Forever a gauche

I can’t focus on my tumblr accounts right now seriously. This one and on my other blog because I’m too busy doing other things to be honest. Even though it’s still sembreak. I’m currently studying about HTML and CSS. Thanks to codecademy and bento. Apparently I will be face to face with “computer programming” next school year so I need to familiarize myself first so I won’t look like a lost puppy. But still, there are still too much to learn before I encounter “programming”. Well, that’s according to bento.

Another thing is I’m currently editing a video about ALDUB and seriously I really hate the downloading and finding videos part when editing because ughhhh I’m too lazy to download tons of 1-3 hours videos for a 15 seconds clip!! And I can’t find clips of videos in high quality and without watermarks T^T.

Aaaaand the last thing is I’m busy searching for reference blogs and saving the links so I can use it in the future. 

Hello~ So the following are some of my favorite quotes and these quotes are mostly about life. Advices, inspiration, etc. 

"Whatever causes night in our souls may leave stars.” -Victor Hugo "Confidence isn’t walking into a room with your nose in the air, and thinking you are better than everyone else, it’s walking into a room and not having to compare yourself to anyone else in the first place.” "A flower does not think of competing to the flower next to it. It just blooms.” "No matter where you’re from, your dreams are valid.” -Lupita Nyong'o WHOEVER IS REALLY MEANT TO BE IN YOUR LIFE WILL ALWAYS GRAVITATE BACK TO YOU, NO MATTER HOW FAR THEY WANDER OFF "There’s no way I was born to just pay bills and die." Mosaics are made from broken pieces but they’re still works of art and so are you. “You cannot disrespect the caterpillar and rave about the butterfly.” “Because at the end of the day, you were born with you and you’re going to die with you, so you need to love you.” “No one is you and that is your power.” “Normality is a paved road: It’s comfortable to walk,? but no flowers grow on it.” — vincent van gogh

“I want to be like water. I want to slip through fingers, but hold up a ship.” "When it’s over, leave. Don’t continue watering a dead flower." "A reader lives a thousand lives before he dies, the man who never reads lives only one." “Women are considered fragile but I’ve never seen anything as easily wounded as a man’s ego.” “Don’t ever put your happiness in someone else’s hands. They’ll drop it. They’ll drop it everytime.” —One For Sorrow, C.Barzak Never get too attached to anyone unless they also feel the same towards you, because one sided expectations can mentally destroy you. Everyone wants to be the sun to lighten up everyone’s life, but why not be the moon, to brighten in the darkest hour. A great fire burns within me, but no one stops to warm themselves at it, and passers-by only see a wisp of smoke. —Vincent van Gogh I am not afraid to die, but to think I haven’t lived. That terrifies me. Wear your tragedies as armor, not shackles. I am a forest, and a night of dark trees: but he who is not afraid of my darkness, will find banks full of roses under my cypresses. Everyone sees what you appear to be, few experience what you really are.

— Niccolò Machiavelli, The Prince Happiness is like a butterfly: the more you chase it, the more it will elude you. But if you turn your attention to other things, it will come and sit softly on your shoulder.

This is a blog prompt from Blog Matter btw! :)

My name is: Jo Ann

My birthday is: March 4th, 2000

I live in: Philippines

I am currently studying/working as: a high school student :)

I have been blogging since: this year

I blog about: my life and other inspirational advices from me (loljk)

My blog is called [gauchelifexoxo] because: I’m a gauche and I blog about my life and I just added xoxo because I just want to.

I love watching: movies, korean dramas, animes, and kalyeserye

I love reading: English novels. 

I love doing: procrastinating, video editing and photo editing

I love playing: lawn tennis

I love listening to: indies, indie-pop, rnb, kpop, and alternative rock (sometimes pop)

I love collecting: nothing. I’m a collector of nothing. lol

Favorite book: this might be the hardest one. Ummm... ohmygod it’s so hard to choose! Umm Catastrophic History of You and Me I think... lol

Favorite movie: Flipped

Favorite song: sway - the perishers

Favorite TV show: my favorite tv show is a korean variety show called “Running Man”

Favorite game: computer game - Diablo II board game - snakes & ladders video game - tekken 

My pets: I used to have dogs but now they’re all gone :’( and I currently have none because I can’t have one because of our “business”

My tattoos: –

My piercings: –

If I was a fruit I would be a: potato? loljk! ermm grapes :) 

If I was a season I would be: winter I think because I’m a cold person. not

If I was a tree I would be a: Pine tree because I don’t know

If I was a stone/gem/mineral I would be: diamond because I shine bright lolwhut

If I was a planet I would be: Pluto because I’m always the forgotten one! haha

If I was a superhero/supervision I would be: the female version of Hulk because I transform whenever I’m angry

If I was a color I would be: pale yellow but I can’t explain why

If I was an animal I would be: Sloth because I’m clingy as fck

If I was a word I would be: supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

If I was a number I would be: 4

As a child I wanted to be a: doctor, to heal people but everything’s changed now

Something I like about myself: I’m sensitive and open-minded about other people and my surroundings

I am proud of the fact that I: can do what I set in my mind

OH MY GOD. Just what the hell am I doing blogging instead of reviewing right now? It’s 4:07 PM for God’s sake Jo Ann open your book na! You will have your periodic test pa for tomorrow uy! 

It’s Monday today and we’re supposed to have our test today but fortunately unfortunately, a storm came to visit our country that’s why all levels of classes are suspended. Naku Lando ilang bubong na ang pinalipad mo?! Haha. 

It was raining really hard yesterday and it was soooo cold. Feeling nasa Baguio lang ang peg. Unfortunately fortunately, the rain stopped today. But the wind is still soooo strong. Nakakapalipad pa din siya ng bubong kahit walang ulan. 

I don’t know if tomorrow, this will stop na and it will be a normal day again except that there’s a periodic test. Ughhhhh. Can you come back rain? Please? LOL just kidding. 

I do hope they suspend classes for tomorrow again because I’m still not ready! Hahaha obviously! I have not yet opened a single book/notebook since Friday. I know in the end, I will just cram again like I always do whenever we have exams or something. But to be honest, I want to remove this trait of mine. Because in the end I’m always the one who’s suffering eh. Wag niyo akong tularan guys! Haha. Yung mukhang zombie pag nagtest na kasi walang tulog. And always super bangag kapag may exam kasi cram ng cram. Hahahaha. *too much information*.

Okay so I’m a teenage girl. It’s pretty normal for me to have “crushes” at this age. BUT why is it that whenever I have my eyes set on someone, there will always be “complications”? I swear to God I never had a crush who lasted for more than 4 months! Haha.

For my whole existence, I only had like 5 crushes. First one was in grade 6, second one was in grade 8. and third, fourth and fifth in grade 9.

I’m not really the type of girl who crushes on a guy who’s popular, very handsome, and the guy-who-everyone-in-my-school-falls-for a.k.a hearthrob. I’m more like the girl who crushes on someone who isn’t that noticeable, who’s never the center of attention, and underrated kind of guy.

Honestly, I myself don’t know the reason why I get attracted to those kinds of guys. I mean.. they’re not even attractive. I don’t even know their attitudes. I really have no idea who are they at first. But daaaaamn pag tinamaan ka, tatamaan ka talaga eh.

Pero bakit ganun? Hindi na ako nagkacrush ng matino?! I’m not saying na abnormal sila pero.... ugh. Dumating na talaga sa point na I vowed to myself na hindi na ako magkakacrush kahit sa kung sinuman. Hahaha.

Eh kasi naman... kung hindi bading, eh nagiging taken! Jusko! Nakakaloka! Hahaha. I don’t know if it’s coincidence or not, but everytime na nagkakacrush ako sakanila, it’s either they turn out gay or nagiging taken! Hahaha.

Words of wisdom from yours truly.

If you want it, just go for it!

Stop listening to all the negative people around you who does nothing but discourage you. If you think no one will get hurt if you do it, just do it. If you think this is good for your future, then fucking do it. No sugarcoating words. Just fucking do it!

This is Y O U R life. YOU should be the one who should decide for your future. Not your friends, not your family, not anybody else. It should be YOU. Don’t let anyone dictate you what you should do for the rest of your life. Stop depending on others’ decision. 

You only get to live once. If you don’t want to end up regretting things because you didn’t do what you wanted to do in the first place, then you should start deciding for yourself. Right now.

Imagine you’re already 80 years old. Sitting on a rocking chair. Staring outside your house. You can’t stand properly anymore. You can’t walk properly anymore. Wrinkled and old. You didn’t do what you wanted when you were younger. And now you’re staring at the blankness, regretting, regretting and regretting. Because while you had the chance, you didn’t take it. You just let it pass. “Why didn’t I have the guts to do it?” “Why didn’t I take the risk?” “Why didn’t I take the chance?” “Why didn’t I do this? Why didn’t I do that?”

I will ask you. Do you want to end up that way? Do you want to end up cursing yourself because you didn’t follow your heart? Do you want to end up hating yourself because you didn’t have the courage to do it? At all? Because if you don’t, then JUST FUCKING GO FOR IT.

To end this post, I will just end it with a line of a song I think all of you knows very much.

Running Man. Gaaaahh, I just love this South Korean variety show way too much. I already watched almost all episodes. There are some I didn’t watch because it’s either I don’t like the guest or the flow of the story is not up to my taste. But anyways, I loved this show because whenever I watch them, I always feel like I have this certain connection to them that makes me feel like I’m part of their family/team. This show has the power to make you feel like that that’s why they really became famous not only nationwide but worldwide. Every country they went to, there are always like thousands of fans waiting for them.

This show is literally my ultimate stress reliever. Whenever I feel sad or distressed about something, what I do is I rewatch some episodes, and then everything will feel better again. Sometimes I will just find myself giggling at like 3 in the morning because of watching this show. 

Time check: 8:41 P.M

Currently doing: thinking of something relevant to post. Other than that, nothing. Lol.

Now playing: I by Taeyeon (feeling inspirational. haha)

By the way, this is my first post on this blog. Obviously. (Ugh I am so stupid).

Anyway, I just made this post to compile my thoughts about the whole week. 

This week ended so fast. No surprise there. Too many school works. Performances, practices, etc.. Same old same old. Didn’t do anything unusual this week. Still socially awkward. Lol. (wait, why the hell am I always using lol? Lol.) Ugh. Jo Ann please stop it with your weirdness! 

To be honest, I currently have anxiety right now. Tomorrow’s our play. Thursday and Friday is our periodic test. After that, I need to have my final decision about what school I’m going to go to for Senior High School. Ugggh.

I always remind myself not to worry about my future too much. But truthfully, it’s such a hard thing to do. It’s so easy to say but daaaamn. I mean... my parents are not the type who pressures their child for his/her future but why the hell am I like this? What’s the root of all of this “worrying”? Why can’t I just be a happy-go-lucky person for once? Why???? *cries in the corner*

So to end this post, I’ll just end it with a simple quote I know too much.