Bonjour

saw someone refer to not knowing how to keep track of your money as "girl math" ......why are we in this weird era of treating women like idiots but repackaging it to sound cute and quirky. We All Need To Stop

puddle water is basically cigarettes for dogs

Yeah you're right. It WOULD be pretty fucked up if you were a swan but you were raised by ducks and you grew up never seeing another swan or even knowing that such a thing as a swan even existed so you just thought you were a duck with something super wrong with it.

hey you guys my friend just told me i have a stain on my shirt (embarrassing) and hes put his finger on the shirt to indicate where it is. Im gonna look down so i can asses the stain situation

we justifiably give Biden a lot of shit but I think "at least 3" is the funniest possible response to some right wing dipshit asking you how many genders there are

just took a DNA test but it turned out I didn’t have any and the doctor got really mad at me

Oh boy am I pissed off about having to participate in capitalist America

Ive got an idea

Mr Arson bestie, I'm excited to hear it