stuck in second gear !

No explicit NSFW, but some could be interpreted that way. Alter as necessary!

SOFT

“Your hands are so warm.”

“Ah, that feels good…”

“Wait… are you braiding my hair?”

“Is it okay if I lean on you?”

“Just hold me for awhile. Please.”

“You don’t mind me touching you there, right?”

“Oh! I didn’t mean to fall asleep leaning on you.”

“Don’t stop stroking my hair…”

“Be gentle with me.”

“Y’know, I could go for a back rub right now. Just saying.”

“Please… Kiss me, even if it’s just this once.”

“I bet I’m strong enough to pick you up.”

“Can I use your lap as a pillow?”

“Touch me. I don’t care how. I just need to feel something right now…”

“I could kiss you all over.”

“That tickles!”

“Mind washing my back for me?”

“I didn’t know you were the cuddling type.”

“I love how soft your lips are.”

“Don’t get up just yet, I’ll miss having you next to me.”

“No one’s kissed me like that in a long time.”

ROUGH

“Ow! That fucking hurt!”

“Keep talking, and I’ll seriously slap the shit out of you.”

“You stepped on my foot!”

“Did you do that on purpose?”

“Please be more gentle next time…”

“Don’t squeeze so tight!”

“Hey, don’t touch me there. It hurts.”

“Did you just bite me?!”

“Next time I’ll hit you like I mean it.”

“Is that the best you’ve got?”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“I’ll make you bleed.”

“You really can’t take a hit, can you?”

“Hey!! What was that for?!”

“Shit, are you crying? I didn’t mean to do it that hard.”

“That stung a little. Go easy on me next time.”

“Don’t tell me you can’t handle a little sparring.”

“You almost knocked me over!”

“I won’t stop until I hear you scream.”

“That’s gonna leave a bruise…”

ANGSTY TEXTS, BITCH

[text] You should have told me you wanted me out of your life. [text] I should have never let you back into my life. [text] Okay [muse’s name] what’s the deal, pretty sure this is you…listen if you want me to leave you alone, please just tell that. [text] Please don’t walk away. [text] Please don’t do this. [text] When are you going to realize I want nothing to do with you? [text] You want nothing to do with me, I get it. [text] I’m an idiot. You fooled me again. [text] When I think things are about to change … I’m always proven wrong. [text] I just want you to be happy. And you’ll be happier without me. [text] I just hate that someone could make me trust [him/her/them] the way that I did [text] The truth is I’m not over you. [text] The truth is I never really wanted to be with you. [text] I’m seeing someone else. [text] How the hell did you get my number, stalker? [text] You’re so selfish. [text] I just saw you leave with [her/him/them]. [text] FUCK YOU AND YOUR DUMB CUTE FACE

LOVING TEXTS, BITCH

[text] Did I tell you today that you’re the most adorable? Cause, yeah. [text] Be careful. [text] I’m only saying it because I love you. [text] I’m only saying it because I care about you. [text] Okay, I’m bringing coffee. [text] I’m thinking dinner and a movie later this week? [text] Let me take you out, please? [text] Let me make you dinner tonight. [text] I want you to be happy. [text] You’re always safe with me. [text] I can’t stop thinking about you. [text] I seriously don’t know what I’d do without you. [text] I know you may not feel like you are, but you are loved. And important. Please don’t forget that. [text] It was so good seeing you. [text] You don’t need this shit. [text] I’ll be there in five minutes. [text] Let me help, please? [text] You’re important to me. [text] Stop falling asleep in the bathtub. You’re going to drown and die and leave me and I’m not having that. [text] I would gladly watch Netflix and eat Thai with you any day. [text] I’d give up my phone charger AND the last piece of gum for you. That’s love. [text] Hey beautiful no judgment but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??

ANGRY TEXTS, BITCH

[text] If you don’t want me to bust your window, I suggest you answer the phone. Now. [text] To quote Mean Girls, you’re a fugly slut. [text] Are you SERIOUSLY bringing that up right now!? [text] Lose my number, asshole. [text] You’re so predictable and obnoxious. And it’s not only me who thinks so. [text] …The least you could do is answer, wtf. [text] You’re a piece of shit human being and an even worse friend. [text] This is YOUR FAULT. And you can’t even pretend like it isn’t, because you know it is. [text] Why couldn’t you just stay out of it? [text] Holy fucking shit, take a hint, asshole. [text] Go fuck yourself. [text] What the fucking hell is wrong with you? [text] You can take your stuff back as long as I don’t light it on fire first. [text] I have cramps and a migraine so you do NOT want to mess with me right now [text] Bye and have a very fuck you day

SEXY TEXTS, BITCH

[text] Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this. [text] Why are you so hot…like honestly, it’s not fair. [text] Yeah, you looked good in your [dress/shirt/pants] last night but really, they looked way better on my floor. [text] Come over. With condoms. [text] You should come over, clothing optional. [text] I feel like a nasty slut and I LOVE IT [text] Sorry I got drunk and texted you about my sex life [text] Sex on a rooftop - trashy or adventurous? [text] If you’re not at my apartment, shirtless, in five minutes, I will be personally offended. [text] I don’t think he likes that I’m always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together [text] It’ll be like The Notebook, except with way more of my penis. [text] I didn’t know that all of his brothers would be hot and musically inclined, too. That’s a dick move on behalf of biology. [text] I DON’T WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH. [text] So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking? [text] I just need some of your time and all of your body. [text] I am available for nakedness [text] I think about [him/her/them] when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love

DRUNK TEXTS, BITCH

feel free to change words and pronouns as needed.

“(Name), I don’t have time for you right now.”

“And I don’t like being stalked! Not by psycho-nerds, or their cats!”

“Ready to break a leg, (name)?

“What a piece of work is man! How noble in reason!”

“You’re not listening to me!”

“You probably think this world is a dream come true… but you’re wrong.”

“Why steal this?”

“Why does she want me?”

“She wants something to love, I think. Something that isn’t her.”

“You realize you’re going right into her trap?”

“You’re not my mother!”

“They say even the proudest spirit can be broken with love.”

“Maybe they got bored of you and moved to France.”

“Don’t worry. I’m getting the hang of it.”

“You’ll just go home and be bored and neglected, same as always.”

“Stay here with us. We will listen to you and laugh with you. If you stay here, you can have whatever you want.”

“How can you walk away from something and still come back to it?”

“Evil witch!!! I’m not scared!”

“You don’t get it, do you?”

“I think you might have said something like that.”

“You know I love you.”

“Well you have a very funny way of showing it.”

“Now you’re going to stay here forever.”

‘i’ll make you something, yeah? your favorite dish, just for you.’

‘let’s get you back to bed.’

‘shh, it was just a nightmare.’

‘you like this, don’t you? i remember you saying that.’

‘i drew up a bath for you.’

‘you need rest.’

‘you ought to be asleep.’

‘i bought two.’

‘here. you can have the rest.’

‘i thought of you when i saw this.’

‘i like your smile.’

‘you have a cute laugh.’

‘stay there. i’m coming there to get you.’

‘it’s okay, i’m here, we’re okay.’

‘be careful.’

‘look both ways.’

‘you mean so much to me.’

‘i can’t lose you.’

‘i thought i might have lost you.’

‘how to you feel about the nickname, (insert nickname)?’

‘it looks good on you.’

‘i’ll make you soup.’

‘ah-ah-ah. you’re sick. you need to stay in bed.’

‘are you okay in there?’

‘that’s it, that’s it. get it all out. shh.’

‘it’s a remedy i knew. helps with your throat.’

‘it’s a lullaby. would you like me to sing it to you? would that help you fall asleep?’

‘i’m worried about you.’

‘what do you want to watch?’

‘where would you like to go for dinner?’

‘close your eyes and hold out your hands.’

‘we’ll figure it out.’

‘oh, it’s not big deal. you’re fine.’

‘i brought you some medicine for your cold.’

‘you’re important to me.’

‘this is your favorite song, right?’

‘you’re like a son/daughter to me.’

‘good luck!’

‘you’re like a mom/dad to me.’

‘don’t say that about yourself.’

‘want to come with?’

“wow! you look really nice.’

‘goodnight, (insert term of affection).’

‘it’s okay. i couldn’t sleep anyway.’

‘you can have half.’

‘come here. let me fix it.’

‘your tie is crooked.’

‘c’mere. shh, it’s okay.’

‘i’m not going to hurt you.’

‘can i touch you?’

‘can i kiss you?’

‘can i hug you?’

‘promise.’

‘would i ever lie to you?’

‘i think you’re very beautiful/handsome.’

‘hey, good-looking.’

‘of course i care. you’re my family.’

‘one more chapter.’

me: i wanna write

someone: then… write?

me: