🌸pipis room🌸

humans don’t have enough ornamentation. where’s the plumage, the antlers

i could go for a good vibrant throat sac i could display as i sing in the mating season

Humans have some of the most extreme hair variation over their bodies in the animal kingdom, with hair on some parts of our body a few millimetres long and fine enough to be almost invisible, and hair in other parts a good metre long if not artificially trimmed. Part of the inside of our mouths are turned out to make our lips bright red, we have comically oversized breasts and lack penis bones to make erections more indicative of impressive circulation, and have some of the most complex behavioural adaptations to self-ornamentation for courtship seen in anything that doesn’t spend half its life collecting blue bottle caps. How much ornamentation do you want?

I’d like antlers, as previously stated

my favorite thing is when you pick up an animal and you look them in the eyes and you can tell nothings going on behind them. you look at them and theres just elevator music. stupid animals really are like the fucking best, the lights are on but no one is home

that also happens when u pick me up and look into my eyes

i had NO IDEA that Dreamworks movie about the holiday mascots flopped because all I saw on tumblr was anime renderings of Jack Frost for like a SOLID year

Of all the possible jokes in this format I did not expect the Tower of Babel

chickens need protein too!

if you beat this chicken, the loot near by is mace called poultry pestle and it reads “winner winner chicken dinner”

idk how anyone wears airpods. apple earbuds are already rigged to fall out of your ears if you turn your head 0.3 degrees. how the fuck are you supposed to go jogging or whatever without dropping them on the sidewalk and watching them scatter aimlessly like ice cubes from the glass of bourbon that your wife dropped when you told her you wanted a divorce

where’s it going

Straight to Hell

The extremely rare 6th stage of grief.