more fun than your body has room for

whenever i’m stressed about doing something my brain will automatically repeat 2-3 Half Life: Full Life Consequences to itself as a means of motivating (?) me and it doesn’t work and actually only serves to piss me off. but it keeps happening

So full that i see my giant roast chicken as a man stranded on a raft with me

In the strip club with the coin jar

such a good reaction image

I'm pretty sure a lot of people on this website are straight up stupid but know enough individual facts that they are convinced they aren't

reading a historical romance novel and reflecting on the way these stories often present woke nobility for the contemporary reader. a big thing is servants. you can’t not have servants in those times but many modern readers think “but I would never have servants. it would be so weird to have servants” and in order to make the protagonists of the story more relatable they are actually friends with the servants. but flip your perspective and think of it from the side of the servants. wouldn’t it be so awful if your boss was always trying to be friends with you. a really common thing you’ll see is the woke baronet having tea in the kitchen with the servants bc he’s not like other baronets. but what if your boss wanted to hang out and talk during your lunch break every day. not so charming when you think about it that way

i did a google search for "most recent invention" which my girlfriend said was something strong bad would do

This email could have been a flayed screaming man

unclean = adj. of or pertaining to uncles

Wait this isnt gay sex this is working at my job

Wait! I can change! *grotesquely transforms into a snarling ghoul*

getting kicked off love island for just swimming in the pool and not talking to anyone

mitch mcconell died doing what he loved. looking like a turtle.