more fun than your body has room for

This email could have been a flayed screaming man

unclean = adj. of or pertaining to uncles

Wait this isnt gay sex this is working at my job

Wait! I can change! *grotesquely transforms into a snarling ghoul*

getting kicked off love island for just swimming in the pool and not talking to anyone

mitch mcconell died doing what he loved. looking like a turtle.

(talking to my forwards-facing buddy) strafe over here dude

do nuns have pockets

gonna get out of bed and invent a new revolutionary movement called lunchpunk

drinking a beer in a hammock in the sun realizing maybe i don't have to hit myself with hammers every day forever just some or most days

his wife has filled THEIR house with ANTIQUES. to AVOID DAMAGING HER VALUABLES i fuck him on the floor

high as fuck lowballing never worn baby shoe listings

something decidedly unchic is afoot

Smells like coin in elevator. Some one walked their pet penny ?

1920s guy driving a model t with a "i bought this before ford went crazy" bumper sticker