Healer in Chief

Anything short of freedom is an imposter... For when you truly love, you desire for your loved ones to live freely in authenticity, joy, and health.

Demanding or expecting someone else to live by your standards and to change in ways to fulfill your desire isn’t love, but selfishness.

Even desiring yourself to live by someone else’s standards and attempting to change yourself to fulfill others isn’t the way to love.

That’s about trying to control something that is not designed for control, the opposite of giving freedom. It leads to delusion, pain, and disease… ultimately stunting the evolution of consciousness and leaving you feeling the opposite of love, fear and all its offspring.

If you truly want to love and be loved, give and receive freedom to all. If you react to this idea in an uncomfortable way, that’s a sign you’ve got some rewarding reflection and contemplation to do.

What I have found helpful is to be honest about not owning anything or anyone, not being owned by anything or anyone, and not owing anyone or being owed anything.

Affirmations aren’t going to cut it. They actually push you further away from your desired state… because you wouldn’t be thinking about what you’re thinking about now, if it’s from a place of lack and want.

For example, a healthy person doesn’t go around saying, “I am healthy”. This is inherent operating knowledge. A truly rich person doesn’t worry about how the bills are going to get paid. He or she knows that money must go out in order to come in, and that they always cover what needs to be covered. There may be a focus on making more money, or being responsible with and respectful of money, but not from a place of lack, but from a satisfactory place of abundance.

Joy, health, peace, and fulfillment all come from self-love. Yet, how many have truly mastered this in all aspects of their lives?

Who always chooses what the put into their body and mind from a place of Love?

Who always chooses what they do with their body and mind from a place of Love?

I believe that even if you’re not at 100%, if you make this your practice at least 51% of the time… your life will improve significantly. Over time you will get closer to 100% consistency too.

Poking holes in others’ character doesn’t help anyone. Celebrating when another human falls doesn’t help either. Wishing for your “brother” or “sister” to suffer attracts suffering to you, especially mentally… and physically if left unchecked.

Imagining others as their ideal brings you closer to your highest self and allows opportunity for them to do the same. Making an effort to find ways that you are similar to others and focusing on developing your own character helps everyone, especially for you to have peace and experience more fulfillment in life.

The key to being a “team player” is to lead by example and to consciously choose how you feel, insulating yourself from reacting to anything external so that you always remain in control of the only thing you can ever control… your state of being and expression.

Living consciously and intentionally in two worlds is no easy feat.

The finite world that all are born into is one of illusion and division. This world is filled with distractions that tend to confuse and impede the unenlightened.

The Infinite world that all are always a part of is is one of Truth and Unity. This world is filled with directions that tend to clear and progress enlightenment.

I caught this very quickly and began to question why I was truly feeling the way I was and if my expectations were appropriate.

It turns out I was projecting how I felt about an unmet inner need onto someone else. I wanted someone else to do for me that which I haven’t been wiling to do for myself that only I could do.

I was subconsciously arguing with reality by not dealing with the consequences of some of my actions, inactions, and unquestioned beliefs of years or even decades past.

It was enlightening to realize I could have handled the circumstances from a more grounded place had I reflected beforehand instead of afterwards.

It was also enlightening to see where I have been neglecting myself that needs my attention so that I stop subconsciously bringing that energy into exchanges with others.

My expectations may have been appropriate and even my behavior could have been considered appropriate given the circumstances... as I always do my best to be respectful, no matter how I feel.

What’s changed for me is the awareness that I have about being able to handle emotionally charged circumstances in a more desirable way. Next time, space allowing, I will reflect beforehand to understand why I may be moved by something outside of me as I know it always has to do with something inside of me that needs my attention.

I feel so blessed to know many talented people that enjoy creating beautiful images with me. All it takes is a good eye and good idea to turn it into a beautiful reality.

This photo was so simple to create. A visiting artist friend put a backdrop up in his hotel room and I styled myself. This is a raw unedited image.

It’s taken me most of my life to recognize and appreciate my own beauty, inner and outer. I’m grateful that I finally have learned to see, accept, and love reality exactly as it is… arguing with reality was insane and painful.

photo credit: John Schuyler

I was just reminded of this and am grateful that I keep striving for what matters most to me, especially my heart.

I may pause and focus on other more attainable goals, but I always remember the big picture and come back to the ones that take more time, resources, and creativity when I have the space to do so.

May you also find balance in achieving all that you aspire to experience in this lifetime.

When I say dream world, I mean more of a nightmare, not a desirable daydream.

Most people seem to accept their thoughts and beliefs as if they are objective truth… without ever questioning them.

Many people use their imagination to dream up a future based on imperfect recollections of the past of incorrectly perceived experiences. This way, some end up suffering, in the here and now, over something that may never come to pass. This is because our minds can’t distinguish on their own between reality and fantasy… and our bodies respond to our minds’ commands accordingly.

Some people have “megaphones” and spread their unquestioned thoughts and beliefs around to other people who accept them as objective truth without question.

This is how hypnotism works. No critical thinking is ever required, and you can easily and inadvertently hypnotize yourself in undesirable ways. No formal training is required to make yourself or others suffer… only ignorance.

For more than two decades, understanding human behavior, psychology, and suffering has been my primary area of study. I wanted to find a way to help myself and others not experience it anymore.

Along the way, I learned suffering plays a vital role in the evolution of consciousness and that it is not my duty to interfere in anyone's path of progression. All that is my duty is to lead by example, be open, and be helpful.

When a person has suffered enough, they will earnestly look for relief… and be open to changing their beliefs, thoughts, and acts.

In the past 3 months of this year, it seems much of my inner work has been focused on questioning everything that brings me any sort of dis-ease. To me that is a sign of unfinished work.

Decades of suffering led me here, and I’m pleased to report that there is most definitely relief, peace, and freedom here… as long as I remember to keep questioning my undesirable experiences.

It’s not what we’re taught to do, yet it is the way forward.

Most of what people believe is true is their ego/imagination at work.

Most of what people have believed was worth fighting for and dying for has been based on fantasy or theory, not fact.

Sometimes I get teary eyed when I experience or witness people giving freely from their hearts without expectations.

To give because you want to... and not out of guilt, force, or an agenda is part of why we’re here.

To receive open heartedly and fully is another part of why we’re here.

I appreciate engaging with strangers from very different backgrounds that I randomly meet on the street, respectfully talking about politics in small groups (even when we don’t agree on everything), and realizing there are still many reasonable, kind, and open minded people in the world … especially in the least likely places (at least according to media).

I even get hugs out of these sorts of exchanges.

So live as fully as you can and be your most authentic self, not who your environment has taught you to be.

Listen to your intuition.

Set yourself free.

More and more, I find myself ignoring people I am in disagreement / dissonance with... especially if they want to be right. I let them pass by my consciousness, while I continue enjoying my self. (I even do this when I’m driving and I know I have the right of way.)

With some people that are quite persistent and seem to be addicted to friction… I limit my interactions with them as much as possible if I can’t avoid them completely.