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she/they, 30s, mdni
quick link to my work on here
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#extradirty

occasionally subtle
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@gigglesnortpro
hi hi hi
she/they, 30s, mdni
quick link to my work on here
obligatory other links:
main tumblr 🐩
AO3 🍭
letterboxd 📺

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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How Shane vs Ilya talk about the other (they are in love)
follow up to shane hiding a wound post is that ilya would love to be in an eleventh hour dire situation in a location rigged to blow with tnt and then have the remote detonator stop working at the last second and then stay behind to detonate manually without telling anyone and everyone’s crying on the walkie talkies and he makes a witty yet poignant dick joke and then blows up
it gets to a point that is just weirder if they didn't fuck
you did all this and it was not even because you wanted to bang him? weirdo
a key component of situationship era hollanov is they both think the other one is out of their league.
Tags by @yearning-rivalry because yes, that is the tunameltgate.

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The black string in the back kinda makes it look like Amanda has Adam on a leash
This post is so funny like comment subscribe if you picture your favs bloodied and coughing on the floor and flinching
Headcanon of the day:
Ilya and marly has had several threesomes and marly has asked about having one with Jane
Ilya said no. Then later Shane asks if ilya has had a threesome cuz he’s curious as to how that would even work.
Ilya happily tells him and then against all odds Shane asks if marly would ever be interested in a threesome with the two of them.
Once they are out Ilya makes a joke to marly about marly being happy that Ilya said no to the threesome but Marly just shrugs and says he’s still down if they are.
It ends with the three of them in bed Marlys dick in Shane’s mouth and Ilyas dick in his ass. Round two ends the other way around.
ilya entering that hospital room sick to his stomach teeth ground to dust spirit crushed under the weight of their circumstances prepared to have an extremely difficult conversation and shane immediately hitting him with this
Ilya holding him still in this position and relentlessly pounding into him while shane just moans and trembles and takes it because he can’t do anything else

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#he wants to bite shane SO BAD
i love summer
When Shane and Ilya play monopoly Shane cheats and hustles Ilya. He does this by trading sexual favors for rent when he lands on one of Ilya’s properties instead of money. The hustle here is he starts doing this much earlier then he needs to, when he still has plenty of money to afford to pay Ilya with. Ilya suspects that Shane has the money but thinks that he’s only elected to go the blowjob route instead because Shane is Ilya’s little slut and has an oral fixation. So he assumes Shane’s motivations are sexual but actually Shane’s motivations are being a savvy businessman. Shane also has convinced Ilya that for this afternoon it would be really hot if he just services Ilya and Ilya makes him wait for any relief for himself so Ilya can’t trade sex the same way. So obviously Ilya ends up broke first but that’s fine he can bounce back from this. He is ready to sell himself to Mr. Landlord. Except he is worked up at this point so he doesn’t make Shame beg for it and afterwards Shane claims he never agreed that the sex would be in lieu of payment so Ilya is still liable for the full monetary amount. This is when Ilya calls Shane a dirty cheat and Shane argues it’s not his fault he knows how to correctly manage all of his assets.
And Ilya would never fall for this again but it doesn’t matter cus monopoly is now banned in the hollanov household.
Monopoly would be banned but the landlord / sex-for-rent roleplay would recurr forever.
"Ilya. We live together now. You know you don't have to-"
"So, you do not want orgasm for every week I do not pay to stay here. That is what you're saying?"
"..."
"Good. I will find other way to spend my evening, I guess. Instead of on my knees for sexy, strict landlord."
"Not if you don't want to get evicted, you won't."
"Yes, sir."
They'd likely switch roles repeatedly and it would probably get... weird.
"Yes, there is lock on door, Hollander. This is my room. You want to sleep here, you know my rates. You can start earning your stay here in the hall and we'll continue inside. Get started."
It would probably move outside of the house eventually.
"Oh, you thought I would just chauffeur you all the way for free, huh? No. I will restart car when you pay your fare. No, I will not take debit or credit. No, no Canadian currency either."
The chain of sex-related dominoes Shane tilted over when he cheated at Monopoly may never cease, and they are both very happy about it.
i know in my heart that with how much shane LOVES playing "noooo ilya. 🥰 i said nooooooooooo. 🥰" because he likes the game of being pushed into a yes he doesn't actually have to say, ilya 100% takes him at his word when he wants to rile him up into being annoyed.
ilya initiates the flirting and shane immediately hits the "ilya nooooo 🥰 we have people coming over 🥰 they'll be here in thirty minutes 🥰 noooooo 🥰," and ilya immediately pulls back and goes, "okay."
and shane is just 🤨 excuse me 🤨 what are you doing? 🤨
and ilya just you said no, dorogoy. and you are right. there is no time. people are coming over so soon.
and shane just >:( wait no >:( that's not the game >:(
another thing we need to discuss is shane hollander's vaginismus. of the soul but also of the pussy.

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“They said they wanted a vampire relationship with no age gap”
“No age gap??!?!?”
“And no non-con elements”
“NO NON CON?”
“And no coercion or otherwise manipulative behaviors”
“Joe they want a vampire with NOTHING”
starting a collection of stupid fucking tshirts that i think ilya would wear
stupid shirts ilya would buy for himself
stupid shirts ilya would buy for shane
more stupid ilya shirts
even more stupid ilya shirts