hexpresso

Reblog this if you want readers to come into your ask box and ask for the “director’s commentary” on a particular story, section of a story, or set of lines. 

Instead, they just pulled the plug on any tiny bit of power you had running to your necessary brainwaves and put you into longterm shutdown mode.

But then....you grew up...with only that method for coping ingrained into you. So no matter how much you may know logically, now, that you have to have the "fun/interesting/challenging" cord plugged in for your brain to have any juice at all, you feel guilty for having to plug that in FIRST instead of as a reward for doing Adulting. So you just sit there, unplugged, not getting anything done.

People used to comment on fanfiction.

People used to comment on fanart.

People used to comment on OCs.

I hate "content" culture.

I hate "consuming content" and scrolling immediately to the next thing.

People used to be excited about the art that other people created.

People used to want to share that excitement with creators.

I spent countless hours reading and rereading tags full of love people left under my art. All the people i could gift a laugh to or even inspire with something I made mean more to me then you could ever know.

It's what makes me proud of my art!

PACING IS ABOUT LOAD BEARING WALLS.

All I will add is: WRITE THOSE BREAKFAST SCENES if you want to, they can be absolutely critical in getting a handle on your characters. Or even on the setting. Write them all to fuck. Go hogwild.

If you can’t imagine your character in silly or embarrassing situations without feeling very personally offended; take a step back, kick your character off their pedestal and let them breathe.

Let them feel and react in the same way you and others do. Let them laugh at dumb things, let them trip and fall on their face a few times. Let them experience life.

If x charity aims for £10, but gets £15, would you expect then to give back the extra five or give it then to another charity? No. Any extra costs go into the “rainy day” fund; sometimes servers crash or break, sometimes false reports are made that require the legal team, sometimes you need to hire coders or what not to implement new features or fix bugs or deal with broken code … 

The money they aimed for is the bare minimum, which goes towards things like basic server costs and domain names and legal advice and so forth, but they don’t just “pocket” the rest (as people claim). It’s not a business. It has no advertisements. It needs some “rainy day” cash to function. 

You can’t ask a charity to give money to another charity. 

They don’t “pocket” excess money. They have a publicly accessible budget - waaaay more info than most charities, in fact. In it, you can clearly see where each dollar goes. (Also, you are vastly underestimating either how much traffic AO3 gets or how much servers/hosting costs.)                    

In my experience, people who don’t work in web design and hosting just have no concept of how heavy a load something like AO3 would have. Not only is the traffic absolutely buck wild, but the quantity of data that archive needs to store is fuckoff crazy. I’m talking “more than the library of congress” crazy. The only reason it doesn’t require Netflix levels of data serving is that it’s text based rather than video.

AO3 is in the top 300 websites in the world, and the top 100 in the US. It is the number 2 literature website.

Number 2 in the entire world. JSTOR is 20.

It sees about 6 million people a day. About 250k an hour. Each of those people is loading multiple pages, many are running searches that execute on literally hundreds of potential variables per search. The demands involved are astronomical.

JSTOR, btw, makes 85 million dollars a year.

It’s 18 ranks below AO3′s traffic, and takes in 650 times the amount of money.

But let’s say you think that’s an unfair comparison. Would you say that the Project Gutenberg Literature Archival Group- another text based archive that handles literature operating outside traditional copyright requirements- is more similar?

Because it sees all of 4% of the traffic that AO3 handles.

Care to guess its budget?

Double that of AO3.

AO3 is doing shit on the kind of shoestring budget that I fully, 100% cannot comprehend. And that’s just the archival service.

The 130k also pays for the OTW’s legal team, which they use to defend the right of fandom to fucking exist.

Exploring good traits gone bad in a novel can add depth and complexity to your characters. Here are a few examples of good traits that can take a negative turn:

1. Empathy turning into manipulation: A character with a strong sense of empathy may use it to manipulate others' emotions and gain an advantage.

2. Confidence becoming arrogance: Excessive confidence can lead to arrogance, where a character belittles others and dismisses their opinions.

3. Ambition turning into obsession: A character's ambition can transform into an unhealthy obsession, causing them to prioritize success at any cost, including sacrificing relationships and moral values.

4. Loyalty becoming blind devotion: Initially loyal, a character may become blindly devoted to a cause or person, disregarding their own well-being and critical thinking.

5. Courage turning into recklessness: A character's courage can morph into reckless behavior, endangering themselves and others due to an overestimation of their abilities.

6. Determination becoming stubbornness: Excessive determination can lead to stubbornness, where a character refuses to consider alternative perspectives or change their course of action, even when it's detrimental.

7. Optimism becoming naivety: Unwavering optimism can transform into naivety, causing a character to overlook dangers or be easily deceived.

8. Protectiveness turning into possessiveness: A character's protective nature can evolve into possessiveness, where they become overly controlling and jealous in relationships.

9. Altruism becoming self-neglect: A character's selflessness may lead to neglecting their own needs and well-being, to the point of self-sacrifice and burnout.

10. Honesty becoming brutal bluntness: A character's commitment to honesty can turn into brutal bluntness, hurting others with harsh and tactless remarks.

These examples demonstrate how even admirable traits can have negative consequences when taken to extremes or used improperly. By exploring the complexities of these traits, you can create compelling and multi-dimensional characters in your novel.

this morning i thought i would talk about AUTHOR VOICE specifically when it comes to AUTISM. as autistic author i have learned to turn the dial up and down when writing characters. rose from CAMP DAMASCUS is basically exactly where i rest on spectrum and this shows in a few ways

in roses internal monolog you will see that she uses phrases like ‘my friend’ to talk about folks where neurotypical buckaroos might just use first name. or with her parents she will think of them in FIRST NAME instead of ‘mom’ or 'dad’. this is way many autistic buds THINK

to explain this trot I will say it is not a way of disrespect or anything like that, it is simply that these terms are TECHNICALLY all correct and interchangeable. socially, autistic buds often learn to mask by pinpointing WHEN to use these words that logically the same to us.

in CAMP DAMASCUS i left these things in to create character, but if you go back in my writing you will see it. in TINGLERS this is because they are honest in PUNK ROCK way. unfiltered expressions. in earlier novels its admittedly just because i did not realize it was unusual yet

point is, ROSES internal dialog in camp damascus is neurodivergent and i CHOSE not to change her thought process in this way, because we are BOTH autistic. this can be a risk because some neurotypical buckaroos will read it and just think ‘what a strange way. this is bad writing’

camp damascus reviews are actually very good it is a very well received book by any measure, but you will see some folks kind of making fun of these traits (i do not think they would do this if they knew it was authentic autistic way BUT we cannot educate EVERYONE on this trot)

POINT IS i am now faced with an artistic choice in later books. do i write with my AUTISTIC voice even though some neurotypical readers find it awkward? in technical sense some readers WILL think each book is better if i eliminate my autistic tendencies in later edits

my advice is this: character voice IS SO IMPORTANT, but a big part of writing is finding the place between YOUR voice and your CHARACTER voice where both are authentically existing in some way. like acting, you are always bringing something of yourself even when you 'disappear'

when writing BURY YOUR GAYS i did not plan to make misha on the spectrum, but misha is part of me and i am on the spectrum. what i have realized over time is that ALL OF MY CHARACTERS will have these traits in some way because i wrote them, and i will never disappear completely

so when edits came for BURY YOUR GAYS and misha, i took that dial and i turned it farther towards neurotypical than i did with rose, BUT I DID NOT TURN IT OFF COMPLETELY. in literal sense, i left some of those ‘my friends’, because i will always bring MY VOICE to my art as well

i am proud of being on the spectrum. while my voice may not hit every convention of ‘good writing’ it is authentically ‘MY writing’ and i think that is more important than any outside checklist for ‘correct literary expression’. and guess what THE RESULTS ARE IN, MY BOOKS DO WELL

so if you are an artist getting feedback or reviews, consider which parts you can LEARN FROM and grow and change, and which parts are just AUTHENTICALLY YOU. because while your honesty may defy conventions and seem unusual to some folks, IT IS OFTEN WHAT MAKES YOUR ART SING

"Jenny, pick some apples, please! I'm going to make apple pie!"

“Mom, my name is Shadowheart,” the girl, dressed all in black, reminded her, but still went to fulfill her request. She wasn't even that fond of apples and apple pie, but her mood was too changeable at that age. Maybe she'll eat a piece later, doing her mother a favor; maybe she really will gobble it all up in one go with great pleasure and only make a face for show. She hasn't decided yet.

Life on a small farm was relaxed, but very monotonous: too boring. Jenny wanted something more interesting, like the mysterious rituals from horror films that her mother forbade her to watch in the evenings. But all that remained was to dream and write down interesting observations in a personal diary. Perhaps when she goes to university, everything will become much more cheerful than this dull farm life and she will leave here for a dormitory.

The apples were green and hard, just pick them and eat them now. These are just perfect for a pie: large and sour.

The girl took a basket with her to put it all in and put it under the tree. She jumped slightly to catch the branch and pulled it towards her.

"Ah-ah-ah!" someone yelled above her, because this branch served as part of his support, because of which someone not very large, but still very heavy, fell on Shadowheart from above, immediately crushing her with his weight.

"Aouch!" She lay down under the tree and rubbed her cheek next to her nose. A broken branch cut across her face and left a shallow cut, which immediately began to bleed slightly. "Get off me!"

The girl pushed the stranger off her and looked angrily in his direction. A boy appeared before her, a little shorter than her, with beautiful white curls, looking about fourteen years old, absolutely frightened either by her reaction or by the fact that he had been caught red-handed. One of the apples was clutched tightly in his hand.

"Are you stealing our apples?" She continued to frown, lifting him from the ground by his chest.

“N-no,” despite direct evidence of this, the boy continued to lie to her. He was almost half a head shorter than her and was truly afraid of Shadowheart. "You are beautiful."

He blurted out the first thing that came to his mind to defend himself - and he was right. This took the new acquaintance by surprise, and she let him go, feeling slightly embarrassed. The plan was a success. True, he himself did not yet understand whether he lied or actually found her attractive.

“Very funny,” Shadowheart took the apple from him. "Who are you and where are you from?"

"Astarion. From the Szarr estate. Please don't tell my stepfather that I was here!" according to his request, he was not very eager to receive punishment for such a thing. "I was going to leave home. I needed food with me…"

"From the Szarr estate?" Shadowheart was sincerely surprised. “But they buy everything fresh from our family. Why steal… Why leave home? It's such a luxurious estate there. Literally all of my classmates dream of living in it…"

Shadowheart hesitated.

"I heard that the owner of the house seems to have children, but I haven’t met anyone yet… Do you even go to school there or are you homeschooled?"

Astarion just sighed:

"Homeschooled. I really need to leave home…"

"Jenny, where have you gone?" her mother called, leaning out of the window of the house. Astarion tensed and hid behind a tree so that no one would see him.

"I'm coming now!" she answered her. “And I’m not Jenny,” she muttered under her breath with dissatisfaction.

"Who then?" he asked quietly from behind the tree.

"Shadowheart."

Having collected the required number of apples for herself, the girl nevertheless took pity on the new guest, who still did not leave, despite her threatening appearance, and left him several apples under the tree so that he would not have to climb up again.

After this meeting, she did not see him for a long time. Perhaps he really ran away from home. Perhaps he finally came to his senses and returned home. Every time she saw the Szarr estate from afar, she tried to guess what was happening there, if someone wanted to leave this luxurious place of their own free will. But still, Shadowheart chalked it up to a typical boyish desire to go on adventures after watching stupid cartoons. Although since then she wanted to get a little closer to the estate.

It physically pains me to see people post awesome fanfiction to tumblr and nowhere else. Tumblr moves so fast! By tomorrow people who didn’t look in a tag at the right moment won’t know it existed. By next week even people who did read it won’t be able to find it back to reread. Finding anything on tumblr via search function is practically a fluke. For all intents and purposes, your hard work has a halflife of about a week at most.

PUT YOUR WORK ON AO3 WHERE IT CAN LIVE ETERNALLY, I BEG YOU

People who come into that fandom in a month, a year, even a decade will be able to find your work!

People can bookmark it!

People can rec it to others!

People can reread it into infinity! (and people like me can do that and comment every time!)

You can get comments & kudos until the endtimes because people will keep finding your work! (seriously I still sometimes get new people finding and loving my work from ~2013)

And best of all, people can SUBSCRIBE to your work so they will get email about new chapters and stories! (I’m seeing people do manual ‘Tag you in the next chapter’ lists and seriously, physical pain, this wheel has already been invented and it is rolling beautifully)

PLEASE LET ME BOOKMARK YOUR FIC I BEG YOU

“But I need an invite for AO3!”

Yes, and the waiting list is currently 2-3 days. That’s hardly worth not doing this for, right?

“But I only read fic, I don’t post it”

here is a post on why having an account just to read fic is also very worth it!

Lately I’ve been the tumblr person who jumps onto people who post cool fic to tumblr and going HEY HAVE YOU POSTED THIS TO AO3, YOU REALLY SHOULD, HIT ME UP FOR AN INVITE CODE and I hereby invite all you fellow fic readers and posters to join me into spreading the good word.