiet. (a hand across the mouth, perhaps) he likes to kiss them over and over to quieten his partner. he actually talks a lot during sex, albeit not without some serious stuttering. and though, he is most likely mentally kicking himself for doing so, his partner finds it cute.

when he tries to laugh the nervousness off, he sounds like this.

france likes to talk them through it, or rather, whisper because that is just so much more intimate. he makes sure his lover is comfortable and settled in before anything else happens. he could makeout for hours on end if it were possible—touching them through their clothes until they beg for him to finally start doing everything he told them he wanted to do.

his slow kisses make it feel as though it's been hours, and when he starts up it sounds like this.

canada tends to be grabby when he's with the person he really likes. he tries to at least be subtle in his protectiveness over that one special person. he sucks in a breath when he feels their body on his, desperately rubbing against his to cause some friction. he pulls them in closer, feeling their heat. he praises them, acknowledging the fact that they're not shy.

whenever he praises them, it might sound something like this.

russia seriously fights for his life when it comes to not being loud. he tries to moan as low as possible, which is much easier when he is on top. his voice is deep, and can be very loud when he is moaning. his partner insists that it is not a problem, but he'd truly be upset (and humiliated) if someone outside heard him. he likes to tease with his words, nearly mocking his partner. with a smile on his face, he'll tell them how adorably pathetic they sound for him.

he likes to call them cute nicknames in russian, just like this.

china doesn't care to feed into their accent/language barrier kink. so he tries to teach them chinese instead, even praising them for every word they can pronounce correctly. although, he does still find it sweet how they react whenever he calls them a nickname in his native language. he'd never admit it directly though, opting to call them silly for even liking such a thing. he then proceeds to give them a kiss, telling them to move on to the next part of their lesson.

he's very much a tease!! hoping they don't mind it too much when he sounds like this.

axis ♡

italy does whatever his love asks of him. he figures it'll keep him out of trouble if he does. he likes doing what pleases them. most of the time, anyway. if there is something that's kind of embarrassing for him, he'll whine about for a little bit until his love is able to remind them that he is all theirs and only theirs.

he's very, very cute whenever he sounds like this.

germany will explain everything he is doing or wants to do to his partner right before and as he is doing it. not too strict, but extremely disciplined in how he's working his hands over their body. he is able to coax out these short, low noises from their mouth. his touch makes them squirm, but he immediately holds them still. he's talking them down so they'll relax. giving him the green light to continue to touch them.

he's soft spoken, mostly speaking in german like this.

japan swallows loudly, happily so seeing as their tongue was just inside of his mouth. he kissed them so feverently, leaning forward to deepen it. enjoying the way they licked every part of his mouth. he feels so good it almost makes him dizzy. his partner will have to make sure to give him breaks in between for him to get some air. in the meantime, they put their hand to his chest, feeling his fast heartbeat.

he's cute, but out of shape—therefore not having a lot of stamina. he sounds like this.

prussia usually talks into their neck, or hair, when he's feeling a certain way. one time, his partner even brought it up to him that they can't hear what he's saying when he does that. he just grinned and shrugged. he told them it doesn't matter if they can't understand him, that they probably just like feeling his warm breath on their skin anyway. he talks them through everything, mostly saying vulgar things and praising how well they are taking him.

he can get cocky...but this is what he might sound like.

romano likes to edge his partner because it brings him satisfaction when someone else is feeling the same sexual frustration he often feels. he praises them when they do something he wants them to do and only after they do it. if they happen to touch him in a way he especially he likes, he'll demand they do it over and over. he believes there's nothing wrong with prioritizing himself sometimes.

...surely his partner can understand. he sounds like this.

💞Ships Week 2026: #1 – #20 💞

It's the big one! Welcome to the final day of ships week. Here are your top 20 ships of the last year, with the full list under the cut:

1. Byler +22 Will Byers & Mike Wheeler, Stranger Things

2. Spamtenna Spamton & Ant Tenna, Deltarune

3. Jayvik Jayce & Viktor, Arcane

4. Phan +4 Daniel Howell & Phil Lester, YouTubers

5. Sonadow +14 Sonic & Shadow, Sonic the Hedgehog

6. Hollanov Shane Hollander & Ilya Rozanov, Heated Rivalry

7. Polytrix Rumi & Zoey & Mira, KPop Demon Hunters

8. Buddie -1 Evan Buckley & Edmundo Diaz, 9-1-1

9. Destiel -4 Dean Winchester & Castiel, Supernatural

10. Krusie Kris Dreemurr & Susie, Deltarune

11. Caitvi +74 Caitlyn Kiramman & Vi, Arcane

12. Superbat +31 Superman & Batman, the DC Universe

13. Pureshadow* Pure Vanilla Cookie & Shadow Milk Cookie, the Cookie Run franchise

14. Stobotnik Agent Stone & Dr. Robotnik, Sonic the Hedgehog

15. Radiostatic Alastor & Vox, Hazbin Hotel

16. Gelphie Glinda Upland & Elphaba Thropp, Wicked

17. Pazzi Paige Bueckers & Azzi Fudd, WNBA players

18. Radioapple -12 Lucifer Morningstar & Alastor, Hazbin Hotel

19. Bucktommy -7 Evan Buckley & Tommy Kinard, 9-1-1

20. Hannigram -7 Hannibal Lecter & Will Graham, Hannibal

Characters/Relationships: Germany, Italy, Gerita

Pages: 3

Warning: None

another archie comic panel redraw

I’ve had two different types of practitioners tell me this ermmmmm what the fuh reak!!!!!!