Without getting too spoilery for those who havenβt watched, one of the things that I love about Castle is that they didnβt shy away from giving Beckett a legit sex drive. That woman instigates sex constantly, and itβs so great to see.
There are acceptable sexual tropes for women in media:
Women are allowed to like and want sex, but not as much as their male partner.
Theyβre allowed to come on to a guy, but later, they need to complain about a headache to get out of it.
They can instigate, but itβs because he wanted it first. Etc. etc.
Daddy Beckett, though? She gonna get what she wants whenever she wants it. And I love that for her. ;)
News flash: women want sex, too. Men just donβt always know how to make them want it enough to get laid on a regular basis. And as much as Castle irritates me sometimes (and as clueless and narcissistic as he can be), heβs mostly really good at wooing Beckett. π€
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First him disappearing on their wedding day. Then her needing a time out from their marriage.
These writers were really excellent at character assassination.
I canβt imagine you all watching week to week. I would have been so pissed.
First offβ¦Beckett deserved that wedding day moment. She was so happy. And the *viewers* deserved it, too. I understand needing to create tension after your Slow Burn Couple finally gets together, but that was NOT the way.
Have him abducted after the marriage. Same outcome, different emotional toll. Or you know. Donβt be lazy with ridiculous reveals to create faux story progression.
Akwkencicusbbeufbcid.
Iβm glad theyβre back together in season 8, but I have so much sympathy for those of you who were watching as this aired.
Also, whoever thought Nathan Fillion could carry that show on his own was smoking something extra special. Beckett makes that show what it is. And heβs only compelling as it relates to him being the other half of Caskett. Not sure if thatβs a hottake or not, but if Kate isnβt there, Iβm bored as hell.
Iβm well over a decade late to the Castle party, but hear me outβ¦
I knew nothing about the show going into it. And Iβve been obsessed with the two of them since the beginning. Love. They give me all the feels, and I want them to be happy.
Iβm much more invested in Beckett than I am Castle, though, and I just finished the season 5 finale, and I have β¨Thoughtsβ¨.
Putting under a Read More in case there are others like me who havenβt seen it yet.
Did anyone else take issue with the proposal?
Some background on me: I left my husband in 2020. I was pretty well convinced that he didnβt even like me. I was shocked that *he* was shocked when divorce was brought up. The entire time, I knew it would be an amicable split when I got up the nerve to mention it, so color my world rocked when he was upset about it.
I had a ton of PTSD to work through once I got out of our house and into my own apartment. Things I didnβt even realize he had conditioned me to be frightened of. He was psychologically and emotionally abusive and had been for years.
Anyway. All of this to say that I have some trauma. lol Especially when it comes to narcissistic people, and letβs be real. Diagnosed or not, Castle is a bit of a narcissist. Swirl that around with his privilege, and he is wildly oblivious and clueless about so many things.
I wanted more for Beckett. I wanted the romantic gesture. The build up to a proposal. The planned out event, the forethought. Not that it needed to be a spectacle, but I wanted more for her than a lovebomb a few episodes back leading to an apology that was still all about him and then a panicked proposal.
I watched the first episode of season 6, so I know there was more to it than that, but I nearly cried when he pulled out that ring on the swings.
I know he loves her. And I know he wasnβt doing it to get her to stay. But it still felt like an afterthought. It felt like he was tying a rope around her waist so he could tug her back to him when he needed to.
He could have just supported her in that moment. He didnβt need a ring to say, βThis is such a great opportunity! Iβm so excited for you. I will make a plan to come see you in DC while youβre training, and then we can figure out the rest once youβre settled. This is amazing! Youβre going to rock it.β He didnβt need a ring to say, βI want to make this easy for you. Letβs go look at houses this weekend.β
He didnβt need a ring to say, βI love you, and Iβm here for this. No matter what.β
And a lot of this likely stems from sadness about missing out on my own milestone experiences.
My husband proposed to me on a bed with a hockey game on after the pregnancy test was positive.
Him: Well. Will you marry me?
Me: Mhm.
No ring. Later, he gave me his grandmotherβs ring on the beach with little to no ceremony, and I remember being thankful it wasnβt gold (it was white gold). Not excited about spending my life with him; thankful a gold ring wouldnβt clash with my skin tone.
Months and months later, after a miscarriage and a move to another state, he told me he wouldnβt have even asked me had I not gotten pregnant. Justβ¦said it like it was a normal thing to say in a conversation. Said he cared for me when I asked if he loved me and then told me maybe I shouldnβt come with him on the next move out of state.
We worked through it. But it was always rocky. We did better as friends than we ever did as lovers, and I donβt miss being married to him.
But watching Castle and Beckettβs relationship unfold - watching Castle treat her the same way I was treated - itβs bringing up a lot of things that I thought I had already healed from.
And I think some of it has been because Iβve been living vicariously through Beckett. Enjoying how badass she is. Enjoying watching how competent and skilled she is. Loving watching her kick ass and be tough but still rock a dress. Show up to work in stilettos, kick down doors, and still be vulnerable and sweet.
Only to then be treated like she was a prize won so he didnβt need to try anymore.
Meh.
Bleh.
Idk. I was told very recently that it was βJust a TV Showβ while trying to articulate how it was making me feel, so Iβm going to cry about it and then let it go.
Good night to the aether that is tumblr. lol Thanks for listening.
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Today was my birthday. I met my parents for lunch to make my mom happy (I just moved back east, and Iβm an only child, so holidays are herβs for awhile), I dropped dessert and a small gift off for the woman I love on my way home (we share a birthday, funnily enough), and then I went home and took care of my pup. I cleaned up a bit, changed, and then I drove myself 35 minutes across town to go ice skating by myself. Afterwards, I swung by Starbucks and enjoyed the warm drink in my hand for the ride home.
Iβve struggled with what this day was going to be since Sunday or Monday. I donβt have friends. Thereβs no one calling me wanting to take me out or celebrate. No oneβs texting me about coming over or visiting or meeting for dinner. And while Iβm glad I decided to get divorced, holidays and my birthday are always difficult now that Iβm on my own. I never did anything major. But there was still someone there asking what I wanted to do. What kind of cake I wanted. Did I want cake?
And I feel sort of selfish even feeling so bad about being alone today. Like I need to be surrounded by people who are celebrating me. lol
I guess I just feel likeβ¦.I do so much with other people in mind. I put other people before myself constantly. Sometimes to my own detriment. Itβs my default setting at this point. And while thatβs my fault more than it is theirβs, of course, I just kind of look forward to my birthday because it gives me an excuse to be selfish. I can accept compliments and praise without feeling overly weird about it.
But I shared today. I fit Me in where I could, but it was rarely about me even when it was. I feel stupid even writing that sentence.
Idk. Iβm tired of feeling so alone. I know the holidays are a time where that is exacerbated, and I know after the new year rolls around and my schedule gets back to normal, Iβll feel mostly fine again. But right now I feel it, and itβs heavy.
Iβm mostly happy. There are details that make me exceedingly unhappy, but when I can ignore some of those things - tilt my head, squint - Iβm mostly happy.
Nothing like sitting beside the woman you love while sheβs wearing her girlfriendβs tshirt. Great, wonderful, excellent feeling. Two thumbs up. 10/10, would never recommend.
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βI like your face, itβs really nice, and I want to smoosh my face all over your face.β
to
βIβd like to help you do laundry and wash your dishes and clean your house here put your feet up you deserve to sit there like the queen you are, I got this.β
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