joaquin diego (eviistarz)

creepypastaaaaaaaaa oh man

support ya boy and reblog today, dont ask why ben has a knife i just thought it looked cool

i wanted to draw him with short hair so bad:(

i still like sketches more

Hello and welcome to my guide on how to LARP as a creepypasta fan! I don't know why anyone would ever want to LARP as a creepypasta fan when there are like, thirty other much better fan communities to LARP, but, hey! It's your life.

LARPing as a creepypasta fan is actually very easy compared to other fan communities! When you really boil it down to its most essential components, all you really have to do is to IGNORE. You're see what I mean the farther along you go in your LARPing journey.

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STEP ONE: Ignore any and all of the characters’ original creators’ wrongdoings and constantly talk about how people need to respect them (Sesseur, MadamBlackWolf, La-Mishi-Mish, et cetera et cetera)

Completely disregard any and all allegations (proven or otherwise) directed at the original creators and constantly talk about how their work should be respected. Do not mind if any of them have committed heinous actions. This goes ESPECIALLY for Sesseur. ALWAYS remind people that Sesseur is the “original creator” of Jeff the Killer and ignore ALL of his wrongdoings.

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STEP TWO: Constantly regurgitate opinions that haven’t been relevant since 2014.

Everytime you see anyone asking for “controversial opinions” or “things the fandom needs to accept,” make sure to ALWAYS regurgitate the EXACT SAME OPINIONS from 2010-2014 that haven’t been relevant for over a decade. Some examples include:

"Nina is not in love with Jeff, she wants to be Jeff. She is overhated." Completely ignore the inherent misogyny in hating young fangirls. Subtly imply that if Nina WAS a fangirl in love with Jeff, any hatred toward her would be justified. Also ignore the fact that Nina is currently one of the most popular and beloved characters

"Toby hates waffles." Ignore the fact that Kastoway himself made the comic about Toby liking waffles, and the original Toby character sheet where he was described as “stupid”, and that this was the character sheet being used when Toby first got popular. Also ignore the fact that very few people, if anyone, portrays Toby as a waffle loving idiot nowadays. Bonus points if you make up some bullshit headcanon about why Toby supposedly hates waffles, such as “his father really liked them and forced him to eat them”

"Jane should not be shipped with Jeff and has a wife named Mary." Ignore the fact that there are multiple different versions of Jane and only one, Jane Richardson, has a wife named Mary. As previously stated, you must also ignore the fact that Jane Richardson’s creator, MadamBlackWolf, is an AI “artist” who claims to be a professional and wrote Mary to have been a minor at the time Jane, an adult, was romantically interested in her.

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STEP THREE: Have a borderline fetishistic obsession with canon and realism. At the same time, make low effort realismslop grindark headcanons about how all the characters are vile and evil for no reason. Justify these headcanons by claiming that they are “confirmed canon” and “more realistic” at every turn.

Constantly claim that the “canon” of the original stories is better than “fanon” and always complain about people making their own interpretations and versions of the characters. However, DO NOT EVER READ ANY OF THE ORIGINAL STORIES. Instead, make shit up and pretend that you know more than you do.

I briefly mentioned this during the previous step, but do not just stop at Toby. Make bullshit, uncreative, uninspired, unnecessary, grimdark headcanons about how all of the characters are evil and vile for no reason and have no redeeming qualities. Make sure to COMPLETELY DISREGARD any of the initial appeal of the characters. You’d think this would contradict with our fetishistic obsession for canon, but it’s actually very easy to get away with this! Just claim that these lazy, uninspired headcanons are “canon” and made by the original creators, OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN.

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STEP FOUR: Make sure to make Slender the worst, most irredeemable, vile “character” of all of them.

Remember: Slenderman is NOT a character and he never should be. Slender is, at most, a plot device and should NEVER EVER be given any motivations outside of just being evil for no reason. In the event that you find someone who enjoys making him a wholesome father figure to the other pastas, constantly tell them that they’re stupid and not realistic.

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STEP FIVE: ALWAYS point out that Masky and Hoodie aren’t Proxies and/or Creepypastas EVERY CHANCE YOU GET.

Completely ignore the complete creative freedom members of this community have. If someone likes the idea of Masky and Hoodie being proxies, shut them down and berate them about them not being proxies within the Marble Hornets canon. If that person happened to write up an explanation for why Masky and Hoodie are present as proxies that aligns well with the Marble Hornets canon, continue to tell them that they are wrong and are never allowed to do anything canon divergent with Marble Hornets ever. 

ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS say that Marble Hornets has absolutely positively nothing to do with creepypasta and completely ignore how massive MH is to the legacy of Slenderman, a creepypasta character, and how the two were bound to mix eventually even without "rabid preteen fangirls."

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STEP SIX: Completely disregard the lack of canon in the community and constantly push your version of these characters on anyone who dares to interpret differently from you.

This is the final step, and fairly self explanatory. To be the best creepypasta LARPer, you MUST enjoy the smell of your own farts and have your head so far up your own asshole it is physically impossible for you to notice how much of a colossal dickhead you are to everyone else in the community who enjoys the less “realistic” and more lighthearted side of these characters. NEVER, EVER admit that you are in the wrong and always call everyone that disagrees with you and/or likes the more wholesome part of the community stupid, wrong, jobless, a preteen, or all of the above. 

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(OPTIONAL) STEP SEVEN (FOR MISOGYNISTIC REWRITERS): Constantly claim that your rewrite of the stories (especially Jeff the Killer) is the best version and anyone who dislikes it is stupid and doesn't understand good writing.

I especially recommend this if you're above the age of 25 and find gore (especially gore of women) hot. Make your own rewrite of the stories, particularly Jeff the Killer, and to a lesser extent, Ticci Toby. Constantly glaze it as the best thing to ever happen while overloading the story with gratuitous shock value gore, particularly of women, so you can jerk off to it.

If anyone EVER calls you out on your overinflated ego and/or raging misogyny, call them a soft and spineless idiot with bad taste and continue jerking off to the overly graphic female deaths in your story.

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