木漏れ日

i have two moods and they are gay and nervous

how the fuck is it december this week 

Just a reminder:the natural diet of these birds is BONES. Not just bone marrow; actual bone shards. They pick up huge freaking bones from carcasses and drop them onto rocks until they get spiky pieces and then they swallow them. Their stomach acid dissolves bone.

look me in the eye and tell me that’s not a fucking dragon

Me and my future wife

OMG yes 100%

ok so the other day i was at sears. I was in the baby section. Im standing there looking at clothes and a lady who works there comes up and is like “oh are you expecting?” And i was like “uhhhh” and because im a dumbass i was like “no i already delivered.” And she was like “How long ago?” And i was just like “two weeks.” And she said “wow! You look great! When i had my first son, i looked like a mess for six months. Is it a boy or a girl?” And i was just awkwardly like “a girl….” And she asked her name and i said Chernobyl and she was like “oh what a cute name! It sounds really familiar.” And i honestly just stood there going through all that and pretending i had a human baby two weeks ago named Chernobyl because i didnt wanna tell this poor lady i was buying baby clothes for my fucking baby opossum

every time i see this text post i forget the ending and every single time it decimates me

This is why I LOVE same-sex relationships. Like, who’s gonna propose?? Probably both!!

This made my whole damn day

if you wanna know how long this year has been: the whole fucking tide pod fuckery happened in january

i luv bein disgusting and an angel at the same time