HOT DEMON B!TCHES NEAR U ! ! !

finding out that loitering is a real crime is mind blowing. I don't want to hear anyone from the US say anything about North Korea ever again

if you're having trouble sleeping the best you can do is put a bright object close to your face and look at it for at least 30 minutes. if that doesn't work you can close your eyes but make sure to think really hard about a bunch of bullshit

no alcohol in this flask girl this is miso soup

(to the tune of mary had a little lamb): mary had a little lamb

hate that I was understanding when I should’ve just been a cunt

Kyllä routa mummon lumeen ajaa

Katosi kuin leppäkeihäs

Lensi kuin pieru Saharassa

Kissan hännän ostajalla on paskanen loppu

Ei kannettu vesi sammaloidu

Ei kannettu kirves kaivossa pysy

Seisoo siinä kuin nallit kalliolla

Niin kuin perseeseen ammuttu kyrpä otsassa

Ei vierivä lapsi mene pesuveden mukana

Ei niinkään yhdistelmä ku muunnelma mutta yks minun lemppareita on "löydään viisaat päät poikki"

Niin metsä vastaa kuin sinne itse kapsahtaa

the crazy thing about this place called “grocery store” is that you always need to go there. especially if you like, just went.

ma'am, I'm going to place you on a brief hold while I look for a reaction image

"i ate too many cookies" is truly an ageless problem. an unlearnable lesson.

goodbye $200 helloooo 3 groceries

it is impossible to watch a movie. every night i think i want to watch a movie. no movie gets watched. because it's not possible

and yet they keep making movies with the hopes that one day humanity will discover a way to watch them. it's so inspiring

number one rule! never believe ur thoughts after 10 pm . unless its about The Character then believe all of your thoughts wholeheartedly

Can I be honest with yall I don't want to hear SHIT against cishets at pride this year

"But it's not FOR them!!!" The biggest military power in the world belongs to a christofascist nation overseen by a felon found guilty of 34 federal crimes and has greenlit a gestapo with more direct funding than the entire military of Canada for the purpose of ethnic cleansing. Let Hetero Jessica throw some biodegradable glitter at a municipal parade

At this point if anyone is trying to exclude anyone benignly pro-queer from a pro-queer space I'm just going to assume you're a fed or something idk like something something destabilize the movement from within or whatever