more fun than your body has room for

harsh words from one of the muppet babies

ALWAYS REMEMBER: THE NIGHT IS DARKEST JUST BEOFRE IT KEEPS GOING FOREVER

notice that no one on MTV Cribs has an emergency eyewash station

Ice tea and bruschetta when it's hot out makes me feel like one of those guys who gets interviewed on why he's so healthy at 116 years old

my favorite thing about the mystery genre is that we all accept the concept of "world famous detective" without hesitation even though that is absolutely not a real category of celebrity

cleaned out the garage and found my old thinking cap from when i would think

we all have that one cousin who rolls around a ball that picks stuff up

brrrrrrng-ha

im going to fix my entire life

When?

Like Um. later

i just unzip my cloaca and let the posts gush out of me