HYSTERIA !

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Okay, so first things first.

I was writing for YEARS already. I started writing when I was 10, and my first book had approximately 200 pages. I'm not saying I'm perfect in my field tho.

The fanfiction I write is mostly for fun, so don't take it as my peak of writing, but soon I'll post my real book when I translate the draft into English [Department of Truth (and other lies) that I was working on for past 4 years]

TADC is a thing I have a love-hate relationship with. And people may behave like TikTok Fandom while reading this "Okay, main protagonist nobody asked" (real comment I got), but as a human being, I believe I have the right to SPEAK UP. Now...

The Pacing

This is the major issue with The Amazing Digital Circus.

The pacing and the whole plot of episodes look wrong, to the point where characters get lobotomised instead of getting an ARC.

Gooseworx (IN MY OPINION) either didn't care or couldn't write it better, taking the short time she came up with TADC. Which is not an excuse, but an explanation for the writing.

EP 1 promised something else entirely than what we got.

Aside from a few minor arcs that could be explained with a flashback later or just a mention, we have something I call "wasting attention".

Ep 2 and 3 didn't bring much, aside from Gumigoo and that Kinger can think in the dark.

Which weren't worth the filler that walked hand in hand with it.

Ep 4 is better. We have action, we have the beginning of an arc...

And then ep 5 hits us with sudden lore dumps and Jax starting to behave like the chewed and spew out archetype of "oh, but he's traumatized!! Poor lil baby!"

Dude, KINGER LOST A WIFE.

I AM ENTP 7w8 TOO, AND I DON'T BEHAVE LIKE THAT, maybe because I take my meds. But for all the years I hadn't been medicated, I wasn't an ultimate bully, even while sabotaging my relationships as well. It's maybe just me, idk.

NOW NOW NOW

Before Jax's fans jump me.

I'm not sayin' don't kin him because I said so. I don't fucking care.

It's just that dude is such a favorite of the author that she's not even sleek about it.

We have a constantly excused man-child who used both physical and psychological violence.

And then the lobotomized cast who just sees him drop one tear and then takes him in.

Sure, they're all screwed, but it doesn't erase what he did. and never apologized for.

Back to the pacing.

Then ep 6...

Oh boi.

Suddenly, Pomni and Jax are friends.

That may hurt my readers, but I always add funnybunny because it fits my fanfiction, not because I'm mega fun of it. Pomni SHOULD RUN AWAY FROM THIS MAN.

Literally, out of nowhere.

"Because something happened behind the scenes."

Oh, how I love it when people use that to explain bad writing.

Sure, the two had a heart-to-heart in ep 5, but it doesn't excuse why Pomni suddenly became so attached to his hip.

Here comes the theory that she may have been used to being badly treated by people around her - the jester avatar, and the Gumigoo trauma she received.

But it's all speculation. Without it, it looks like they developed a bond from one episode to the next...

And for what?

To have a big divorce at the end of the ep, so later Jax can aura farm and Pomni will chase after him.

BTW JAX WAS SO 13 YEAR OLD CREEPYPASTA FAN CODED.

That dude will have a change of heart, probably, while holding her dead, cold body.

That's the cliche stuff I can think of, looking at this whole cliche arc.

EP 7 IS THE WORST.

It's like somebody said, "yeah, let's make everyone stupid and speed run their hate for Caine, but also add a sequence where Jaxxy boy nearly abstracts".

Jax's abstraction sequence is a massive filler. Way to fill minutes.

I get they are desoritented and desperate, but... did nobody think (aside from Jaxxy boy ofc because he's so smart) "hey, something stinks, and it's not Jax's unbrushed teeth"?

LIKE THE FACT IT WENT ALL SO SMOOTHLY IS A MAJOR RED FLAG. I KNEW FROM THE DAMN BEGINNING.

EP 8 was, tbh, pretty plain as well. Predictible. They could've merged episodes 7 and 8, and it'd be better, in my opinion, at least.

Sure, we got SOME info from episodes. But it's still as butchered as MD that Glitch (allegedly) cut short. Lore is as messed up as MD's.

And no, an hour of Jax-aura-farming and lore dump won't help. AT ALL.

People who read my finale, which was written for fun, know Jax is gonna probably blame everybody, go aura farming, and others will fight tooth and nail to get control of the situation, until he comes back for the finished product and gets taken in.

They may be the minds of dead people. Kinger may be related to Pomni. Those are my theories.

ALSO, both Jax and Zooble are in the right; "we are cartoon characters + we were, are, and will be humans".

The same goes with Caine vs Cast. Both are right. That's all.

Those conflicts were written well. Really.

In my opinion, how to fix this mess?

Okay, so

Throw us all into the action. Saves time by cutting out the fillers that brought little to nothing into the lore and saves characters from feeling lobotomized. Right now we have 5 ep "before the storm"...

Avoid the most cliche character tropes. Diversity is the key, but some of those are the most used tropes I've ever seen. Use situations from your life, but alter them, mix them, not plain slice of life stuff in a world like this.

Spend more time on dialogues.

Those characters have their own voices, and it's perfect.

BUT

They sound, sometimes, very artificial.

Swap episodes and see if they can work without each other.

If not? Good.

If yes, and I'm talking about a big yes. Bad.

That's how I check my chapters. Ask somebody who hadn't seen it to do it and ask FOR THEIR OPINION. Better if you find two people to check it with different parts.

Okay, that's all for now.

Overall.

6,5/10.