How To Set Yourself On Fire

kind of a milf. reblog

fill your body with cranberries so the horse that kills you gets a sensual surprise when he begins to feed

i will give the  horse that kills me no such luxury

interesting dates on this post

let the contemporary record show mr beast was pretty ignorable for his whole career if you were just like, busy.

i am always one wrong word away from being shot by all the people who find me tolerable

Give a man a leaf and he will eat it. Teach a man to leaf and he will go away

posts that could have also been in a newspaper in 1910 on a slow day

was about to make a post saying “putting the word berry up on a shelf” in response to seeing two -berry posts in a row but then i realized how meaningless and cruel that would be for me to say

this reads like it was submitted to a local newspaper in the early 1900s

i need to get off tumblr i’m at the aquarium admiring the fish and my brain goes “posts that make you want to get in the water” what are you talking about. these are live fish in the room with you. what post.

World Heritage Post

having unwashed hair will have you believing shit like i can’t be saved

“let’s run away together” trope fucks me up bc it’s almost always doomed. but what if it’s not this time.

I hope I'm online when it happens. I want to see a sudden flood of crab rave memes right after refreshing my dash, and in the middle of it all, the Castiel news meme. That's how I want to learn of it; not through anything solemn or serious, but via overwhelming silly celebration.

I hate Elon musk so fucking much