adriana

Who else moans when they eat the subway cookie

i love the concept of divorce lawyers. the only things in the world that have the power to undo your marriage are death itself or a special little boy with a law degree.

til death or some guy do us part

man if I saw an elf nobody would be able to stop me

From what

nobody would be able to stop me

If you’re a little weird that’s kinda sexy of you

as above (insane in the head) so below (insane in the pussy)

blood test came back haunted

you know the fandomscape has changed b/c now whenever a piece of media gets popular I no longer see Malk, Circletine, Gay or European, or Left Brain Right Brain animatics anymore

I’ve been getting this weird almost tensing feeling in my back recently on and off and I don’t know from what. Hold on actually let me check something

i hate dogs with blue eyes. why is fucking jeff the killer at my back door

before this starts getting notes i have to add that this is not my dog. i dont know how he got in my backyard

the r/curatedtumblr -> tumblr migration is so funny to me. it's like going to the zoo and enjoying it so much you climb into the enclosure to live with the monkeys