in my field of work i meet a lot of gay men (it's not related to them, just a funny coincidence) and i can't help but notice a weird pattern. when we're all in a more informal setting, they feel comfortable with sexual-related jokes, even between them and straight men (think of a random dialogue from some dudebro quirky bromance comedy), it's all fine and cool when we talk about penises in sometimes graphic detail. no one's getting weirded out by it, straight men are sometimes the ones who encourage it.
now imagine that sort of thing but with lesbians. in a mixed social setting, straight women and men, lesbians and gays, and then someone jokes about vaginas and/or lesbian sex with her best friend. i've never heard anything like that in this kind of scenario. it would certainly raise a few brows at least.
even straight men are comfortable with joking about sex between them and their friends, penis feels like a normal topic of discussion, something funny - but not in a derogatory way. vaginas, i'm afraid, are in a different category, like something that's meant to be either objectified or shamed. i'm exhausted, where are the lesbians who will joke with me about our vaginas?? this topic shouldn't be so taboo. we see penises everywhere, and the normalisation of it feels horrendous, when you think about how the society usually treats vaginas.