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When Things Are Left Unsaid

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You sit in the common room with you friends, enjoying a relaxing day off. You all decided that every once in awhile you would invite your friends/family over and have a BBQ together. Unfortunately it rained today, so it was moved inside, but it still worked. You are currently sitting on the couch between Steve and Nat, and occasional look over into the kitchen where you see Bucky and his girlfriend, Jessica.

Every time you see Bucky smile softly or whisper in her ear, or kiss her, your heart breaks more and more. Bucky and you are best friends. He confided in you a lot when he first arrived, and said you made him comfortable because you would never judge him. As time went on, you started to grow feelings for the blue eyed super soldier, but out of fear of rejection, kept your damn mouth shut.

When Bucky introduced you to Jessica, who was your complete opposite in every way, though nice enough, you were glad you kept your mouth shut. Bucky obviously didn’t want a girl like you. He wanted someone like her. When Jessica came into the picture, your moments with Bucky became far and few between. Now you pretty much only see him at these BBQs or on a mission. It’s not like he has pushed you away on purpose, just that he spends all his time with Jessica. 

You hate Jessica.

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Bucky stands in the kitchen making sure he can look into the common room while he continues to have a conversation about Jessica’s friends boyfriend or something like that, who might be proposing, or is proposing, or will never propose. Honestly, Bucky doesn’t even care. He looks out into the common room and sees you sitting on the couch with the smile, that makes him melt, on your face.

He longs to have that smile directed at him, but he hasn’t had that happen in awhile. He knows he hasn’t been spending as much time with you, and it kills him. You see, he is madly in love with you. You are the one that he wants to spend all of his time with, but because he was scared of being rejected, he never said anything. 

He thought the only way to get over his undying love for you, would be to find someone else. Enter Jessica. She was sweet, beautiful, kind, and boring. He thought it was a perfect match. He needed someone to counteract the craziness that was his life. And while he enjoys his time with Jessica, he still yearns for you. Plus did I mention she was boring?

Bucky sees you get up from the couch and head down the hall. Without a second thought he excuses himself from Jessica, with a quick kiss on the cheek, and runs after you. He reaches you when you make it to the elevator.

“Where you headin’ Doll?” he asks with a smirk.

You gasp and grab your chest, “Jesus, warn someone next time. You almost gave me a fucking heart attack asshole!” you say, smacking him on his right arm.

Bucky laughs, “Sorry. Where you going?” he asks again.

“Oh, uh... I have a... a date to get ready for,” you say.

You don’t know why you are nervous, when Bucky has a girlfriend and doesn’t share your feelings. Meanwhile Bucky’s heart breaks a little. You were going to go out with someone else. What if you like him and start dating? What if you bring him around and he has to watch you both be together? What if you fall in love and get married?

You look at Bucky confused by his reaction. His smile disappeared and he looks... panicked.

“You alright Buck?” you ask.

Bucky nods, still not knowing what to say. 

“Where... Why... Who is he?” Bucky asks.

You can’t help but scoff, getting annoyed by his reaction. Almost like he can’t believe you would get a date.

“Nat set us up. He’s nice. We’ve gone out a few times,” you say.

“I didn’t know this! This is usually something you tell your best friend,” Bucky snaps.

“Yea well I barely see my best friend anymore since he started dating someone else. What the hell is wrong with you?” you ask fully annoyed now.

“I just... I don’t want to lose you. As my friend. To some guy who will take up all your time,” Bucky says.

Your eyebrows shoot up, “I’m sorry, what time do you have for me anymore, James? We haven’t hung out in months. You are always with your girlfriend. I had to move on from you, and that is what I’m doing!” you yell, not catching your slip up.

“Move on from me?” Bucky asks surprised.

Your eyes widen in fear. You decide to forget the elevator and run toward the staircase and away from Bucky. Bucky watches after, wanting to follow, but stuck in this spot, stunned.

Move on from me? Does that mean you had feelings for me?

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Definitely a 2 parter! Part 2 coming eventually. I probably could have made 1 long post... but I have a thing for cliffhangers. 👹