fuck it bnuuy time

they should invent making friendship bracelets for online friends

Yesterday I got my flu vax AND covid booster AND tetanus vax AND a routine blood draw. and well I feel not so good. Four needles that's too many needles but I'm a healthy responsible boy now and I can play with rusty nails and broken glass and get sneezed on as much as I want and will never die

WHAT-

kids these days are just too busy being gay to go on my perilous wizard quests

always on that damn phone instead of my perilous wizard quests

The "Type 5318008 and turn it upside down" exploit found on all calculators has been patched, no longer works

LISTEN TO ME. THIS IS COMPLETELY TRUE. THEY WORK EXACTLY THE SAME. GET THOSE INSTEAD.

if a professor has a single digit (or ZERO) number of allowable absences that means they really really want to hear a grotesquely detailed description of every medical problem you have btw. your goal should be as much disgust on the face as possible

This one is pissing me off because there’s cheese in it. I’m not sure there’s a period of Chinese dynastic history wherein the type of dudes likely to be having rap battles would also have been familiar with hard cheese. There’d be political fucking implications to that. Fermented dairy products were often seen as uncivilized foods, and were associated in particular with northern “barbarian” cuisine (see: <lactose intolerance in Eurasia>), whereas competitive poetry was viewed as a civilized and scholarly pastime appropriate to civil servants and courtiers. Mentioning cheese in a verse which also references the heavens could be seen as an effort to legitimize the presence of these dangerous foreign elements within Chinese society, and, thus, as seditious. If dairy were to become a common theme in rap battles, it might be viewed as a dangerous sign of poor morale and defeatist thinking among the literati. “Emperor, we have got to move the capital to the south. The scholars are rapping about cheese. It’s all falling apart.”

Now this is a fucking post