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Im cute and im sexy and thats why im allowed to build my wizard tower within city limits. Zoning laws dont apply to me because the whole city council is so charmed by my voluminous robes and funny hat.

i think theyre actually charmed by that spell u put on them, not ur style

You take me for a beguiler? Accuse me of bewitchment? Nay, I say not. If theyre bespelled by anything its by my luminous personality and dumptruck asscheeks

putting "live laugh love" and "home" signs in my MURDER MAZE DUNGEON to make my MURDER MAZE VICTIMS feel more at ease

Sitting here vibrating just thinking about all the evil tings I could say

No Homo We Smokin Penisas

I am having a full throttle giggle attack…I am dying. I need to get off this app & get chicken & pasta stat!!!!

So so so fucking real

don’t let this flop por favor but please rb & tag with your moon/venus sign and whether you feel flattered or uncomfortable when someone has a crush on you that’s not mutual I’ll start